To think that some other mothers can be complete cows?

[crazycatlady]

Two isolated incidents this week have made me wonder why women are so damn MEAN.

1. I took toddler DD and 4wk old DS to a local cafe earlier this week - to get a smoothie as a reward for DD for being good at the bank and so I could sit and feed DS. The place was quite busy with babies and buggies. I couldn't get through to the only free table. Two mums were completely blocking the way with their buggies. They could see me struggling. I asked if I could get by and got a disgruntled 'oh, can't you manage?'. They stayed in their seats. I asked again if they could move their buggies and got a shouty 'no, can't you see we're BREASTFEEDING'. So I started to move one of their buggies so i could get by and got a 'don't move that, it's got things in it I need'. In the end I went somewhere else...

2. At the playground today another toddler pushed my DD over so hard she went flying and landed on her face. He was pushing her away from the swing she was getting into. His mother saw the whole thing but didn't pull her son up on his behaviour. Instead she laughed while my DD was getting hysterical. I asked her if she was going to ask her son to apologise and she said 'why? that's what 2yr olds do'. When I replied, 'yes but it's not really acceptable to let them get away with it', two or three other mothers joined in and told me I was being ridiculous. DD was so upset she asked to go in the buggy and go home from the playground which is unheard of. I was really surprised by the reaction of the other mothers.

So AIBU to be shocked at how horrid other mothers can be, or is this just what it's like in SAHM world and I need to toughen up? I am recently back on maternity leave so haven't had to endure playgrounds/playgroups etc for a long while...

Tanith that is nice. Thank you for sharing that story.

You know my overwhelming experience is that a lot of people (of all walks of life and, yes, even in south London) are pleasant and kind, perhaps that's why it's shocked me so much to encounter such blatant unkindness, especially from mums who I always assume will be friendlier and a little more aware of the needs of people around them. Lesson learned!

My DS pushed over my friends DS at a playgroup last week before I could grab him. There was a loud bang when his head hit the floor, he understandably started screaming, and every mother in the room looked at me as if I was satan!!! (except my friend who was fine about it) Obviously I then removed my DS and told him that was wrong etc as you should (he is 18months).
How can other mothers think this is ok behaviour? Yes they do this type of thing as they're young, but they need to learn. I told a boy of about 6 off in the playground the other day as he was sitting in the climbing frame tunnel so DS couldn't get through. I started nicely, but then had to get a bit forceful as he was just staring at me like I was mad. I admit I was a bit worried that he was going to tell his dad that the lady had just shouted at him but then I think I was in the right so was ready to stand up for myself!

Re: the pushchairs, all the cafes around here have the space issue (north london) but it's completely normal for someone to start shifting your pram so they can get through if you're not in a position to do it yourself. Precious mummies like yours OP wouldn't last two minutes!!!!

Blimey, had the mothers not learnt that breastfeeding can be interrupted for any number of activities, buggy moving included. Clearly they were not proficient in the ancient art of keeping a baby on the breast whilst leaning over or even crossing the room to fetch badly placed tv remote or phone. I'm sure that skill would transfer to buggy moving. If breastfeeding is to continue gaining acceptance I feel those doing it (have always included myself in that group) have to see patience with it as two way street of consideration. But they were just manky horrible women so no chance of that.

Ha this thread is making me rofl. I live in another part of SE London but go to Dulwich quite alot for my (older) dc's activities.

There is a small chance we could need to move to that area next year and I actually don't think I could face living (or prob afford tbh) amongst so many of the smug entitled variety.

I think I would have to be on the perhiphery (sp) in a more diverse area IYKWIM.

I thought we were in a 'diverse area' sincity... well, actually we are, it's Streatham but perhaps the smugness is infiltrating!

sorry ccl I didn't mean Streatham - have lived there too and think it's pretty diverse.