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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be really f*cking p*ssed off with my neighbour for this?

166 replies

DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 09/04/2011 19:45

We bought DD a trampoline (8ft) this week for the garden, and she absolutely loves it, it's so sweet, she wants to be on it constantly, and since we bought it, our garden has been full of giggles all day long as we all lark about on it.
The neighbour who's garden backs onto ours (their house is sideways on to ours, so the side of their house over looks our garden) is currently having a loft extension, with a large window on the side that is looking directly into our garden. She stopped my husband this morning, as he was bouncing with DD, and asked him to move the trampoline. She is upset as if adults bounce on it, we can see directly into her garden, and she can see it from her garden and it's a bit of an eye sore.
WTF???!!! We have said NOTHING about the fact they are putting a big fuck off window over looking our garden, we have said NOTHING about the fact that we should have had notification from the council about it with the option to complain about the plans, we have said NOTHING about the fact that their ugly loft conversion will block out the afternoon sun from our garden - because that's just life when you live in a street like this isn't it?
Am so angry that she has the audacity to ask us to move our fucking trampoline cos she doesn't like the look of it. And I'm sorry darling but I'm not that desperate to see into your garden.
So angry.
AIBU to be this p*ssed off??! My DD loves this trampoline so much and now I feel awkward going on there with her.

OP posts:
YouaretooniceNOT · 10/04/2011 16:48

LMAO ^

chocadoodle · 10/04/2011 19:30

OP, any update on the trampoline situation today?

Original poster
DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 10/04/2011 19:51

minieggfan of course she's entitled to peace and quiet in her garden - but she has small children who make a normal amount of noise in their garden and have done over the years before we had children, with no complaint by us I hasten to add - so it's not as if she needs a quiet haven. And we're not on there for hours - we'd literally just put it up and it was DH's first go on it when she asked him to move it! It had been there about 5 minutes!
Anyway, I have moved it to the middle of the garden, so when we bounce on it, we can't see into her garden and I doubt they can see us either. I'm going to get a landscaper in this week to cut some of the trees back at the side of the garden and I'm going to put it there instead. I know the next door neighbours won't mind as they're my mates and their little ones will probably be round to bounce on it too.
I think they've been out all day (the miserable lot) but I was very careful this morning not to let DD out on it until 9am, she had half an hour then, then some more bouncing before lunch, and some more bouncing before her bath. So we've not been out there much today. I am hoping she's feeling a bit contrite now she's seen that I've moved it, but sadly she's probably just feeling triumphant.

OP posts:
princessparty · 10/04/2011 21:10

what's all this bollocks people are posting about people having the right to peace and quiet in their garden? where do you get that from? If you live next to a busy road you expect noise from that.If you live in a house with a garden surrounded by other gardens you expect noise from them.Kids playing , lawn mowing, hedge trimming , trampolines boucing.If you don't like it buy a house in the middle of nowhere

Beaaware · 10/04/2011 21:13

just say no

Flisspaps · 10/04/2011 21:20

You can have my 12ft trampoline if you like, she'll beg you to get the 8ft one back then.

Don't restrict DD's time on it either, let her bounce away as much as she likes - she has the right to enjoy her garden just as much as the woman next door!

CocktailQueen · 10/04/2011 21:25

I'd complain to the council pronto about her extension/window. Some people are ridiculous. Leave the trampoline where it is if that's the best place for it.

Original poster
DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 10/04/2011 21:51

You're right Flisspaps (love your name btw Grin ) I shouldn't restrict her time on it, she bloody loves it and when we're out of the house she keeps asking if we can go home and 'see trampoline?' Smile
The pissed off part of me wishes I didn't move it but the rational part of me knows that in order to allow DD to fully enjoy it, I needed to move it. As she is only little (22months) so does need me bouncing on it with her most of the time, and I have this 'being watched' feeling each time I am going on it when they're in their garden. So I want to be able to go on there and lark about with her without feeling self conscious.
You would have laughed though, just after we had the confrontation, DD asked me to bounce with her, of course I said I would as I was damned if I would let her spoil DD's fun, so I bounced with her in my arms, she then promptly pointed at their garden and said 'Who's that mummy?' Grin Grin
Invasion of privacy? You got it! Grin

OP posts:
Triggles · 10/04/2011 23:01

I just find it odd that children playing, for the most part, even bothers anyone. We have a neighbour that has a trampoline - you can often see kids pop up in the air, and they're fairly noisy laughing with the occasional shrieking. But who cares? It just kids. We actually get a giggle out of listening to them - kind of reminds us of all the silly stuff we did as kids. I don't have a problem at all with it, and neither does DH.

