Competitive parent comments (just for fun)

[prettymuchapixiegirl]

A few that I've come across:

"I love the way your DS is happy sitting in the buggy. My DS is never happy just sitting there like that, he is so grown up and needs constant stimulation or he gets bored"

"Oh DS, look at that slop that Pixiegirl's DS is eating, you're wondering what it is because you only have big boy food don't you?"

"To be honest I'd much rather have a child who's more average, like your DS. I think being so advanced is going to bring my DS nothing but problems when he gets to school"

All said by a "friend" who is lovely in many ways but also very competitive and our meet ups are frequently spent with her reeling off a list of what her DS is now doing, or by her making out that there's a problem because she thinks he's doing things so early....

What competitive parenting comments have you all come across?

DSIS again
"my children don't need shoes"
"you are so lucky your children don't care about fashion - mine would never wear an anorak like that unfortunately"

She sounds like a good time, swan. She and my SIL (see my post above) should get together. :)

Thegreatpudenda - 'A friend of mine told me (with a straight face) that her child was potty trained day and night before the age of 1'

Mine was, so perhaps she was telling you the truth!

"dentally retarded"

That is fricking genius!

Will steal that [hrase if you dont mind.....ds1 didnt get any teeth til he was 11 months and then it took AGES for them to all come through....he is 7.5 and has only just lost his first tooth.

nufsed - I didn't think that was possible! How? How can they pull their pants up and down? And said child was wearing nappies every time I saw her after. I think my friend was, at best, being a little premature with her announcement!

Loving the competitive teeth thing - I never even knew this was as big as it is until one day when visiting paediatrician (v nice man) with minor complaint for DS1 when DS2 was a few weeks old, the v nice man asked if everything was well with the baby. Told him all fine but that surprisingly he had two teeth (wasn't born with them but had them literally a few weeks later). The v nice man laughed and said "well that'll give you a head start at the school gate"!

I have always made sure i am never a competetive mum, even though i could be. My ds turned 2 in January, much to most peoples suprise when they ask how old he is. Not just because he is tall for his age but because can talk really well, full sentences, counts to 20 etc and has done since about 18 months old.

When people say how well he talks i always feel slightly embarressed and end up saying how my dd couldn't say anything when she was 2

I could easily go around boosting how great my ds is and how bright he is but i can't be arsed and i know him talking at an early age doesn't make me a better mum then anyone else.

nufsed - What?! Your child could tell you that they needed the toilet, walk into the bathroom, pull down their own clothes, get onto the toilet, do their business, wipe (not getting poo all over themselves), get down, pull clothes up again, wash and dry hands . . . all before the age of 1? . . . Don't be so fucking ridiculous! If they couldn't do all of that then they were not potty trained as every one of those things is required.

solooovely you sound like Gina Ford!

I do tend to agree though. Could you come round and say that to my step mil please.

MrsSparkle - Oh no not Gina Ford! Don't say that! Just meant (as I'm sure you realise and are just winding me up) that you can't claim your child is potty trained when they aren't capable of walking to the toilet or speaking to say they need the toilet. Have had this argument with my aunt who insists she was trained before 1. It seems to be an older generation thing. When I asked the aunt how she could be dry before she could do these things she didn't know what to say.

p.s. will happily come round and have that conversation with step MIL.

I haven't read the whole thread but when DS was about 6 weeks old, DH was carrying him in a sling on the tube and got into conversation with another dad. In the course of their 60 second chat he learned that the other Dad's DD (14 months) favourite type of sushi, that she could use chopsticks and how many different words she could understand and say clearly.

And it doesn't stop with age. I once went on a cruise with my mum (don't judge) and sat next to this tanned retiree 'considerably richer than yow' type. By the end of the lunch I knew what the Bishop of Durham had said to him at his daughter's wedding, the number of times his son in law (an american banker) went jogging by the thames per week and what decorative works they were doing to their Fulham townhouse.

I only had a salad.

solooovely you speak the truth. I'm always hearing about elimination communication but what's the point of having a TT baby that can't take his pants off and flush the chain himself?

