to use the disabled toilet in this situation?

[dolldaggabuzzbuzz]

I took mine and my sister's DCs for a nice day out to the cinema. There was just me and 4 kids aged between 3 and 5. After we bought our tickets I took them to the Ladies toilet, they were all engaged and there were a few people waiting.

I decided not to wait and took the DCs out to the disabled toilet as there was no one using or waiting for it. When we had all finished we were washing our hands when someone tried the door, one of the DCs had unlocked it and this woman in a wheelchair came in with her partner, I said I won't be a minute. She glared at me and muttered some things.

I was really embarrassed that I had been caught out using the disabled toilet and I wanted to apologise to the lady for keeping her waiting (for less than a minute!) but she was really, really angry. The DCs ran out in opposite directions and I quickly said sorry to the lady and as I walked off she screamed "Bitch!" at me. I never turned back to look at her. I don't think the DCs noticed anything!

I was so upset I couldn't get it out of my head throughout the film, and it ruined my day. I don't think what I did was that bad. I thought that woman was really horrible. AIBU?

ive never once thought of asthma as a disability. is eczema one too

yep, she was right, she was a bitch.

and it is usually where they put the nappy change area too. dd/ds get distressed if they are left outside a cubicle while I pee.

DingDong - i think you have to apply for a key and pay a few quid. im not sure tho. i know i havent been issued one and have 2 kids with SN/disabilities

Gemsy, the second you resort to personal digs you lose the argument.

Tatty bye xx

Gemsy83 you say "disabled people shouldnt have to wait in a queue because of the buggy pusher brigade who think they 'need' a specific cubicle.."

I'm saying people should go to the front if they have a need to. You are saying they should have exclusive access because they are disabled even if their disability doesn't affect them using a toilet.

Why? because they are better people? more worthy?

Certainly it sounds like you think they are more worthy than people who have children. "the buggy pusher brigade"?

It seems to be a case of deeply held prejudice in your case rather than rational opinion.

Why the Radar Key? quoted from the Radar Web Site

The National Key Scheme (NKS) offers independent access to disabled people to around 7,000 locked public toilets around the country. RADAR would like all providers of accessible toilets to keep their toilets unlocked if at all possible. The NKS is suggested for use only if the provider concerned has to keep the toilets locked to stop vandalism and misuse.

Note the last word!!

Also on application you state the following.

"I declare that I/the individual name above is chronically sick or has a disabling condition and is eligible to claim VAT relief for disabled people. The key for accessible toilets being ordered is for my/their domestic and personal use only".

Ok, I really think it is getting out of control. If the mentality "every man for himself" or whatever is so prevailing on this thread, why don't you all also accept NO child benefit, NO disability benefit, NO any other kind of benefits. We all pay much smaller taxes for upkeep of the army only (maybe not even this), make our own life much more comfortable and all these "deserving" - disabled, children with special needs etc, single mothers escaping dv can just go and topple themselves cos no-one cares.

Great society you are going to build.

Thanks Dingdong - I am now annoyingly singing dingdong merrily on high in my head

slightlymad72 - can you point us to the relivant legislation that says disabled toilets are for sole use to wheel chair users. thanks.

There are many public places that have disabled toilets and lets you use them even if you are not disabled. It is down to the indervidual establishment if the choose to let you.

For example I know Trafford Centre will unlock their toilets for people with buggies (Shock Horror)
Magna Building Services
Plus Tesco's, Asda, Boots (Weirdly have a disbaled toilet with a baby toilet and brest feeding room all in one - also in trafford centre).

altinkum one without a disability cannot appreciate to what extend disabled loo access is abused. I myself was sometimes using it long time ago (because of long queues at ladies) but I appreciated the stress that it causes to disabled only ones my dh became one and I got a few disabled friends.

i really think people with children should be more considerate

There is no law against using disabled toilets. If there is no sign saying that the toilets are exclusively for use by disabled customers then you are not in breach of store policy either.

Similarly with parking. If a car park is full but for a disabled space, unless it is made clear that the space is exclusively for use by blue badge holders, I'll use it.

If you want to operate according to some other sort of moral code and not use them, good luck to you but I'm perfectly within my legal and consumer rights to use them and I'll continue to do so thank you very much. I'm not going to piss in the sink or drive back home again when there is a perfectly good toilet or parking space going unused.

And all this talk about mothers with children not being allowed to use them. Jesus, what piffle.

Is not the real crime that disabled people are expected to be ushered into a separate toilet rather than expecting that all toilets be disabled friendly? Imagine if rather than buses being updated to allow disabled people easy access, they came up with special disabled buses. Mind you, I'd probably use those too.

I was pointing out that the radar key exists because of misuse. Using them because you can't be arsed waiting is misuse.

faints at BristolJim saying something she agrees with

op yabu and shouldn't have used it.
can't be arsed to read the thread as having kids on it's own is not a disability, so unless it is a disabled/baby changing room, you should leave it for people with disabilities.

We have disabled access buses, pretty good, if they are filled with pushchairs and the wheelchair can't get on, then the buggies either have to be collapsed and you hold your child or you get off.

BristolJim you must have had some really tough time in the past to have so much bitterness lighten up.

As i have stated in anoher post here within this thread - my son is severly disabled. We do not have a blue badge or a radar key. We lived without them for 12 years. My son is entitled but we do not NEED them

Maybe the woman in the wheelchair had Tourettes or some kind of neurological issue.

altinkum the disabled lady in OP was totally out of order, no doubt. we also carry blue badge copy with us, because my dh is 6f4i, looks very fit and healthy and it is only noticeable he is disabled when he walks. but he was in coma iwth brain damage for 3 weeks, in full time rehab for 1.5 years and cannot function normally under stress, apart from having mobility issues. some wheel chair user also raise eyebrows at us when we walk out of the loo (i need to help him with his routine)

They are accessible toilets not restricted toilets

I had SPD in pregnancy that got so bad that at times I literally had to crawl about the house on my hands and knees. I wouldn't have qualified for a blue badge yadda but I still used disabled parking and toilets. So shoot me.