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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a bit miffed about my weight being an issue..

115 replies

TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 20:26

..with regards to getting pregnant?

Back story - i lost my baby boy last year, had the post mortem results today and they confirmed that it was IUGR that caused his death.
But the consultant also said that i NEED to lose weight before trying again because my weight could cause me to miscarry again?
Now i didnt think i was that big!

But i wonder, has anyone else come across this or heard that you cant carry a child if you are overweight??

Disclaimer - I'm 5'6, size 12-14 and i weigh about 13 stone.

OP posts:
privategodfrey · 28/02/2011 21:40

i cant believe someone would say that

Oh he fucking hated me for 'taking his best mate away from him'. He also tried to cop off with me behind my partner's back! He was a prize tosser.

He did me a favour though because I started working out again and lost the weight pretty quickly.

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 21:42

privategodfrey, are you me?? Grin i know exactly what you mean about the "best friends" Hmm.
What a nob.

OP posts:
CleverHans · 28/02/2011 21:45

I out on a fair bit of weight when stopping smoking. Went from 14 to 16 stone. Have got back to 14.5 stone now which is still overweight for a 6'2 bloke (age 44).

With regards to health and pregnancy, what was interesting was that my resting heart rate went from 80s to mid 60s but my sperm count went from "is there anybody there" to normal. Personally I think the weight loss had some impact on our ability to conceive. Guess I agreee with Tatty above ... its an opportunity to reduce a risk factor. Good luck TSoGB

worraliberty · 28/02/2011 21:49

I have to agree with Redheels I'm 5ft 3" and weigh 8st 3lbs, I'm a size 10. When I was a size 12, I weighed almost 9st. So I agree 12/14 would be nearer 10 and a half stone.

Though I suppose clothes sizes are a total mine field and it depends on where you shop.

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 21:50

Thanks CleverHans, that is interesting.. must be the same in some way for women then. Well i guess the consultant wouldnt have said it if it wasnt true? :)
Also, well done for stopping smoking! I stopped, then after everything that happened i started again, i am down to 2 a day.. but its hard!
Going to get an inhaler tomorrow, i want to be free of nicotine by the time i start TTC!

OP posts:
Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 21:52

Worraliberty, i do shop in a wide variety of places for my clothes so i couldnt put it down to any one shop. But still, i have never struggled to get into a 14. Again, i dont know what to tell you?

OP posts:
LadyBiscuit · 28/02/2011 21:54

I am about 2 stone heavier than my sister and I'm 5'4", she's 5'7". We both wear a size 12 and a lot of my skirts are too tight round the waist on her.

I have a much bigger frame than her basically

BulletWithAName · 28/02/2011 21:56

Wow, I'm 3 and a half stones lighter than you, the same height and I'm a 10/12...Hmm

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 21:56

LadyBiscuit, would that mean i have a smaller frame with more fat?

OP posts:
privategodfrey · 28/02/2011 21:57

I think the discrepancy in sizes is

a) down to different sizing in different shops
b) different weight distribution

For example, when I put on weight it mainly goes on my thighs, arse and stomach. This means I struggle to fit into size 14 trousers but my top half pretty much remains the same.

When my friend (same height) puts on weight it is distributed evenly all over her body. She doesn't need to go up a clothes size like me if the weight gain is less than a stone.

LadyBiscuit · 28/02/2011 22:00

Sorry, I mean I have a smaller frame than my sister and yes, you probably have more fat! TBH I think BMI is a load of cack but if you go to the gym, you can get your body fat measured which is a much better indicator of how chubby you are.

And I'm sorry for your loss too. I know that many consultants are much hotter on weight than they were a few years back and it's really not going to hurt you to lose some weight if you want to conceive agagin.

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 22:03

Privategodfrey thanks for that, it must just be that the fat has gone everywhere then! :)

LadyBiscuit, i am definately going to get rid of it now, as i said before, not just for my sake anymore. After last time i am prepared to do whatever it takes to keep my baby safe.

I wonder what clothing size i would be at my goal weight of 10 stone then?

OP posts:
hairylights · 28/02/2011 22:03

sorry for your loss.

You are overweight so yabu. When ttc it's one of the things not advised. Lose the weight to maximise your chances.

ifancyashandy · 28/02/2011 22:06

Well, 5'8" and 10 stone is (for me) a size 10 / 12 (28 inch waist).

But I think we've established clothing sizes vary massively Grin!

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 22:07

HairyLights, i now agree, I am being unreasonable!
So thankyou everyone who has shut me up :)
I will definately be shedding the pounds!

OP posts:
worraliberty · 28/02/2011 22:07

I'd say at 10st maybe a size 12? It's hard to say because as has been said it's all about distribution. Maybe a size 10 top and a 12 bottom or vice versa?

Trinaluce · 28/02/2011 22:07

Agrred, it's down to the distribution. I could lose ALL the weight I want and I bet my thighs would still be the size of a hippo. Not a hippo's thighs, the actual whole hippo.

My boobs on the other hand would be shrivelled to grapes, as that's always where I lose my weight first Sad

said · 28/02/2011 22:09

Maybe you're not actually 5'6"?

hairylights · 28/02/2011 22:11

I'm 5'4" and 10 St 5 and am definately fat . Size 14 bottoms size 12 tops.

I've had three miscarriages and am now losing weight ready to
ttc again (just in case anyone thought I was being a cow and didn't understand what it's like)

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 22:11

Thinking about it, last time i was about 9/10 stone, i was a size 8 to 10. I remember buying a size 12 jeans as i used to be the "Baggy jeans hanging down your arse" type, and they were huge on me!
Its really strange how it varies so much.

Trinaluce, i feel your pain! :( my boobs are now shrivilled grapes.. not fair! I've only been pregnant once! But i think that was because they went from a B cup do an E cup in the space of a month!

OP posts:
Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 22:13

Said, they measures me today too. Definately 5'6", 171cm :)

Thanks HairyLights, i didnt realise. I'm really sorry for your losses. I wish you all the luck in the world TTC again x

OP posts:
said · 28/02/2011 22:17

It is all very weird. I'm 5'6" and about 9.5 stone (not sure) and I wear a size 12 usually (except gap jeans where I'm a 10)

Original poster
TenSpeedOfGodsBlood · 28/02/2011 22:19

I'm tempted to post pictures of the labels in my clothes Grin

OP posts:
lalamom · 28/02/2011 22:21

I'm so sorry about your loss. I think that you can be overweight and still look good up to a point- eg oprah winfrey looks really gorgeous but she is about 50 LBs overweight. I think I look pretty normal but accept I am indeed not far off 1 stone overweight.....

This is inspiring me to move my arse and get a good 10 pounds off as it seems my bmi is in the overweight bit- I'm 5 5 and 158 pounds- was 147 before i got pregnant and am better nearer 140.

I must have been in denial because i kind of look okay but clearly i am indeed 10 pounds overweight.
I just did not think shifting the weight post baby would be so slow- 1 year on and a good stone to go.

Maybe i should do weight watchers.Still breast feeding and at home and just find i crave food in a way i never have before when i would forget to eat during the day. Gone are those days!

hairylights · 28/02/2011 22:22

Thanks tens you too.

I'm trying hard. Want to lose two stone. Isn't easy!