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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Documenting New babys every move on Facebook

32 replies

redruby · 14/03/2011 10:24

Dear Mumsnetters
The past few weeks I have been struggling to get my head around New Mums who write about their new babys and what they are up to e.g. "he doesnt like banana!" "He has lost his favourite toy!" "She slept for 6 hours last night!" several times a day on Facebook.

I am a new Mum, well 6 months in, and have used Facebook to upload a couple of albums about DS.

Like all new Mums I am incredibly proud and amazed by this new little creature, and find the things he does just fascinating. I also feel sometimes like I am the first woman in the worlds to feel this way! And this is the first little boy to do all these amazing things! And I enjoy all these moments with DS, on my own, and with my DH and friends.
But I have not been inclined to document them all on FB via my newsfeed. And I have two friends who are doing this, ALL THE TIME, and I am thinking 'why'? What is this telling us about being a Mother these days? Where do they get the energy from to go on FB several times a day? Why do this?? Do you have any thoughts on it? Do you find it perplexing (as I do) or even irritating / boring (as one of my friends does) ???

OP posts:

MotherNight · 14/03/2011 10:26

Maybe they're lonely? And they're whole world has been taken over by this little creature, they no longer have a social life, they may have given up work..
I don't do it but meh.

PorkChopSter · 14/03/2011 10:26

Perhaps they haven't spoken to another adult since 7am?

Perhaps they cannot understand why anyone would not be fascinated by the bowel movements of their PFB?

There is a Hide from your newsfeed option - use it

BellaBearisWideAwake · 14/03/2011 10:28

It's not so energetic when you have it on your phone! And I agree - use the hide function

MamaLazarou · 14/03/2011 10:30

YANBU but just hide them from your news feed if it annoys you.

Ozziegirly · 14/03/2011 10:33

They are probably excited and thrilled about their new child and imagine that everyone feels the same, as suddenly their whole world has changed and they don't realise that everyone else's hasn't.

I would suggest either hiding news feed or trying to feel happy for them.

butterpieify · 14/03/2011 10:38

I often go several days at a time with a total of less than half an hour talking to real adults who aren't my DH. My kids are my "job" (or at least part of it, but my paid work is home based too) - I see chatting on mn and fb about them as the same as the banter that goes on at any workplace. I like to share what is going on with my friends, they are often doing the exact same thing, or they have older kids and can advise, or they don't have kids and love to hear about mine.

Some people probably aren't that interested, but then I'm not overly interested in their nightlife. I still like having it in my newsfeed though - I love the little windows into day to day life that fb gives.

Original poster

redruby · 14/03/2011 10:38

Yes I will try the hide function if it gets annoying. I have been thinking they might be lonely / have not spoken to another person but baby since 7am, I know that feeling. But then some of the posts I know other Mums interpret as quite competitive especially the ones about sleep. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

OP posts:

FreudianSlippery · 14/03/2011 10:44

I think it's harmless unless it gets competitive, and it's easily ignored.

I tend not to update about my DCs unless they say or do something funny/embarrassing!

Awhiteelephantintheroom · 14/03/2011 10:44

I know someone like that; unfortunately she was like it during the pregnancy too and we were all subjected to three times weekly bump photos etc. Boring!

Bumperlicious · 14/03/2011 10:55

Well, I loathe FB but I must admit that my iphone means I can send pictures and videos of my DD's all the time, but I only generally do it to my mum and she LOVES it! 'Look DD2 is eating cucumber' and yesterday it was 'Look DD1 wrote her name for the first time' snap with the camera and send. Happy Grandma!

roomonthebroom · 14/03/2011 11:06

I have a FB friend (ex-colleague) who does this with her PFB. I think she probably is a bit lonely and i think she is 'over-cheerful' which may be her was of coping with the demands of the baby, so I do engage with her- don't see the harm. She does seem to believe that she is the only person to have had a baby and the only person to successfully breastfeed which can be irritating, but so what. If it begins to annoy me I can hide the posts- you can too so YABU.

What I do find a bit disconcerting is the 'conversations' she has with the baby who has its own facebook page, and had one pre birth too, where she posted the thoughts of the baby. That is plain wrong!

Chil1234 · 14/03/2011 11:07

I don't actually know why people feel the urge to document the minutiae of their life at all on Facebook, Twitter, blogs etc.... baby or no baby. And I wonder when they get time to do anything when they're so busy posting messages. If the networks all shut down, would they cease to exist?....

Firawla · 14/03/2011 11:12

I dont mind it, if you dont like it just ignore. i wouldnt do it myself but does not bother me when others do, maybe they are just v proud of their baby and this is their personal way of expressing it

Ephiny · 14/03/2011 11:19

"What I do find a bit disconcerting is the 'conversations' she has with the baby who has its own facebook page, and had one pre birth too, where she posted the thoughts of the baby. That is plain wrong!"

That's up there with the people who send Christmas/birthday cards to themselves 'from' their dog or cat.

People are weird sometimes though. I would just and ignore/hide the posts, I do find it perplexing but it's not harming anyone.

Psammead · 14/03/2011 11:20

I expect I annoy some friends on FB with lots of pics of PFB. I do it because my family live in another country and emailed pics and FB ones are all they see of DD. I don't do the updates thing because I phone a lot, but if we couldn't afford the phone calls I would.

Katiepoes · 14/03/2011 11:21

I post photos of my baby a 2-3 times a week. Friends and family I don't see often seem to like it, and it's certainly no more irritiating than Farmville updates. Or 'X has checked in at .." posts. Or the 'almost Friday/yay it's Friday' posts. Block the feed if you don't like it.

olivertulliver · 14/03/2011 11:21

Comment on FB 'Over sharing!' or 'nobody cares!'.

Then hide.

NinkyNonker · 14/03/2011 11:33

Oh give them a break, they're excited or whatever. I am not that into FB, but really, stop being such a bah humbug.

But to a baby's own profile...

CherryPie3 · 14/03/2011 11:40

I do this all the time. I don't care if it annoys anyone to be quite frank. I too have the iPhone and it takes all of 20seconds to post a status update/photo etc.

I have a fair few friends that do not live close by and they do the same with their children. I also have a lot of the ladies from my ante-natal group and all babies are the age so it's nice to see how each if us is getting in.

YABU in my opinion.

SilveryMoon · 14/03/2011 11:40

I love it! I love to read and see what other people's dc's are up to!

CherryPie3 · 14/03/2011 11:41

*same age

FoxyRevenger · 14/03/2011 11:43

The baby having their own page is insane.

But, otherwise, what's the harm? I am on maternity leave just now and it's a quick easy way to connect with lots of my friends whilst the baby is sleeping.

I don't really understand why people get arsey about this stuff - just don't read the posts/look at the photos/whatever.

CountBapula · 14/03/2011 11:55

I do know someone who pretty much every day updates how long her baby slept for the previous night, eg 'so proud of my DC for doing 7.30pm til 7.30am' - it is a bit daft but then I am just because my DS is such a rubbish sleeper - I am more likely to post a status update moaning about how little sleep I've had!

I do post a lot of photos though (especially now I have the instagram app on my iphone) because he may be an insomniac but he's bloody cute .

HipHopopotomus · 14/03/2011 12:11

I've had to 'hide' someone who was like this - just wayyyyyy tooo annoying. I post photos but I live a long way away from many family & friends.

redexpat · 14/03/2011 12:24

YANBU. It's really boring and naff. I have hidden all but 2 of my new mother friends from my newsfeed. The remaining 2 give funny, interesting and OCCASIONAL updates of family life which I love.

I think they may do it because they are at home and bored and lonely, and FB gives them some kind of contact.

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