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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

about Valentine's cards for children?

178 replies

LifeIsButtercream · 13/02/2011 09:41

Ex-H has sent DD (21months) a Valentine's card.....

..... a special 'To My Daughter' Valentine's card.....

.....last time I checked Valentine's Day was for couples? I've found cards all over the place 'Happy Valentine's Day to my dog/cat/parents/left toe/nearby lamp post'

AIBU in thinking this is a little bit of commercial over-kill?

And for the record - I'm not just sulking because my toddler has more Valentines this year than I do (i.e. she has one) Sad

OP posts:
CheerfulYank · 13/02/2011 14:48

Here everyone sends them to everyone...and all the kids bring them for the whole class. But then again winter is very long and dreary and we like to break it up with celebrations. (We go crazy for St. Paddy's day too :))

blimp72 · 13/02/2011 14:57

i get a funny one for my DD's t send to their dad but it's only for fun we don't really do all that mushy love n romance thing in our house, however my DD1 age 7 has made one for her best friend but it just says your ACE and it's a pic of the ace of hearts.

ChunkyBrewster · 13/02/2011 15:03

My Dad gave me a dozen long stem roses on Valentines Day when I was 7 because he said he wanted the first man to ever give me red roses to always love me.

mummytime · 13/02/2011 15:17

I find the US where kids have to send a Valentines card to everyone in their class very a little odd.

But I guess it is a culture thing.

CheerfulYank · 13/02/2011 15:20

You don't have to, it's just that you either bring them for everyone or no one at all. In the past you could just bring them to your friends, and it resulted in a heap of Valentines on the desks of the popular children and nothing on others. :(

Waspie · 13/02/2011 15:34

I think it's creepy. My mum has sent one to my son (he is 3). I have thrown it away unopened just as I did last year.

I see no point in wasting money on a pointless Hallmark day. Same goes for cards for Mother's Day, Father's Day, Grandparent's Day, Secretary's Day, Second Cousin's Day, Wedding Anniversary, My Dog survived an operation, Congratulations on cutting your toenails, It's Wednesday, let's Party! etc etc...

CheerfulYank · 13/02/2011 15:40

Well, if your mum bought it and sent it, the money's more wasted if you throw it away instead of letting him have it, isnt it? Confused

My mother always sends DS a card and some candy and usually a Valentine's themed book, too.

elmofan · 13/02/2011 15:59

We have bought heart shapes boxes of chocs for the dc's , i think its a nice little way of saying we love them .

Waspie · 13/02/2011 16:04

To my mind the money was wasted when she handed it to the cashier in exchange for a pointless piece of cardboard.

Esp. as you knew that this is what I would do!

Waspie · 13/02/2011 16:06

Oops, for "you" read "she".

Sanesometimes1 · 13/02/2011 16:11

I usually make everyting in my dd lunchbox heart shaped on val day - don't send a card though - so does that count ?

SteelMagnolia · 13/02/2011 16:45

Growing up in the States, Valentines was definitely a holiday for children, not just a couples thing. My mom probably went a bit over the top :) but we used to have family Valentines' breakfast, where the table would be decorated with Valentines confetti, and we would sit down as a family and eat (an attempt at) heart-shaped pancakes. My sister and I each had a Valentine from our parents on the table as well. If you think of Valentines as a romantic holiday that might sound quite strange, but it was so nice. I'd love to do it for my family one day but not sure my UK-raised son would be into it so much. Grin

NorthernGobshite · 13/02/2011 16:53

We don't buy each other cards etc as its all a load of Hallmark shite! But do buy dd a valentines cuddly toy every year just because she likes them. My mum sends dd a card every year and this year dd has sent her one. All a bit odd, but hey ho.

kaumana · 13/02/2011 16:58

Spent a few years in the States as a kid and it was the norm to hand cards out to all in the class. Though I did think it odd being used to UK traditions. However, I did enjoy receiving them!

MIL has sent a card every year to DS anonomously but now he's 12, he believes it is granny but part of him hopes it is someone else, not sure if this is a good thing.

Friend bought a card for her DD11 to send to a near neighbour's DS13,wrote it out on behalf of DD (to hide writing) and got DS6 to deliver it. Seems a bit much at that age.

Gillzz · 13/02/2011 17:06

My ds who is 4 came home from nursery on thursday with a card for me and his gran and told me valentines is for giving someone you love a card!! and asked could he make his great gran one as she's not been well because it would make her very happy!!

please tell me wot is wrong with that?

me and dh bought ds a card and little teddy with heart and heart shaped lolly all for £3 and the smile on his face and how happy he was is well worth £3.

lospollos · 13/02/2011 17:21

is this just me I just fin d it a bit ...wierd Confused

I agree with OP valentines day is for couples

LionessLady · 13/02/2011 17:37

My Grandpa still sends me one Grin

MooMooFarm · 13/02/2011 17:49

I've never done cards for the DC but as children we always used to get a 'visit' from Mr Valentine. Sometime in the afternoon after school there'd be a knock at the door. We'd run to see who was there, but we'd always miss him and just find a bag of goodies (sweets, a magazine and a little toy or something) for each of us in the porch.

Lots of my friends at the time used to say Mr Valentine didn't visit them, so maybe it was just something my family did...

pantaloons · 13/02/2011 17:54

My 3 DC's have made cards for me and DH and we have all made DH some heart shaped biscuits. DD who is 7 told DH he must get me a box chocolates, otherwise we wouldn't have bothered with each other. So, here it is all about the family and how much we love and care for each other.

WannabeNigella · 13/02/2011 17:56

I send my ds a card and Hubby gets me flowers from ds too.

I think it's really sweet and I love buying him a heart shaped choc lolly too.

It is a tradition I intend to stick to for a while yet. He's 3. I've also bought DH one from DD that says "from your little girl".

I agree that it is a huge marketing thing but at the end of the day almost everything is nowadays and yes I succumb, so what?

Addtitionally, there are many ways to love, valentines isn't just about a sexual attraction sort of love, in my opinion.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 13/02/2011 17:58

all valentine cards are nobbish. Buying them for a long term partner makes you gullible and buying them for your children makes you slightly odd.

WannabeNigella · 13/02/2011 18:03

I don't consider myself to be "slightly odd" at all.

You dot have to "buy" them. You could make one? Or make biscuits etc like an earlier poster suggested.

How narrow minded to accuse someone of being odd simply because you choose not to treat them to a card or similar. What child doesn't enjoy opening and looking at a card? The best bit is seeing ds's face when he realises he has some mail to open.

Jammyrella · 13/02/2011 18:15

Cadders - we used to have Father Valentine (aka Jack Valentine) bring us presents when I was little too. It's a Norfolk tradition.

Not in Norfolk now, but I just carried it on and stood out in the rain, dropping presents on the doorstep then running away to hide behind the car before DD and DH opened the door. (Yes, it's a day early but by the time we get in from work/preschool tomorrow it'll be too late and she'll be too tired)

Jammyrella · 13/02/2011 18:17

Just noticed, sorry, MooMoo had it too :o

Shodan · 13/02/2011 18:17

My dad used to send me and my sister one if we were single on Valentine's Day. We loved it. From a man who found it difficult to express emotion it was very special.

He would say that we were always to remember that if no other man was wise enough to love us, there was always at least one man who would love us forever.

So yah boo to the detractors. For some people these cards mean more than just the words inside.

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