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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

wanting to have serious words in school about this teacher.

124 replies

Oakmaiden · 07/04/2011 21:02

My daughter was VERY upset today. She is 7 years old, and was asked by her teacher to draw and label a circuit diagram - basically a battery and bulb, led together with 4 crocodile clips. Now the teacher DID say to the class that they should only label one of the crocodile clips, because it would take to long to label them all.

My daughter chose to label them all - and claims she had still finished before most of the class.

Now - the teacher had specifically told them not to do this, so I completely understand her getting into trouble for not following instructions. But I feel the teacher's reaction was WAY over the top - she took my child's work and tore it up in front of the class and made her stay in all playtime to do it again.

Now - whilst I do understand that a reprimand was in order, and if she had had to simply stay in and redo the work I wouldn't have said a word. But really -is it ever acceptable to tear up a child's work? I just think it is so very rude and disrespectful - almost bullying actually. My daughter was devastated.

Beyond this - my daughter tells me that the teacher does this "a lot" - and it makes me really uncomfortable. They are only in Y2! I am really tempted to go in and speak to the head and see what the school policy is on this sort of thing...

Am I being too precious? I just think it is an unacceptable thing to do to any child, really....

OP posts:

StillSquiffy · 07/04/2011 22:35

My DS is in yr 2 and has done circuit diagrams.

Totally out of order, hope the teacher gets chewed up by the head.

EllenJane1 · 07/04/2011 22:36

YANBU. Basic rule that you don't publicly humiliate children, for any problem. Never, ever tear up their work! If you can corroborate this Definitely make your feelings known.

vegetariandumpling · 07/04/2011 22:37

I'll make it unanimous and say yanbu. Sounds like the teacher has anger issues if she's doing something as hotheaded as tearing up work

LoopyLoopsChupaChups · 07/04/2011 22:40

What everyone else said. YANBU.

Asinine · 07/04/2011 22:43

YANBU
Put it in writing and copy to head and governors. She is totally out of order and needs to be told.

Spinkle · 07/04/2011 22:44

You need to check it actually happened first.

Then go ape. This sort of action seriously undermines confidence in all children in the classroom.

Unprofessional and unnecessary.

vintageteacups · 07/04/2011 22:48

OP, do exactly what donnie says and if you get nowhere, write to the Chair of the Governors.

This is not how teachers are supposed to behave and she completely humiliated your dd.

So what if she did all the labels; perhaps she didn't understand the task, perhaps she had tuned out for a few minutes when it was being explained, or perhaps, she just thought she would label them all.

OP - a repromand was certain;y not in order. Your dd was not naughty; she merely did something extra to what was required. She is 7, in yr 2 for goodness sake.

It sounds as though she's regularly picking on your dd and who knows what other children and I'm surprised that nobody has yet reported her.

I would go mental if a teacher did this to my children's work.

berylmuspratt · 07/04/2011 22:49

What a bully. I'd speak to the teacher. YANBU.

vintageteacups · 07/04/2011 22:50

Saying that - are you sure your dd told you the events exactly as they happened? Are you sure the teacher didn't say she'd have to do another one and to put the first one in the recylcing or scrap paper drawer?

Could she have been tearing it for scrap paper?

AnnieLobeseder · 07/04/2011 22:52

When I was about 10 or 11 our art teacher asked us to do a self-portrait with our eyes shut. I did as she asked, most of the class cheated and squinted through their eyelashes etc to see.

She picked mine up, showed it to the class, laughed and told them how awful it was and tore it up in front of everyone.

I have never forgotten it. It was one of the most humiliating moments of my life.

Speak to the head, please.

Asinine · 07/04/2011 22:56

I know of a teacher who did this, who was complained about by a lot of parents. She then told the kids off for telling their parents. Next she confiscated a soft toy from a girl and jumped on it until it split in front of the class and said "tell your parents about that". A lot of the kids were disturbed by that. She basically was stressed and not coping. If this is true she may need help before thongs get better.

Original poster

Oakmaiden · 07/04/2011 22:58

vintage - I don't see why my daughter would have been so upset if it happened that way? Going to speak to my friend (who has a daughter in the same class) tomorrow, and see what her daughter remembers about it.

