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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that it is not particularly healthy to "promote" being plus size?

303 replies

MaterTheGreater · 22/03/2011 15:55

I'm sure this discussion's been done, so no yawns please, but on Radio 2 this afternoon they were talking about the story in the news that 1 in 4 items sold in women's clothing are a size 18 or over.

They were saying that this was great and that Adele was a great role model for women.

Now I agree that they shouldn't be sending size zero models down the catwalk, and I think it's great that some designers are using something like a size 14, but I really don't think it's in any woman's best interest to think that a size 18 is a good thing.

I love Adele - she has an amazing voice, and comes across as a lovely girl, but she is definitely "overweight", and healthwise that can never be a good thing.

I know that obviously if you are taller with a bigger frame, then you need a bigger size, but I think even at 5'11" (which a good friend of mine is), an 18 would still be overweight.

I am 5'8" and a size 18 on the top half and 16 on the bottom and I am totally miserable. I am constantly worried about my health and the effect that my weight has on it. I am currently trying to shed the pounds, which is hard, but I really do not want to be this size - it's disgusting and unhealthy and I hate all the "big is beautiful" bollocks.

OP posts:
worraliberty · 26/03/2011 16:22

Some people just don't see fat because they've forgotten what thin is.

I know so many overweight people who compare themselves to other more overweight people...and then convince themselves that as they're not as overweight as them, they're not actually fat.

I'm also often amazed at how many people make a cat's bum face because they can see someone's ribs?? You're supposed to see ribs...they are on the least fattiest part of the body. The same as hip bones..you're supposed to see them too on most people (depending on shape) Yet the mere sight of these bones has people tutting and screaming eating disorder?

Someone on MN said the other week, she thought Dawn French was amazing and refused to believe she's morbidly obese...yet the woman can hardly walk Confused

toastedteacake · 26/03/2011 17:24

GotArt I agree with you. There is no excuse for over eating and blaming a 'thyroid condition' for your excess weight. It puts those with the actual disease in a 'bad light'.

However, many truly hypothyroid people consume far less than the recommended calorie intake and still gain weight as their metabolism has slowed down to the point where the body thinks it is in starvation mode and conserves all energy. These people are most probably being undermedicated by inexperienced/ ignorant doctors who 'treat by numbers', which is appalling.

Once again can I please refer all those who do not understand the mechanisms of thyroid disease to Thyroid Patient Advocacy, where there is a wealth of information and those who run the charity are extremely knowledgable and supportive.

Please do not 'bash' those with hypothyroidism or try to pigeon-hole them. It can be a miserable disease.

Nailitorelse · 26/03/2011 17:44

Quite honestly I think that Gok should be shot! As far as I am concerned it is people like him that make being oversized acceptable - it simply is NOT. It is bad for personal health and the economy. The only people who benefit are the food retailers!

My DH says that supermarkets should have two entrances - one for fat people above a certain size and one for thin people.
He says that a responsible supermarket would then not allow "Fat" people (who could not get in the "Thin" entrance) to buy food which had a high calorific value and would limit the total amount of food which they could buy, so that they had to use up more energy by having to go shopping more frequently!!
He also reckons that the fatties should be made to park the furthest distance away from the entrance so that they have to walk further as well!!

I know its not PC but something has got to be done!

Spinkle · 26/03/2011 19:03

I'm not reading the whole thread but I will say this. I'm a size 24. I have run 2 marathons at that size.

Am I unhealthy?

Can we not just accept different body shapes and sizes without jumping to conclusions?

Do you have to be made to feel like shit because your arse is huge?

worraliberty · 26/03/2011 19:09

How do we know if you're healthy or not?

Just because you ran 2 marathons, doesn't mean your internal organs aren't being damaged by being overweight or that you're not going to get diabetes.

The only person who can answer that is your Doctor and even then, only after a full medical.

GotArt · 26/03/2011 19:47

toastedtea Yes, I understand the starvation mode dilemma... your body harbours fat because that is its defense mechanism to combat not enough constant calories coming in. Anyone diagnosed with a thyroid condition should really go see a naturopath/ nutritionist that deals with it specially. They can help immensely and narrow in what your body needs. I did that with my hyperthyroidism because I am unable to take any of the medication and refuse to have the gland removed in case I cannot take the replacement medication, which would be for the rest of my life. I get tested every 6 months to ensure my levels are within the manageable range. I sweat all the time though, which is gross and irritating.

Nail I'm with ya with Gok. I understand he is trying to help women love themselves but it seems many of them have more issues around self-loathing than just their weight. They need a little more than just a bloody makeover. I like the little blond woman that really gets to the crux of what unhealthy lifestyles can do. Can't remember her name. Its also a crass, and I'm sure you'll get a bit of a flaming about it, but Grin at your DH. And don't forget about the other benefactors of the overweight phenomenon in western culture; funeral directors. Costs for caskets and cremation have gone up too.

