My MIL is always pleasant enough to me but she is the most emotionally repressed person I have ever met. A list of just a few of the crap things she has done/does to me (sorry, this will be long!):
The ILs have never been to our home. Me & DP have been together for years but they have an excuse not to visit every time. However, she tells all her relatives that we never invite them and don't want them to visit. FIL works 3 days a wk with DP, just round the corner and MIL is a housewife who visits her sister every few months who lives nearby.
I am pregnant with their first grandchild. They have never once said congratulations or asked me how I am - despite knowing that I have been v ill throughout the whole pg and am under consultant care. 2 of DP's cousins' partners are also pg and we know that she sends them weekly emails asking how they are (she's only met one of them once and not even met the other).
I am 9 yrs older than DP and she is very ashamed about this - takes me aside at parties, etc. to hiss at me that if people ask how old I am, I must refuse to tell them or lie. Of course, I pay no attention. She also thinks that because I am older, I manipulate him and boss him about and try to shape him into what I want. This is absolute bollocks.
I have food allergies and she won't cook for me. Fair enough. However, she cooks for BIL's fussy veggie girlfriend AND she won't let me use her kitchen. Considering that we stay with them for a week at a time, due to the distance, this is fairly problematic (they also live in the middle of nowhere so I can't pop out to the shops or a cafe). When DP or anyone else tackles her, she insists I'm mistaken/lying and walks away.
Met BIL's gf for the first time this Xmas. She seemed confused when she met me and eventually blurted out that MIL had told her I worked in a supermarket and was going back to school to get my GCSEs. I have actually been trying to get funding for my PhD and I dunno where she got the supermarket thing from (makes me v angry that MIL thinks that is crappy, btw). ILs act and talk like me and my family are v common and 'rough', despite my family all being better-educated than hers and being much more cultured. Perhaps if the ILs would actually meet my family they might realise this?
Told us that we 'had to have' a boy as they don't want a granddaughter. We are actually having a boy and it sorta pisses me off that they've got their wish! Also told us they won't be seeing the baby much and don't want to do any 'grandparent duties', but dote on the children of their neighbours and other relatives.
DP is v shy and she never makes an effort to talk to him and tells everyone he is ' still attention-seeking' (which was her excuse for not doing anything about it when he was a child). He hasn't got a birthday gift for the last 2 years but his parents are v generous to his other 2 brothers (and yes, he IS the middle one - did you guess?!).
Oh, and she never washes her hands before or after cooking (and I mean she does the gardening then makes bread with hands crusted in soil - her food often has grey and black clumps of crud in it) and doesn't wash them after handling raw meat. Believes that using soap is what makes people ill and laughs at me for washing my hands. She also sprays chemicals and aerosols everywhere yet never dusts or hoovers (I am allergic to dust, various chemicals and aerosols, so is a barrel of laughs for me!).
Am quite pleased they live so far away and want so little to do with us, but feel sorry for DP who loves her unconditionally. My parents are v caring, generous and involved individuals and he often gets sad that he'll never get that from his own parents.