My daughter has said several times that her teacher gets angry a lot and shouts - in fact she recently asked if she could move up or down a year or move school so she could have a different teacher. It is a shame, because I have been wavering about moving her to a different school (which is closer/more academic and has an after school club which would save me £100+ a month), but have not done so because she has made such good friends at this school. I know she only has one term left in this class - but my son will be having this teacher next year too - and he has difficulty with his behaviour (being assessed for SEN) so it is likely to be even more difficult for him.

OP posts:

Original poster

Oakmaiden · 07/04/2011 22:59

Annie - what on Earth??? What a really weird thing for a teacher to do???

OP posts:

Asinine · 07/04/2011 23:01

The teacher I was thinking of started by shouting a lot. When we complained she said she was raising her voice, that the children were just being sensitive. But my other child could hear her from a different classroom

vintageteacups · 07/04/2011 23:01

Blimey - I would move them then. They will quickly adapt and make new friends and if it's not too far, you can still keep in touch and have play dates with their current friends.

This teacher sounds quite disturbed and should know that if she's not coping due to stress etc, that the children shoudl not bear the brunt of her emotions.

I would do something quickly before your dd starts refusing to go to school.

I wasn't meaning your dd wasn't telling the truth; simply that sometimes they retell it in a different way than it actually happened

Asinine · 07/04/2011 23:01

We knew it was true because so many kids reported it the same way.

vintageteacups · 07/04/2011 23:03

A good teacher can control a clas through whispers and very soft talking; she certainly doesn't need to shout and raise her voice constantly.

AnnieLobeseder · 07/04/2011 23:03

Oakmaiden - I know, she was quite disturbed. She committed suicide in front of her disabled son a few years later. Very sad. But she still cut me to shreds that day.

VodkawithRosie · 07/04/2011 23:05

I had an issue with a teacher at a previous school, my DS was 7 and I wasn't sure if I was getting all the truth. I thought as someone else has mentioned, that it couldn't possibly be happening as someone else would have mentioned something or complained.

Well, once I made a complaint (after speaking to the teacher and getting nowhere) I discovered that there had been 3 previous complaints over the same behaviour! I only discovered these through chance conversations as although we were all friendly as parents, the head has asked us individually not to mention it while nothing was done he sorted it out. The first complaint had been 4 months+ previously.

VodkawithRosie · 07/04/2011 23:05

oh YANBU btw

VodkawithRosie · 07/04/2011 23:07

I moved all mine too- I only wish I had done it sooner.

Original poster

Oakmaiden · 08/04/2011 08:52

Brief update: I have 'phoned the school, but the head is on a residential trip with Year 6, so I probably won't be able to speak to him until Monday. The secretary said if he comes into school this afternoon she will let him know, but suspects that he will go straight home.

I have also spoken to my friend, whose daughter is in my daughter's class. Her daughter has confirmed that my daughter worked hard on her circuit diagram but that it was torn up because she hadn't followed instructions (ie had written "crocodile clip" 4 times instead of just once). Even more disturbing, actually -apparently a couple of children in the lower ability group also had their work torn up and had to repeat it - because they had drawn the lines (from the labels to the diagram) too long!

Friends daughter also reports that she had accidentally turned 2 pages in her RE book before doing a piece of work yesterday, and when the teacher noticed she made her rub it all out and do it again (a whole page of work!)

Also, apparently last week there was a wet playtime and the girls asked the dinnerlady on duty if they could do some drawing. The dinner lady said OK and apparently they all worked really hard doing their drawings, but when the teacher got into the classroom she told them off as she doesn't like them drawing at wet play and threw all their pictures away.

Is it me, or is this teacher just really MEAN? They are only 7, ffs!!!

OP posts:

Becaroooo · 08/04/2011 08:58

YANBU...this teacher is dreadful.

Put it in writing, copy to the governors and if possible, get your child moved into another class.

LDNmummy · 08/04/2011 09:00

Wow! This teacher has some serious personal issue's and should not be teaching anyone's children. Actively humiliating a class of 7 year olds at every minor opportunity is indicative of something more than over discipline issues.

Bucharest · 08/04/2011 09:03

Definitely NBU.
(and I came on to say you were, as I do on most of these threads!!)
Teacher sounds like she enjoys humiliating the children tbh.

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