Spinkle What was your time on your marathons?

Ormirian · 26/03/2011 19:56

Ooh dear. There are some nasty attitudes masquerading as concern on this thread.

bibbitybobbityhat · 26/03/2011 20:01

How many have a nasty attitude?

I think most are sensitive, understanding, accepting ... and yet not in agreement that its actually a positive thing to be a size 16/18/20/22 whatever.

Ormirian · 26/03/2011 20:10

Read the post by nailitoreise and tell me that isn't sheer nastiness on the part of her dh

Is it a good thing that people are fatter? No. Would it be better if the people who are overweight were made even more miserable about it? No. We mY look at 'role models' who are big and think they look ok, but the unrelenting opposite pressure to be skinny won't honestly let many women feel complacent for long. Don't worry, you can be sure the sense of inadequacy and guilt will return soon enough Hmm

And FFS, if running a marathon isn't proof of fitness, we might as well give up...

Bunbaker · 26/03/2011 20:18

My sister is a size 24 and morbidly obese. She also has diabetes and is pretty unhealthy.

spiderslegs · 26/03/2011 20:26

Right - haven't read the whole thread but, could we please lay off the health fascism, some people are (I think) quite happy being a larger size & some people aren't. Those who aren't, then, do something about it, those who are please, everyone, leave them alone. I mean, really, does it impinge upon your life so horribly that the woman down the road stuffs her face with cream buns & seems perfectly happy with the results?????

Why on earth should you care?

FWIT's worth, I'm 5' 8" & 9 1/2 stone so to you naysayers would probably be perfectly socially acceptable, I do, howEver, smoke & drink a lot of wine so am probably horribly rotten inside.

And really, those of us with unhealthy habits that seem to cause some of you such pain are are, in actuarial terms, doing you a favour, as we will probably pop our clogs at a sensible age & won't be lingering on for years draining all your precious resources......

NotaMopsa · 26/03/2011 20:32

I constantly get asked why I watch my weight
I also get 'don't lose any more weight'
last week someone asked me
'why i wanted to be thin' Confused

BulletWithAName · 26/03/2011 21:52

Arrrgggh yes, I'm with you on Gok GotArt and Nailitorelse, he winds me up when he says to a clearly apple shaped woman 'Oh look at you with your hourglss figure', when all he's done is slapped a shit load of corseted underwear under a nipped waist dress and a fuck off cinch belt to suck it all in!

smartyparts · 26/03/2011 22:03

I think Gok is a mendacious twit

spiderslegs · 26/03/2011 22:17

'mendacious twit' ha ha ha ha - love it

GotArt · 27/03/2011 02:03

"as we will probably pop our clogs at a sensible age & won't be lingering on for years draining all your precious resources......" Actually, the complete opposite is true. If you don't care about being healthy and exercising and prefer to stuff yourself and strain the healthcare system, pay for your care yourself.

spiderslegs · 27/03/2011 02:09

Mmmm - GotArt - I do, thrice,

a) Through taxes

b) Through additional taxes I pay on my cigarettes & wine

c) Through private healthcare

GotArt · 27/03/2011 02:15

You pay a portion, not the full amount of what you will be using.

spiderslegs · 27/03/2011 02:17

& Jeysus Christ, being healthy is not a moral fucking imperative, last time I looked we were independent human beings with volition, not Brave New World building blocks of society.....

differentnameforthis · 27/03/2011 02:20

I think we do too much "big is beautiful". I don't think you could be a size 22 plus and have a healthy

Is this a 'big is beautiful' issue, or a 'big is unhealthy' issue?

Because people can find you beautiful if you are big, and you can feel beautiful when you are big.

I agree to an extent that big isn't/can't be healthy, but that doesn't mean you aren't/can't be/won't be seen as beautiful when you are bigger.

spiderslegs · 27/03/2011 02:30

GotArt believe me - I pay more than enough, & really, what a horrible consequence of the welfare state if only those deemed morally pure may benefit.....

GotArt · 27/03/2011 02:30

I think some people use the big is beautiful mentality to let themselves 'go'. I used to say Rubenesque about myself.

GotArt · 27/03/2011 02:34

Its the same for smokers. If you develop a disease caused by your smoking and do not make the appropriate changes, like quitting smoking, why the hell should I pay for your healthcare?

spiderslegs · 27/03/2011 02:38

Mmmm, because we've already paid for it by the tax on our cigarettes??

GotArt · 27/03/2011 02:41

Then why is my healthcare rising rapidly? I'm being told by the government that it is because of the increase in obesity related diseases.