To ask if you ever smack?

[thatwasntverycleverwasit]

I am suffering from enormous guilt having delivered one swift smack to the back of DDs legs when I was at the end of my rope (first, and I hope only, time). Yes it was unreasonable and I said sorry to her. But it seems to be a completely taboo subject - surely I can't be the only Mum to have done this?

A sane voice perfumed, thank the Lord.

The other day I said to DD1 who is 14 "when you were 3 and I was in bed with you trying to get you to go to sleep and I was too ill to move and you kept kicking my stomach when I was heavily pregnant, was I right to smack you?"

She was shocked that she'd behaved like that and then she said of course I was right to have smacked her as DD2 could have been hurt.

Sensible girl my DD1!

I thought Gibbons post was also rude. And I don't have a problem with non smacking parents.
I just think that Mumsy AND Gibbon shouldn't have posted their posts.

Yes a few times and to be honest it DOES work

AllDirections - How exactly would a baby in the uterus that could survive falls, car accidents etc have been hurt by a 3 year olds kicks ?
Complete rubbish, you were pissed off and tired.

Are you serious mamatomany??! If so you are an unfortunate combination of smug and stupid.

Of course babies in the womb can survive falls and car accidents, but equally one blow can bring on premature labour.
I'm not saying smacking was the only option there, but your sweeping dismissal is ridiculous.

Highly unlikely though.

mamatomany, 'could' is the important word that you used in your post! So does that mean that that a baby in the uterus 'might not' survive the things you have mentioned?

not very clever

I can tell ytou that there is a lot less smacking in public now. ..shopping etc....private? probably less than there used to be. (I notice a lot of eyeballing in public.

Have they been watching Frostie who made a fortune out of her TV series. (some of it controversial) "Gabby"

PS a lot of people misundersatand the law on this.
In broad terms it is "no implements." and "no permanent marks." left

not true about no permanent marks

no marks at all

if you smack your child in public you are likely to be reported and you could be arrested for assault

and it would serve you right

hence the father who was arrested for smacking his dd at the dentist - nothing to do with implements or permanent marks, he assaulted her and he was arrested

www.childrenslegalcentre.com/OneStopCMS/Core/CrawlerResourceServer.aspx?resource=40A9C9D9-9FA3-465D-A91B-1265C036A2AA&mode=link&guid=2e53fecc8c434067ae167ca08f224db9

This link should take you to The children's Legal Centre article about the law relating to smacking.

I have on the odd occasion, im not proud of it ,but i also dont think looking at the bigger picture of my parenting that it makes me a terrible mother .

I did very occassionally when my DS's were younger. It was always a sign that I had lost my temper, or been terrified in to a instinctive reaction, taught them bugger all and made me feel like shit. I always apologised. Now I find that removal of the XBox/tv time/lego works the best. Although at 10 and 7 they rarely need such discipline.

stiflersmum

I am pleased to see someone feels as strongly as you about smacking.

its only partly what the law is; its what is actioned...

The cases in the national press are there because they are very rare. (Road deaths dont even make the national press with 3 thou killed a year)

still a lot of private smacking but less than there was 10 years ago.

*** A lady still speaks for the smackers. saw her on ch4 the other night. Forget her name.

Cheers "Gabby"

When they were younger, I slapped a few times. I always felt bad about it, and it never worked. So I made decision not to slap again, and haven't.
I found for under 5s the naughty chair worked well. And for 5+ 'consequences' work best for me.

But don't beat yourself up about it. I bet all moms have done at least one thing they are not proud of.

I never smack, and anyone who smacks DD, no matter WHO THEY ARE would be reported to the police/SS. Even my mother. Seriously.

I don't personally do it because I think it sends the wrong message -- "I'm bigger than you, so it's ok for me to hurt you if you don't do what I want". I don't think it's a good solution for any reason.

The way I see it, if I inflict physical pain on someone it means I have completely lost control.

I don't judge other people for doing it as a one-off (although the 'only if he's doing something dangerous' excuse doesn't wash with me). I do judge people for whom that is their usual method of discipline.

Miss Verinder...what about consenting adults? "Gabby"

No, never hit my child, don't intend too. I get frustrated, I yell when she does something that could be dangerous but I've just never had the urge to hit or smack her. There again, I've never had the urge to hit an adult either. I'm not convinced either are acceptable (to me).

"I chastised my child"

you hit her, you mean

all this euphemising shows that you know how crap it is.