Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

To think that even if you have no money, you need treats?

135 replies

NettoSuperstar · 14/04/2011 20:35

I'm prepared for a flaming over this.

I've no money, none, in debt up to my eyeballs and no way atm of paying any of it off, yet in the last couple of weeks, I've spent money on a couple of books, and used all the points on my Boots card on make up.
I also sometimes buy takeaway, though that has to stop now, as I really can't manage that any more.

It's shit being skint, proper crap, and the little treats are what get you through the day.

What is £3 when you owe £10K?

OP posts:

southeastastra · 14/04/2011 20:37

you're a long time dead!

southeastastra · 14/04/2011 20:37

NorthernGobshite · 14/04/2011 20:38

YANBU. I think as long as you prioritise the important stuff, then treats are what make the hard work bearable!!

cybbo · 14/04/2011 20:38

Ok some might say all those £3's could add up to help pay off your debts adn you should find pleasure in things that cost nothing. You could use the Library for books? Or borrowing from a friend? It sounds like its the 'retail' experience you feel you are missing.

Oh and Yes to stopping takeaways

CharlotteBronteSaurus · 14/04/2011 20:39

sounds fair enough.
when we were proper skint i used to put one of the M&S dine in for £10 deals on my credit card once a month.

FranSanDisco · 14/04/2011 20:39

There's no pockets in shrouds so my old school mate used to tell me .

BabyDubsEverywhere · 14/04/2011 20:39

Im ordering take out tonight on the credit card, skint, starting new business, working like dogs and feeling ill, i need comfort damn it!

MissPaintyOeuf · 14/04/2011 20:40

I agree, if you're talking about treating yourself to a bar of chocolate or a bit of makeup once a week. It's the people whose idea of a treat is a new item of clothing every lunchtime that end up deeper and deeper in debt.

FlorenceDaphne · 14/04/2011 20:40

I kind of see what you mean, but the puritan in me disagrees. Mind you, I get the guilt if I buy myself a superfluous present for two pounds. I suppose it depends how much you're spending and how often really...

Bearcat · 14/04/2011 20:43

Yes definately you need your treats, but try the local library for your books. They'll order them for you if they haven't got them in!

cybbo · 14/04/2011 20:44

My Brother and Sil are DEEP in debt, on the bones of their arse and they have this 'why shouldn't I ?'sense of entitlement about some things, like holidays , or big presents for their kids at Xmas and birthdays. And I want to scream BECAUSE YOU CAN'T BLOODY AFFORD IT THAT's WHY

chicletteeth · 14/04/2011 20:45

Go to the library for books, if you've no money that is a bad purchase.
Make-up I can understand I suppose.

It's your debt though and you're adding to it by doing this but if you really feel it helps you get through, then it doesn't sound too bad!

PebblesAndWine · 14/04/2011 20:46

YANBU but I'm in an iva so don't take my advice!

LadyOfTheManor · 14/04/2011 20:48

You should set an amount for "treats" say £10 a month. TBH if you have no money then keeping a roof over your head and food on the table is privilege enough?

DurhamDurham · 14/04/2011 20:49

I agree about needing a treat. When we've had no money in the past we have still gone out for a coffee and slice of cake after a walk along the coast. It's what kept me going when we dh got made redundant. I need to have little treats and outings to look forward to.

When we have money our treats just get a bit more expensive

Prinnie · 14/04/2011 20:50

YANBU but there are much nicer treats for free - try and enjoy the simple pleasures - a beautiful park, finding 20p on the street, hearing your favourite song/piece of music on the radio - they'll always be there :)

NorthernGobshite · 14/04/2011 20:53

I agree with people suggesting using the library. I used to spend a fortune on books but since financial ruin have used library and read all kinds of books I would never have bought.

fuzzywuzzy · 14/04/2011 20:55

I agree, I actually save up small amounts over several months and buy something I really want, it gives me something to look forward too.

Otherwise life would be just bills, and fulfilling basic needs.

woollyideas · 14/04/2011 20:56

I'm in the same boat as you OP, but have had to learn to live without treats, even of the £2 variety. TBH I don't know how sustainable it is because it feels like crap when you don't even have the money to replace your bloody toothbrush. Every time I put those splayed bristles into my mouth I feel resentful...

Thinking of splurging on one at the weekend.

Tee2072 · 14/04/2011 20:56

Nope. Treats should be budgeted first. Woman cannot live on basics alone.

Original poster

NettoSuperstar · 14/04/2011 21:00

The Library won't have the books-one has just come out, and the other is signed.
I do use the Library though.
Yep, takeaway is gone for now, gutting really, because I love it of a Saturday night, but I'm a great cook so will do a lovely home made meal instead.

The make up was bought with saved points on the card (loyalty card, not credit card).

I am careful with money, I have to be, but those small treats do get me through the week.
I spend maybe £5 a week on average on them.

OP posts:

Bumblequeen · 14/04/2011 21:01

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at poster's request.

Mare11bp · 14/04/2011 21:03

I am always skint I work part time and the nursery fees each month just about finish me off.

But without the occasional treat I would be so depressed. I do similar buy something (last purchase a winter coat) then spent next 3 months paying it off.

If you got another credit card and went on a massive spending spree with ridiculous rates of interest that would be one thing otherwise YANBU.

Your occasional treats are hardly lavish!

onceamai · 14/04/2011 21:04

Make-up is essential but the books could come from the library. We aren't skint but might have a takeaway once every couple of months and I always feel guilty spending so much on essentially poor quality food.

Treats can be a walk in the park or along the river or a cuddle up with the dc in the big bed, or a bubble bath (and I still buy Sainsbury's cheap stuff).

Good luck OP - hope things look up soon, 'tis better to be poor and happy than rich and miserable but as I my mum used to tell me "if you have to be miserable, it's better to be rich and miserable than poor and miserable".

Pawan · 14/04/2011 21:04

George Orwell (in his book "the road to Wigan pier") said it was the "treats" that kept the "working class" going. He comments that you might think to criticise the non essentials - in this case, the extravagance of sugar in their cups of tea; but it was this that kept people going - small treats in an otherwise frugal budget.

I use this argument with my DH every so often to justify something ...." ...it is just the same as sugar in my tea...."

Having said this, you need to work out your budget and try to stick to it. We're not in debt, but we are on a pretty tight budget - i certainly can't afford books any more (we go to the library) nor takeaways, nor much else other than basics.

So keep some treats, make them fun :) and keep them within your set budget.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6