I will admit my dad did used to get very upset when the kids made noise in the rear garden - he was always saying "can't they be more quiet? what will the neighbours think??" and I'd have to say "not much, as one of those shrieking kids in my garden is their child!" Grin

princessparty · 10/04/2011 23:14

www.planningportal.gov.uk/permission/commonprojects/loftconversion/miniguide this tells you about whether or not you need planning permission.A roof in a loft extension nearly inevitab;y causes overlooking.I strongly suspect that your neighbours don't need planning

RueLaChesty · 10/04/2011 23:30

Missmarjoribanks, i have only been back at work a few weeks after maternity leave so unless things have changed the council don't send the neighbour notifications out, the agent does. Usually with private property the council isn't the agent. So on the planning application you have to list the addresses that you (agent) have sent the neighbour notification to. As i said this may have changed in last 9/10 months and is the scottish regs. I must check tomorrow now!

My aunt and uncle had a situation that their neighbour built an extension on to the side of their property but the eaves overhang encroached onto my aunts property. They contacted the council but as they had been "sent" a neighbour notification they couldn't object as they hadn't within the timescale. Never received notification, checked with other neighbours who had never received notification. Turns out that they had extended more than they had stated in building warrant (by about 1200mm) so had to rectify it anyway.

OP hope your dd is enjoying her trampoline and i'm sure as the weather continues to get better there will be much more fun and frolics with paddling pools and the like so hopefully your neighbour has chilled out by then!

TwoIfBySea · 10/04/2011 23:43

Such fun! YANBU. Loving some of the suggestions on here although I'd definitely be concerned about the extension. You might not want to create a fuss but what if you want to move and it knocks the price down?

Wish I had a trampoline for my dts as the neighbours here are fine and I back on to football fields but I'm scared I'll buy it and not be able to put it up myself!

TwoIfBySea · 10/04/2011 23:43

Such fun! YANBU. Loving some of the suggestions on here although I'd definitely be concerned about the extension. You might not want to create a fuss but what if you want to move and it knocks the price down?

Wish I had a trampoline for my dts as the neighbours here are fine and I back on to football fields but I'm scared I'll buy it and not be able to put it up myself!

Original poster
DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 11/04/2011 12:31

You're right, I didn't think about having difficulty selling due to being that over looked in the garden.
Bugger I'd better investigate this hadn't I. She will think it's sour grapes but hey ho. Could do without knocking our house price down any further Sad

OP posts:
savoycabbage · 11/04/2011 12:41

You and your dd should both dress as pirates. But you should wear two eye-patches so you can't spy and your dd should have a telescope so she can tell you anything you have missed.

bemybebe · 11/04/2011 12:45

Hmm, trampoline thing aside, I would have a long think about the window as it make it harder for you to see your property since it is so overlooked.

My house is old and when others were built around it none of their windows were positioned to overlook the garden or into our rooms. Very thoughtful.

bemybebe · 11/04/2011 12:46

Not 'see', SELL, sorry Blush

The3Bears · 11/04/2011 12:49

How selfish can children not play and have fun now, we too have just got a 8 ft trampoline and put it near our fence our neighbour hasnt said anything but I think shes annoyed as ds's ball went over yesterday went to knock on and apoligise and she had took it and popped it selfish cow
Really bugs me though as children should be entitled to have fun and its not like there out past half 6 on it so not really anoying.

everlong · 11/04/2011 12:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lesley33 · 11/04/2011 12:52

The law changed on planning permission - I think last year. What it means is that lots of extensions and conversions now don't need planning permission, when previously they would have needed it. So the fact that you weren't consulted by the council on the extension, probably means that they didn't need planning permission - unless they were daft enough to just build it without checking out this issue.

Yes there are restrictions in term of windows overlooking other properties. But as the OP has her garden between her and the neighbours extension, this would be unlikely to apply.

Original poster
DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 11/04/2011 13:02

Grin @ savoycabbage

OP posts:
Original poster
DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 11/04/2011 13:04

They're in their garden today, and we have been bouncing. But now I've moved it we can't see into their garden at all.
I was hoping she'd hear us and call out a thank you for moving it. But no. Bitch.
I've emailed the council asking how I lodge a complaint. Worried about that damn window now.
They already have 3 other windows on that side of the house but they have blinds up and a tree outside, but the new window is higher up so tree doesn't cover it.

OP posts:
CurrySpice · 11/04/2011 13:05

I woldn't have moved it - you're nicer than me!

MissMarjoribanks · 11/04/2011 13:11

RueLaChesty - ah, I see, the Scottish system is different. I didn't realise they got the agent to send out neighbour notifications in Scotland. Ripe for abuse, imo! In England the Council sends out the notification. Apologies for describing it as bollocks.

Planning regulations for householders changed in October 2008. The rules for loft conversions are little altered from the previous regime actually. It has nothing to do with overlooking either, it's a volume calculation.

And house prices cannot be taken into account when considering whether something gets permission or not.

Original poster
DaydreamDollyisshrinking · 11/04/2011 13:14

Thanks Marjori - do you mean that there's little or no point complaining?

OP posts: