MN jury required on whether I am a prude

[SenoritaViva]

This morning DH and DD (3 almost 4) are sitting up in bed. I am getting dressed. Take top off, this is the discussion:

DH 'Mummy has fantastic boobies, DD say Mummy has fantastic boobies, go on say Mummy has fantastic boobies'

I ask him to stop doing that, he thinks I am a prude, I think it is a bit strange!

Don't have problem with DD seeing me naked (nor DH obviously!) and this is not a case of being worried this will turn DD into a lesbian, if she's gay she's gay. Also didn't have problem with DH eyeing me up and making faces behind DD, fine and amusing. But I just didn't want him to include DD in this. Secondly, was concerned she'd go to school chanting 'My mummy has fantastic boobies'. Albeit amusing, somewhat embarrassing for me.

This is not some ball breaker argument, I'd just like to know whether I have lost my sense of humour and being prudish, or whether like me, you think it a bit odd.

For me it is about intent, he meant it in a sexual manner and therefore it is off limits. He could have made a different comment about the op's bobbies with no sexual intent/inference and that would have been fine (well apart from the fact I also dislike using children to parrot like this but that is a side issue!)

No, you're not a prude, your dh was misguided at best.

You are unreasonable to have fantastic breasts though, mine are far far far from that

YANBU nip it in the bud. I now have a DD who thinks it hilarious to copy what daddy did and jiggle mummys boobs

I'm not a prude and I think YADNBU. V inappropriate thing to put into a kid's head and yes, what if she repeats it to friends/other adults/at school? Really odd. Imagine it happening the other way round e.g. DS instead of DD and you get him to say 'Daddy has a huge willy' ... Sounds pretty weird, no?

*My dh taught my toddler ds to say "Yum, yum, nice bum"

I didn't (and don't) think that was sexualisation: it was about being comfortable in our bodies.

BTW: ds is now 10 and is going through the (totally normal) stage of disliking/being by embarassed by seeing boobs and people kissing on TV (along with a general dislike of all thngs "girlie").*

I could've written Prettybird's post word for word :)

Hmmm bold didn't work!

YEs but would you have felt the same if they had been taught "yum yum, nice Tits"??

YANBU or a prude, ok for DH to say it, but to tell DC to say it is odd.

But OP's dh didn't say 'nice tits' - he said 'boobies' which is pretty tame in my book, along with the word 'bum.'

It sounds like it was said in a light hearted manner in the same way that my dh says 'Ooooo tell mummy she has pretty hair' when I come back from the hairdresser's.

Ok, "yum yum, nice boobies"

Still has a sexual turn to it that "nice bum" doesn't IMO (and I cannot forgive you for making me type that out - horrid word )

What if he had said "Phwooooooooooooar mum has nice legs, doesn't she?"

It's a bit weird.

DH would probably compare my boobies to spaniel ears if i paraded them about.

I think it is an unusual thing to want a small child to say. I can see why a child would be encouraged to comment on a hair cut, as it is something someone has put an effort into changing and is a way of expressing themselves. Breasts and bottoms are just there.

I don't go around telling DD or DS that they have a nice foot/bottom/arm/neck and they don't say that to me. It has never crossed my mind that individual body parts need to be complimented for a child to grow up comfortable with their body. I suppose I thought that by not commenting on people's bodies and being comfortable with my own, I was setting the example that people's bodies are fine as they are, and we don't need to make judgements about them. Now I'm wondering if I've got it wrong.

Do other people compliment their children's body parts and encourage their children to comment on theirs?

But he didn't!

No, we don't single out body parts for complimenting, we do comment on haircuts and new glasses etc though!

I think it's funny.

Not weird at all.

It's just good hearted fun. You should be pleased your DH thinks you have nice boobs!

I don´t think it´s about saying "boobies" or complimenting them.

It´s about wanting the LO to repeat it imo.

I think you need to sit down with your DH and have a chat - he has some serious issues about boundaries and appropriate behaviour.

Talking about boobies not necessarily sexual but I agree with the idea he'd balk if it was reversed, e.g. nice arse/willy!

My eyes are rolling so much I look like one of those old charity shop dolls with their eyes stuck in the back of my head!

Ugh. Inappropriate.

As for getting DD to repeat it

Crossing a boundary imo.

And hairylights is 100% right about the child protection stuff.

DH will give me compliments in front of the DC and say "here's your lovely mummy" or whatever - but my jaw would hit the floor if he said something like this

My dh would be is delighted if when I compliment him on his nice bum

...especially when he wears a kilt

YANBU for thinking it's a bit inappropriate, but it sounds as though he was just making a jokey compliment, using a toddler's ability to parrot what they don't understand, as the joke. Not in the best taste - and not very wise, given toddlers' tendency to repeat things at inopportune moments - but I don't think there was anything sinister or potentially abusive about it. They're breasts fgs - if the OP breastfed then her DD will associate them with that, nothing else. It's not like he said "mummy's got a lovely cunt....go on, say it..." is it now?

YANBU

kids have a habit of noticing boobs but it is innapropriate
My DS 18mnths has discovered fart noises, and likes to mnake them on my boobs I'm scared hell try and do this to another woman at playgroup or elsewhere