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AIBU?

To be Disturbed by this woman in a Burka? ......

1001 replies

Gingefringe · 11/04/2011 16:45

I saw a very strange event in Debenhams make-up counter this week-end which on reflection, I found very disturbing.
A woman in a full burka (including her eyes covered in thin veil) came up to the make-up counter with a man (presumably DH). The man then proceeded to ask about foundation for the woman and had a conversation with the sales assistant which rarely included the woman at all (apart from trying on a sample colour on her hand).
I felt so sorry for the poor woman - not only to be forced to wear this ridiculous veil but she wasn't allowed even to chose her own make-up!
I did give the man my best evil looks but he didn't seem to notice - perhaps because I was a woman!! I was too cowardly to say anything.
On the day that France bans the burka I wonder whether you would have said anything?

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YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 19:19

Bottom pinching, constant propersitioning all because a Lady is White. NO wonder they have to wear a burka...

My ex Muslim husband, his family, friends think that White women are whores! Their racism and general backward attitude towards White women and the West is so ingrained it will never change for at least 100 years. Times have to change.

worraliberty · 11/04/2011 19:20

So you understand what I mean then ladyofthemanor

TheSecondComing · 11/04/2011 19:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumoverseas · 11/04/2011 19:21

In this country we have the right to wear whatever we like - which is as it should be. In Saudi or similar you might be arrested for wearing shorts - and you want women to be arrested here for their clothing choices too! You hypocrites. Who the fuck ever held Saudi up as a society to aspire to? - That is exactly what would happen in Saudi if any woman, local or western went out wearing shorts.

Live and let live

LadyOfTheManor · 11/04/2011 19:22

Yes I am furious that women are being told what to wear.

Youaretoo- yes I understand how some Islamic men think, I'm originally from an Islamic country.

gordyslovesheep · 11/04/2011 19:22

well for your ex husband and his friends I agree - but I doubt very much they speak for ALL muslim men the world over and not for the ones I know

I have no doubt some Muslim men are vile - just as many non muslim men are - and a fair few women

I do pmsl that people hide behind a bit of 'faux' concern form oppressed women when it's really Islamaphobia - if it was all about the oppression of women then maybe they should concerntrait on funding womens refuges etc rather than dictating what women can wear

mumoverseas · 11/04/2011 19:24

LadyOfTheManor · 11/04/2011 19:24

Well said Gordy. nice to see you again...shame we only ever meet on these threads!

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 19:24

Islamaphobia - nah!!!!

Just something to hide behind really isn't it that term?

Muslim women are mainly oppressed i see it everywhere everyday and i lived it.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 19:26

My is a Lawyer and his feriend has a PHD in computer science. Nice guys but oppreesed their wives, very worried about public imagerumours/gossip in 'the community' to the point of insanity!

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 19:26

MY ex

CoteDAzur · 11/04/2011 19:27

Those looking at this as "freedom to dress as you like" are missing the point.

Burqa ban is about shunning the mentality of the Burqa - that women should be hidden from view, that men are weak creatures who would be aroused out of their minds by seeing an elbow or a knee, etc. France is a secular country with equality as one of its three main tenets, meaning that the state has no religion, schools have no prayers nor religious symbols and it is fundamentally abhorrent in this country for one religion to hide away its women.

I despise Sarkozy on many different levels, but I fully support the Burqa ban in France.

gordyslovesheep · 11/04/2011 19:27

and lots of non Muslim women are - so what's that all about - maybe you are getting your obsession with Muslims get in the way of the fact that abusive and oppressive men exist all over :)

LadyOfTheManor · 11/04/2011 19:28

Youaretoo- I don't think you can speak on behalf of Muslim women by saying "most". I presume you haven't been raised in a Muslim country as a Muslim? Or did you just marry a Muslim and be somewhat the "outsider" to the family? This would dictate they way they treated you.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 19:28

Not the point really....

LadyOfTheManor · 11/04/2011 19:29

Cote- can't you see it's part of the patriarchal society? Men dictating to women what to wear or men saying;

"we want you to be free, we shall remove the burden of the burka". How kind of them. What about what the women want?

alexpolismum · 11/04/2011 19:30

CoteD'Azur - very nicely put. If only it were possible to get rid of that mentality altogether. I also support the ban in France.

YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 19:30

No walking alone - same for Aunties. No going out after dark alone. No looking at men. No speaking to men. No male friends. Not allowed opinions of my own. Eyes down when in public or men in ther room. Cover my hair/arms/legs etc. Lots more too...

CoteDAzur · 11/04/2011 19:32

"Muslim women are mainly oppressed"

Which "Muslim women"? The ones in your neighborhood? The ones you met through your oppressive ex-husband?

Hardly a sample that would allow you to generalize about more than half a billion Muslim women worldwide.

LadyOfTheManor · 11/04/2011 19:33

Right so you want to ban the burka. Interesting. What if Mr.Cameron came on television tomorrow and said;

"We're sick of seeing breasts on display, women do it because misogynistic men require it through advertising and power and control. So from this moment on, any woman showing below her collarbone will be fined and sent to a class to learn otherwise".

Sod off if any of you would be pleased with that. The burka causes less offence to me than seeing a half naked woman.

alexpolismum · 11/04/2011 19:34

Ladyofthe Manor - these women do not exist in a vacuum. Even if it is a choice for them to wear the burqua, they are perpetuating the mentality as described by Cote D'Azur, and having a detrimental affect on other women by making such misogyny seem acceptable.

LadyOfTheManor · 11/04/2011 19:35

Can't you see that by men dictating what they can wear EITHER way is a bad thing? You HAVE to wear it to be undermined by another set of men saying "you CANNOT wear it". It's got nothing to do with them.

alexpolismum · 11/04/2011 19:36

I don't like seeing breasts on display particularly, LadyoftheManor and I would ban Page 3 and Rupert Murdoch too if I could. It is a separate issue from the burqua, though.

CoteDAzur · 11/04/2011 19:36

Lady - I actually live in France, speak fluent French, and have followed the debates on this topic through the past year. Whatever makes you think the Burqa ban in France is a product of "patriarchal society", you are quite wrong.

wubblybubbly · 11/04/2011 19:37

"Can anyone explain to me how it cannot be sexist and controlling for women to wear such a restrictive garment as the burqua when men don't wear it?"

Couldn't the same be said about the bra?

I'll finish reading the thread now.

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