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AIBU?

To consider dumping this very lovely, intelligent, and hot, man because he persists in calling me 'baby'

83 replies

PainteditRed · 06/04/2011 14:51

It just makes me cringe. I have told him I don't like it.

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PainteditRed · 06/04/2011 17:34

the random 'here's wha happeed today makes me think the babe is just ill thought out, argh I don't know

somebody please tell me what to do ;)

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thesnowmanleft · 06/04/2011 17:35

VOM.IT. no way would I be in any way, shape or form having anything to do with the creator of that text.

Yuk! Baby bum - YUK!! Lie with you for eternity... sick. ewwww. This si revolting.

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ViolaTricolor · 06/04/2011 17:40

Urgh, the text would put me right off, especially pre-sex. What might he say while you're actually doing it?

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hedgefundwidow · 06/04/2011 17:41

call him your little dough boy and see if he likes it!

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IslaValargeone · 06/04/2011 17:47

Oh Dear God, that text is awful.
I once dumped a guy after first day because he turned up in white loafers!!

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0891 · 06/04/2011 17:51

Baby, said occasionally and with a bit of ooompfh can be melt-making. Esp in DP's Irish accent.

Baby bum and the rest of that text is nauseating and indicative of a man who infantilises women. I don't think you can train him out of it, it sounds like an intrinsic part of his banter.

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cheekeymonkey · 06/04/2011 17:51

Jesus, white loafers!!!!!

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hissymissy · 06/04/2011 17:54

OP, there are literally thousands of lonely women out there who would love to date a "lovely, intelligent, and hot, man". By all means, dump him so he can go out and find a lovely intelligent hot woman who doesn't give a shit what pet name he gives her, as long as he treats her right.

I would love to be with someone lovely who called me baby. I would love to be with someone, full stop. YABU.

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cheekeymonkey · 06/04/2011 17:55

The time to worry is when he is calling you by someone else's name

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Chil1234 · 06/04/2011 17:59

Actually, I think I've got it. If he keeps to the nickname 'baby' he then doesn't have to remember which woman he's with.... you see? :) So that means he's a) lazy as well as b) patronising and probably c) someone with a few on the go at once!

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BertieBotts · 06/04/2011 18:01

I agree with your friend - sounds like you just don't really want a relationship at the moment. But that's fine - it's fun being single as well :)

On the pet name issue, if you've told him you don't like it he should respect that and not use it (or try not to if it's a habit). But honestly if you liked him that much it wouldn't be such an issue.

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2rebecca · 06/04/2011 18:02

I think someone persisting in calling you a name you have told him you dislike is either selfish and controlling or stupid.
You say he is intelligent but why would an intelligent person do this unless he believed that your opinion in this matter was irrelevent in which case he's a control freak.
If you otherwise like him I would make it clear to him that if he doesn't stop calling you a nickname you hate then the relationship is over as he has no consideration for your opinions and feelings.
The text makes him sound like a horny 15 year old though, a bit yukky and immature.

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hissymissy · 06/04/2011 18:02

Tosh! It's a pet name, just like hun, love, sweetheart, chicken or darling. I like pet names. It does not mean someone is a cheating philanderer.

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Numberfour · 06/04/2011 18:04

This thread has me LOLLING !!! wa ha ha ha ha!!

DH occasionally calls me...... mate! I kid you not - along the lines of "Cheers, Mate, see ya later!" Ha ha ha ha ha!!

OP, that text is a gazillion billion times worse than being called Baby. Yuck! Vomit! Puke!

RUN!!

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hissymissy · 06/04/2011 18:05

Mind you, "baby bum" and the rest of that text is is pushing it.

I guess it depends how much he compensates this in other ways.

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supersalstrawberry · 06/04/2011 18:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PainteditRed · 06/04/2011 18:22

'lie with you for eternity' did remind me of my grans funeral actually

But he is very hot (winces, aplogises)

and I do need a shag

but I think with him it'd never be just a shag...

hey ho

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PainteditRed · 06/04/2011 18:25

white loafers...weeping here

Actually he is divorced, and tells me his wife was 'controlling', to the point that she had 3 affairs.

Now mumsnet jury he wants to take me out tonight, walk my dog and maybe some food
. I'm torn.

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SpringchickenGoldBrass · 06/04/2011 18:26

The text made me a bit queasy, but at the same time quite a lot of people send appallingly embarassing but well-meant texts to one another.
PiR I would seriously suggest binning this one off, You don't want to shag him or you would have done it by now, and there's something about him that is putting you off. NSA playmates are people you just jump and move on, if you;ve been dating but can;t bring ourself to jump him then he;s not suitable for that role but you don;t want him as a longterm partne either.

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PainteditRed · 06/04/2011 18:36

Oh thankyou for putting my thoughts into words.

As we've done the few dates thing I thought maybe we ought to. He's physically very attractive, but there's a little snag.

There's the 23 year old student i met at a dinner party, spent all weekend in bed with and will no doubt never see again as my benchmark.

No point ding the longterm if there's no instant.

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PainteditRed · 06/04/2011 18:38

SGB I'd like a private dicussion with you too, if you'd oblige? 6 year mumsnetter here, got a couple that I am so ready to have fun with

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IslaValargeone · 06/04/2011 19:57

Ah, thanks heavens for the vindication over 'loafergate' I have harboured years of guilt over such shallow actions, but there has to be a line.

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AliSheedy · 06/04/2011 20:37

'Baby bum' man sounds a proper Charlie.

Moving swiftly on....did you get the hot 23 yr old student's number?

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SpringchickenGoldBrass · 06/04/2011 23:44

PiR you're welcome to PM me if you like.

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nijinsky · 06/04/2011 23:56

I wonder how many times he's used that very text?

Sings:- "Don't call me baby. You've got another baby that'll never do. You know I don't belong to you..."

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