Sat next to a dad in ds's class who nudged me and said

"The sooner the teacher accepts that ds is the genious that he is, the better for all concerned"

solooevely by your standards my DS 6.5 isn't fully potty trained on certain days of the week.

Does anyone else get annoyed with competitive children. You know the ones who know they are better at something than another child and constantly ask 'which [insert activity/level] group are you in for xy and z' or 'Can you do this - when they know full well the child can't'

Anyone think the offspring of friends/family mentioned on this thread are heading this way

dontdisstheteens I have just read your story and now I am having a little tearful moment!

I was friends with a competitive mum. She was always bragging about her dd's amazing abilities. Her dd is now 7 and one of the ring leaders of a 'girl gang'(self titled) who are terrorising the children at infant school. She doesn't boast about her now. Cue smug laughing....

buttonmooncup & solooovely - it must be a generation thing. Thirty years ago when my dd was 'potty trained' the term meant out of nappies - which she was. At that time disposables were newfangled and not entirely to be trusted and it was a huge deal not to have to deal with big, thick, square terry nappies.

I am so sorry to have used incorrect terminology and to have appeared to be 'fucking ridiculous'.

nufsed - I think your right. I am 30yo and was in terries. From about 10 months when mum stopped BF me I was sat on potty for evening milk - I usually did a wee and was heavily praised. It just taught me the feeling although I wasn't potty trained until 18 months.

Sorry shopuls have said morning and evening

Loving this thread!

I have a friend who's competative in a slightly different way! There's 4 weeks between our ds's (hers is older) She's competative in things such as illness. my Ds has Eczema. Hers is worse. my Ds woke 3 times in the night coughing, hers woke 4. Mine was awake at 6am, hers was 5.50am.

Its not just the children. She has to have it worse with everything. A friend who was 8 months pregnant commented on how fed up she was. "I remember that feeling too well. At least its not the middle of summer like it was when I was your stage!"

It just makes me laugh!

I was reading in a magazine women are now indulging in competitive stress "I've got so much to do." "No, I've got so much to do!"

Both my grannies are still alive and one of them likes to indulge in competitive old-ladying Whenever one asks about the other, she always follows my reply by telling me how much worse her various ailments are and how much better other granny has it, and anyway, other granny is four years younger and that makes all the difference. They are a few months shy of 91 and 87 ffs, surely four years is a blink to them?

She was furious recently when other granny's attack of some skin thing they both suffer from was demonstrably worse than hers

And then there's competative grandparenting.

My Mum's first cousin told my Mum that one of her grandchildren was training to be a Dr. I thought it unlikely as the girl in question didn't stay on at school to take A levels, but went to college to do a Art Course. Turns out that she dropped the art course after a year or so and is doing some science access course, from there she hopes to get into Uni to do a Science Foundation course and then to take a Medicine degree to be a Dr.

Close.

Sitting in doctor's waiting room an elderley lady next to me picked up a magazine. "Oh look", she cried, "a picture of my daughter!". Sure enough there was a photo of her daughter on the page (well I suppose it was!). The daughter was the editor of the magazine so has her picture at the front of every issue, so no surprise to her mum really. I guess the showing off doesn't stop when they are no longer toddlers!

The competitive stress thing kills me! Especially as I don't really "do" stress. I'm a potter around the house type. I bake, take long baths, and read thick novels with a steaming cup of tea almost every day. :o So I'm a really good person to have around when the convo turns to who has the most stress, because I always lose and it makes everyone feel better about themselves.

Friend: Oh, I'm beyond stressed. DD has a dance recital tomorrow and I've got to switch three meetings tomorrow to make it!

Friend 2: Oh don't even tell me about it! DS is getting a cold, I can tell, and I can not take off a day, I absolutely can't! The deadline I'm under is ridiculous.

Then they ask me what I'm doing and I tell them that DS and I might walk to the library if I manage to get us out of our pajamas before noon. :o I can practically see them thinking, "my life might be stressful but at least it's not boring like Cheerful's!" To each their own, y'know? Some people thrive on the craziness, I'm just not one of them. :)

Kiki I think that story's cute!