MN jury required on whether I am a prude

[SenoritaViva]

This morning DH and DD (3 almost 4) are sitting up in bed. I am getting dressed. Take top off, this is the discussion:

DH 'Mummy has fantastic boobies, DD say Mummy has fantastic boobies, go on say Mummy has fantastic boobies'

I ask him to stop doing that, he thinks I am a prude, I think it is a bit strange!

Don't have problem with DD seeing me naked (nor DH obviously!) and this is not a case of being worried this will turn DD into a lesbian, if she's gay she's gay. Also didn't have problem with DH eyeing me up and making faces behind DD, fine and amusing. But I just didn't want him to include DD in this. Secondly, was concerned she'd go to school chanting 'My mummy has fantastic boobies'. Albeit amusing, somewhat embarrassing for me.

This is not some ball breaker argument, I'd just like to know whether I have lost my sense of humour and being prudish, or whether like me, you think it a bit odd.

yanbu

YANBU.

Very inappropriate I think.

My husband is lovely, he is not some sexual deviant etc. so please don't make him out to be!

I really appreciate your replies, I was willing to accept that he was right but it seems I might be this time.

Cantspel - er no, he's late 30's!

yanbu.

I think general 'mummy is pretty' and when she is older, 'mum is in good shape' (with a view to promoting healthy body image) is fine, singling out parts in a sexual manner, not.

YANBU or a prude. It was too sexual. Imagine your kids coming out with that in public to a teacher/anybody! They wouldn't have to see their "boobies" to come out with it would they!!

I wouldn't have liked that at all.

nectarina me too. Even as a toddler that kind of stuff can affect you quite profoundly.

I was going to post that including children in sexual behaviour, and observation of sexual behaviour ia actually a form of abuse.

But I knew I'd probably be flamed and didn't
want to get into that.

Op if it made you feel icky it probably made your kids feel icky.

bupcakes - I presume a note of sarcasm?!

You're not being prudish.

I guess he thought it would sound cute coming from your daughter as in 'Mummy looks very pretty today' but I think it's too sexual.

As the PP said if you told her to say 'Daddy has a fantastic willy' that would surely make him feel uncomfortable?

YANBU

I don't think its anything untoward, just your DH not thinking about what he's doing. Probably thought it was funny.

hairylights - I can see your point, but this really was a one off from my DH. He is normally courteous, lovely and respectful. That's why I needed a jury, normally I trust his judgement and it was so out of character.

lol i think its funny

Quenelle and PP - that is what I said to him and I think he saw the point.

I agree with others, appreciating the way we look is a lovely thing to do but at no point socially do we say to our friends 'wow, your boobs look amazing today'. Except the exception of course when you're giving your mate some feedback on a dress etc and say 'well it makes your bust/legs/bum look great.' but that's quite a complicated social rule isn't it? Not one for a 3 year old to learn yet.

late 30's and still uses the word boobies?????

Does he still have a winkie as well?

custardo - I am glad someone thinks so, as I think that's what DH thought. Would you like him?!

Deadly serious. Get thee to a refuge.

YANBU

i see nothing wrong with him teaching your DD that the natural female body is beautiful but for him to focus specifically on your boobs, i assume because he sees them as a sexual part of your body, is inappropriate.

cantspel - he used boobies because that's what we use for DD. He would not have used that had she not been there!

"but at no point socially do we say to our friends 'wow, your boobs look amazing today'."

Well if we did, I don´t think we´d be getting anyone to repeat it

One off ... Yes... But still icky for your children. So knock it on the head now before it becomes accepted.

This is about inappropriate behaviour which makes
or could make the kids feel uncomfortable.

I would have two issues with this -
first 'boobies.' .

Second, it's disrespectful to your DD to get her to parrot something for his own amusement, which is basically what he was doing. Because he thought it would be hilarious to hear a three year old say 'nice boobies'.

If she repeats the phrase later, believing herself to be clever and appropriate because after all, daddy encouraged her, and she was met with faces from other adults, then it would be dropping her in it a bit and actually a bit mean to put her in that position.

There. Bet he didn't think of that.

Sorry, I lost the thread after 'fantastic boobies'.

What was the question again?

My dh taught my toddler ds to say "Yum, yum, nice bum" :)

I didn't (and don't) think that was sexualisation: it was about being comfortable in our bodies.

BTW: ds is now 10 and is going through the (totally normal) stage of disliking/being by embarassed by seeing boobs and people kissing on TV (along with a general dislike of all thngs "girlie").

...just for clarity, the "Yum, yum, nice bum" was in reference to my bum

I wouldn't mind if this happened once or twice as a joke. If he did it regularily then it would piss me off.

I'm more about your guy comment, why do you have to explain to us this? It wouldn't cross my mind. Did he accuse you of worrying about dd becoming guy?