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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

about Valentine's cards for children?

178 replies

LifeIsButtercream · 13/02/2011 09:41

Ex-H has sent DD (21months) a Valentine's card.....

..... a special 'To My Daughter' Valentine's card.....

.....last time I checked Valentine's Day was for couples? I've found cards all over the place 'Happy Valentine's Day to my dog/cat/parents/left toe/nearby lamp post'

AIBU in thinking this is a little bit of commercial over-kill?

And for the record - I'm not just sulking because my toddler has more Valentines this year than I do (i.e. she has one) Sad

OP posts:
LessNarkyPuffin · 13/02/2011 20:47

Ew. Valentine's Day is about romantic love.

employmentlawquery · 13/02/2011 21:01

I am not going to send DH a valentine's card. However, we went out for a lovely but modest lunch today (and took DS aged 2 3/4). I have an M and S meal deal planned for tomorrow (which DS will share apart from the wine of course) and also an edible surprise gift for DS of a favourite goodie of his (which DS will no doubt also share). It is very much a family thing for us at the mo!

piprabbit · 13/02/2011 21:05

Valentine's Day is a big anniversary for DH and me. We sometimes go quite overboard.
I like to include the children by giving them a small card and a heart-shaped sweetie.

poochela · 13/02/2011 21:16

creepy, dont like it.

earwicga · 13/02/2011 21:27

Bugger! I always make cards for my children. If I'd known I could of bought them then it would of saved me trying to be artistic Grin

EightiesChick · 13/02/2011 22:11

What I dislike about it is that there are loads of daddy-daughter cards, all with 'from/to my little princess / from your little angel' messages, and quite a few mummy from your little boy ones, plus the generic 'to my mummy/ to my daddy' ones. But you don't find any dad/son cards, and there aren't many mum/daughter ones either. If we're accepting that V-day can be about love that isn't only romantic/sexual (which I think I am fine with now) then how about recognising and encouraging that between dads and sons, and also more between mums and daughters, instead of effectively making it into a parody of a 'romantic' card?

sleepywombat · 13/02/2011 23:04

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sweetgilly · 13/02/2011 23:06

LifeIsButtercream

I think that is most odd and very worrying.

swallowedAfly · 13/02/2011 23:11

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swallowedAfly · 13/02/2011 23:11

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nappyaddict · 14/02/2011 00:36

Surely valentine's day is not for couples but for single people?

Traditionally valentine's day cards were meant to be sent by single people not couples. You would send a card to someone you fancied and wanted to get with and sign it with love from ? or guess who.

1Catherine1 · 14/02/2011 00:50

I think it is slightly odd too tbh. Although I spent 20 minutes trying to write the card I bought for OH this evening and concluded it is a complete waste of time. My OH shows me how much he loves me every day and I do the same back.

I think I agree with nappyaddict, Valentine's Day cards are more for single people or new couples. Those that have an established relationship and a healthy relationship shouldn't really only have one day where they show they love each other. As far as sending one to your child though, I just can't get my head around it. I think the main reason for this though is because I really see Valentine's Day as the most pointless "holiday" of the year. It really is only about making money for the card companies between the low point of Christmas and Mother's Day, that's why its about half way between the two... either that or I'm getting cynical in my old age Hmm

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 14/02/2011 01:01

I think it's a bit 'icky' somehow. Valentines really are tied up with romance and I don't see a need for children to be involved with cards to or from their parents.

I think a heart-shaped lolly or pencil or similar as described in this thread is really nice though.... just not cards.

redpanda13 · 14/02/2011 01:01

My DD was born on Valentines Day. Last year was the 1st I gave her anything. Just some sweets. Told her that it was because when she was born I got my Valentine's love for ever and ever. She was more pleased about the Valentine than the birthday. Going to do it again this year. Only got so long before she tells me to eff off Grin
My mum sent me a couple of cards in my most dark teenage years. Think 7 stone thinks she is fat, acne and The Smiths 'How Soon is Now' played over and over teen. They actually gave me a wee boost. She did'nt do it all the time. She did'nt admit till I was much older. I love my mum for that Blush. Jeez I might buy her something now!

GloriaSmut · 14/02/2011 01:26

Valentine's Day is bollocks. Sending Valentine cards to children is creepy bollocks.

thumbdabwitch · 14/02/2011 06:14

Dad never sent me a Valentine's card until I split up with my fiancé - then he sent me one every year until I had someone else to do it for me. It was a nice gesture. I send him one now that Mum has died.

I don't send one to DS - it doesn't feel quite right.

Bucharest · 14/02/2011 06:25

Totally creepy and weird.
And I'd go as far as to say something to add to the MN campaign against the sexualisation of our children.
I actually find it really disturbing.

MrsDrOwenHunt · 14/02/2011 08:14

its commercial wank

Bucharest · 14/02/2011 08:16

Agreed.
Creepy commercial wank.

BeribbonedGibbon · 14/02/2011 08:49

'Totally creepy and weird.
And I'd go as far as to say something to add to the MN campaign against the sexualisation of our children.
I actually find it really disturbing.'

If you see som ething sexual in it I think that says more about you. Giving your child a cuddly toy or some sweets and saying I love you is not sexualisation fgs.

It's not my bag (and I do think it's commercialised) but I'm not going to be sharpening the pitchforks and getting all outraged.

Live and let live. We need more of that on MN at the moment.

swallowedAfly · 14/02/2011 08:55

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BeribbonedGibbon · 14/02/2011 09:02

I don't like the Daddy's little Princess thing either. Or the whole Princess thing in general tbh. For me it's more about gender stereotyping.

I can see some of the (vomit inducing) 'Princess' Merchandise is on dodgy ground with regards to sexualisation but it's a huge leap to say a father gving his daughter or mother her son, something for valentines day, has sexual undertones.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 14/02/2011 09:13

Absolutely agree, that 'Daddy's Little Princess' thing is really vomit-inducing. It feels just... wrong and squirmy. Confused

I don't think there is an equivalent for sons? Apart from 'Mummy's Little Soldier', perhaps...?

I don't see it as 'sexualising' children but to me it seems a bit silly.

Valentines were never about kids but like everything else, it's now all-inclusive, has become the 'norm' and the 'tat sellers' are laughing all the way to the bank... Hmm

FooffyShmoofer · 14/02/2011 09:14

You perceive it how you want to.
In our house it's just love that's all (yeah vom, whatever)

If you want to see it as romance, sex etc then that's also your prerogative. Each to their own. Meanings move on, things change.

swallowedAfly · 14/02/2011 09:21

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