To not even consider breastfeeding

[Ilovemybreasts]

Currently pregnant with no 2, breastfed no 1 to around six months and HATED the experience so not keen to repeat it for several reasons.

1)Felt like a big, leaky, highly uncomfortable cow for the whole time and could not wait to have my body back.

2. Have seen the physical effects of breast feeding two children on several of my friends and it ain't pretty. My breasts are large and have only just recovered from the first feeding frenzy. Two shirt-spaced cycles of constant swelling and shrinking would not be good for their wellbeing! Although my body has borne children I still like to look and feel attractive; being a mother is not my whole identity and not an excuse to let my health and image fall by the wayside.

3. Hours spent pumping and clusterfeeding and mucking about led to a very tired and stressed out me and this time I will have a toddler also needing my time and attention.

4. The many benefits of breastfeeding are not entirely obvious to me. Dc1 still gets ill and picks up bugs as much as several other children we know who were exclusively ff.

5. I became a complete bf bore, bleating on to everyone about it and it's benefits. I swear it took over my life when I should have just been enjoying my baby.

Flame away. Convince me otherwise. Am I likely to be judged for this in real life?

rainbow - would you seriously not make sacrifices for your children? I find that a bit strange tbh - I always think of my children and how my decisions would effect them. I would feel guilty about making a selfish decision that doesn't benefit them.

My kids would be better off if I didnt work full time, didnt have a tv, sent them to private school, never fed them junk food etc. All these would be better for them but would require sacrifices from me I'm not prepared to make. THat makes me normal.

I'm not saying that we don't sometimes have to do those things but I would say they are more out of necessity than actually purposely setting out to be selfish. There are some parenting choices that I do consider to be purely selfish and not really justifiably so but that's just my opinion :)

YABU

Fine, make that choice but I dont want to have to pay for your breast cancer treatment/children's admittance to hospital for gastroentereitis etc.

Thankgoodness the NHS is more compassionate

Stranded is not stealth - stealth did a thread about it I think.

I breastfed both my children and I thought it was fab. I have always had small breasts so I did not notice a difference. Now that i am older I am not sure I would BF another child as I am quite vain. They are your breasts so do what you want with them.

'Fine, make that choice but I dont want to have to pay for your breast cancer treatment/children's admittance to hospital for gastroentereitis etc.'

What about women who don't have children at all and get breast cancer. Let's penalise them, too!

Let's penalise children whilst we're at it.

Hell, why not the lot - overweight/obese, drunk, heritable disease? Stuff you if you've led a less than perfect life with less than perfect genes, stump up or die!

THanks Tracey - I was confused!

Leonie, you make the right decisions for you and your family, but they aren't the right decisions for everyone. Smug isn't a good look on anyone.

YANBU, it's your choice...but:

The change in shape is down to pregnancy not b/f (and also luck plays a part - your friends were unlucky)

Also, I found b/f great if you're lazy (like me!). If you master feeding lying down, you'll never ever have to get up in the night with your baby! Forget all the other benefits - this is the BEST benefit!

But if you want unbroken sleep and have to traipse downstairs to heat bottles, then sit up and feed you baby....up to you.

Darlene, I chose not to breast feed. I've also had breast cancer.

If you knew about the latter you'd know just how fucking selective the information on breast feeding as a way of reducing the likelihood of breast cancer is.

I find your comments horrendously offensive and exceedingly ignorant.

In fact, I've never been tempted to call a poster a fucking cunt before, but I do tonight.

FFS why do people keep falling for this shit stirring nonsense. If the OP is genuinely a pregnant mother to be and not a shit stirring muppet I'll eat my own large arse.

YABU and sound very selfish I'm afraid. Also not completely sure I believe that you BF for 6 months before - someone as selfish sounding as you wouldn't have endured it that long if you hated it,surely?

Also, I BF all of mine, still going with no.3, and my boobs are FAB.

BabyDubsEverywhere - I find the idea of you being creeped by breastfeeding more than a little creepy! You're repulsed and embarrassed by breastfeeding? I'd say you have some issues with body confidence! You also sound rather ignorant and immature.

YANBU, I felt the same when I was pg with DS eleven years ago. Although in my defence, I was only 17 (18 when I gave birth).
The whole thought of someone sucking at my tit 24/7, the hours of endless howling (and I don't care what anyone says, ff babies DO sleep longer than bf babies), the saggy leaky tits, having to do every feed myself, not being able to go out without my baby, just the whole thought of it disgusted me.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with formula, it's a perfectly healthy way to feed your baby. It's not that much of a faff either, I used to just make up eight bottles in one go, stick them at the back of the fridge, then heat it up while I changed DS, pop it in his mouth, half an hour later all finished! Whereas people I know who have bf had to sit for hours upon hours, just for one feed!

Sorry to hear that Vallhala. I hope you are OK now. I can see how hurtful that must have sounded from darlene, of course there are many factors involved in breast cancer and it is very silly to suggest that not breastfeeding causes breast cancer, of course it doesn't!

If people are sitting for hours and hours at one feed then something is going wrong there.

IveStillGotIt - I wouldn't say there's nothing wrong with formula, or that it's perfectly healthy, as it does carry some risks. However it is an adequate form of infant nutrition and certainly the best substitute for breastmilk available.

Ah, thank you *myboobsrock (Blimey, I wish mine did! :) )

It's not hurtful so much as infuriating as reading the research and summary recently I discovered that the wording of the study is somewhat creative and that the risks are exaggerated. I'm just buggered if I can recall where I found all the info now or I'd be posting it on here.

I'm also fucking furious that the callous individual would have been happy to see my children effectively orphaned than me be treated for my cancer.