to use the disabled toilet in this situation?

[dolldaggabuzzbuzz]

I took mine and my sister's DCs for a nice day out to the cinema. There was just me and 4 kids aged between 3 and 5. After we bought our tickets I took them to the Ladies toilet, they were all engaged and there were a few people waiting.

I decided not to wait and took the DCs out to the disabled toilet as there was no one using or waiting for it. When we had all finished we were washing our hands when someone tried the door, one of the DCs had unlocked it and this woman in a wheelchair came in with her partner, I said I won't be a minute. She glared at me and muttered some things.

I was really embarrassed that I had been caught out using the disabled toilet and I wanted to apologise to the lady for keeping her waiting (for less than a minute!) but she was really, really angry. The DCs ran out in opposite directions and I quickly said sorry to the lady and as I walked off she screamed "Bitch!" at me. I never turned back to look at her. I don't think the DCs noticed anything!

I was so upset I couldn't get it out of my head throughout the film, and it ruined my day. I don't think what I did was that bad. I thought that woman was really horrible. AIBU?

MrSpoctbh I don't carebut I detest the jealousy and sense of entitlement able bodied people with able bodied kids have over some thing that is supposed to be for non able bodied people.

What about people who are disabled as a result of a lifestyle choice (Eg strokes caused by smoking or drinking, type 1 diabetes, the late Christopher Reeve). Should people disabled by random chance get precedence? What about people who are only in a wheelchair temporarily?

Erm- Type 1 (insulin dependent) diabetes is not a lifestyle choice, and neither is type 2 really. People with type 1 very often have other health issues, such as visual impairement (as my DP does) and are, therefore, disabled. So you can't put them in the naughty section!

Surley the disabled toliet is just a larger toliet designed to enable wheelchair users access should they need it... not some sort of exclusive 'club'?

A large department store near me only has disabled toliets...should we not be using them then?

OP - YADNBU.

RunnerHasBeen "To be honest, I would not use the disabled toilet unless I had to but I do consider someone able bodied who has a tummy bug, for example, or even who is just really desperate, to be in at least as much need as me. I don't consider the arbitrary medical classification as disabled to be as polarising as it is being implied here. Disability has a relative element, and in this case is revolves around the ability to use the normal toilet and the ability to wait in the queue (two separate problems). I really can't see why a condition that makes me unable to wait gives me priority over someone else who can't wait for whatever reason."

Very well put. Who hasn't suffered the occasional bout of gastro-enteritis or food poisoning? Or broken a bone in their leg or foot (or in my case snapped their achilles tendon) and found it temporarily difficult to get about?

That's quite alright, Fanjo. If I'm going to be abused, I must insist people abuse me for the right thing.

I'm not really an arse by the way. I'm actually quite lovely. I just have a different belief in the utility of disabled toilets to you. I haven't been abusive at all but for holding a different view to you on some relatively minor aspect of social convention you swear at me and try to belittle me by implying I'm nought but a half-term troll.

Good job I'm thick skinned!

MissVerinder "Erm- Type 1 (insulin dependent) diabetes is not a lifestyle choice, and neither is type 2 really. People with type 1 very often have other health issues, such as visual impairement (as my DP does)"

Not sure I entirely agree. My father's was certainly brought on by lifestyle choice.

Shoesytwoesy - but the point is that it is NOT just for disabled people. It is for everyone. Same as 90% of disabled people can use normal toilets. She they be banned?

altinkum Thank you, sorry if I used the term able bodied, I didn't know what else to say. I feel the same way - I only have problems in very specific situations, and at certain times (if my arthritis is playing up). The rest of the time I consider myself able to do pretty much anything, including wait in a queue - I almost feel lucky to, so don't mind at all. I also remember how bad it was before my UC or arthritis was diagnosed when I needed to use toilets or take lifts, but felt ridiculously guilty doing so thinking I just had a bug or injury. I now feel stupid for feeling that way as the need was exactly the same.

Altinkum- still confused why you are rambling on about hidden disabilities- the OP stated quite clearly she cba to wait and apologised to the lady- do you not think she KNEW from that the OP wasnt disabled and used the disabled loo because it suited?
Just one point I would like you to answer but im sure you will gloss over!

YANBU. I use disabled toilets all the time if I am on my own with a pram, and shall continue to do so. How rude of that woman to call you a name. I would have called her something worse right back.

Gemsy83 - Oh dear, The op had every right to use it and should not feel the need to appologise. These toilets are for everyone but are designed to make it easier for disabled people to use.
The point about hidden disabilities is that just because someone is not in a wheel chair does not mean they dont have a disablility, so do not judge.

Well Sierra you are a grade A moron- have a medal dear!

MrSpoc where did you get the 90% from?

The point about hidden disabilities is that just because someone is not in a wheel chair does not mean they dont have a disablility, so do not judge

Of course- but how is that relevent to the OP? Dont 'oh dear' me, I would appreciate somebody to answer this seeings as people keep totally missing the point, i.e it is not relevent as the OP had no need to use it and even apologised for doing so

Hi Sierra - ignore Gemsy. The rest of us are trying to.

Is there such a facility as a Mother and Baby only toilet/changing room/cubicle?

If so would the Mother mind waiting outside the door whislt the wheelchair user was in occupation?
Just a thought..

If they were for everyone do you not think they may be called 'for everyone but designed to make life easier for disabled people' toilets? As they aren't maybe the clue is in the name?

Don't 'oh dear me'. You 'dear'ed Sierra!

Hypocrite much?

Yes Bristol- you ignore anyone who makes a valid point and doesnt go along with your nonsensical bullshit way of life...are you a politician perhaps?

BJ (very apt name) thought you were ignoring me? Or is that purely a attempt to have the last say kind of ignoring?

i wouldnt leave the house if i had the shits

Male toilets are for males
Female toilets are for females
Disable toilets are for the disabled
If women where to use the mens, most of the men would be upset.
If men where to use the females there would be an outcry by the women and cries of pervert.
If non-disabled people where to use the disabled toilets the disabled have to put up and shut up.
Gotta love equality!!!