Refused a table at restaurant for having kids

[marissac]

I'm thinking of going to my local news paper to name and shame this restaurant, but would like your wise opinion on it before I do.

Today was the eve of Chinese New Year, my friends decided we should have lunch at a certain Chinese restaurant in Canary Wharf to celebrate. They et extremely busy at lunchtimes so I phoned ahead to make a reservation. Greeted by the maitre d with usual formalities, asked me what time I would like the table for etc. Then when I said it was for a party of 4 adults and 3 kids he paused. Then proceeded to tell mr they were fully booked for lunch today and that they will jot be able to fit us in AT ALL (which was strange since he was asking for my name time and phone number just a minute ago). Then I heard a female voice in the background say that there is a table free until 2, to which I immediately replied I'll take it, we will be done and your table vacated no later than 1:30.

Lo and behold this male waiter then said "don't take this the wrong way, but many customers have complained about noisy children during lunch like it's a party. We get a lot of business people here at lunchtimes. We don't mind children on the weekends, just not during the week." (please note these aren't his EXACT words in the exact order)

I could NOT believe what I heard. And to paint a clearer picture, this is our local Chinese restaurant which we have frequented roughly once a week for the past 3 yrs. Talk about biting the hand that feeds you. I will sure be taking my business elsewhere, but would like everyone to be aware of the appalling attitude and service. My kids are never rowdy or unruly, yet they are being talked about like they animals that should be left on a leash tied to a lamppost.

Sorry for the rant. I'm still fuming. Do you think it's worth going to local press? Thanks for listening and for any input.

How and why are there crawling babies on the floor in restaurants? That's so dangerous and an accident waiting to happen.

If I've misunderstood then I apologise but if not, I can't understand how any parent would allow their baby/child to wander away from them at any point. It's not my idea of a well behaved child nor responsible parenting. Sorry if that offends but I'm just completely foxed that some think it's ok.

To the poster that mentioned children needing to learn how to behave in restaurants; the restaurant that the OP referred to is family-friendly at the weekend. They can learn then can't they?

Haven't read all the replies, but I don't understand why it's acceptable to treat children like second class citizens. If the restaurant refused to serve disabled or old people, there would be outrage. The most disruption I've had while dining has been from drunk, loud adults.

slhilly, I'm rather heartened to hear that Le Manoir is so child-friendly! DP and I went while I was pg and we'd love to go back again sometime (have to save up first though!). If we can take DD with us, even better! You mention a kids menu - was your LO a paying customer not just a babe in arms?

OP, sorry for the hijack...

comixminx, I'm afraid I can't remember if we paid for the DCs. They got homemade fish goujons plus lovely veg, chocolate ice cream that was a lot nicer than my excellent dessert, and lots of smiles and cuddles from staff who were clearly a lot less worried about the risks than three of the posters on this thread!

YANBU, It really irritates me when people assume children will create a mess and be noisy and unrully in a restaurant. My 4 Dcs most certainly do not behave like angels all the time but in resataurants their behaviour is spot on because they know if they play up it will be their last meal out. There is 4 of them with just me and DH and we manage to keep them on the quiet side of things. Surely when there is a ratio like in OP of 3 Dcs for 4 adults the risk is minimal for things to get out of hand?

I also agree with poster on first page (sorry forgot name) who mentions aboutthis resataurant being happy to take the customer's money when it suits them.

I would not go to the papers but I would certainly never attempt to go back there and would not advertise for them either.

I think that's very wrong.

I suspect the paper won't be interested if the restaurant ever advertise, they won't want to jepodise advertising revenue.

I hope get somewhere with a letter to the management.

OP, YABU. Business people are VERY BUSY AND IMPORTANT. They need a child free environment, in which to be drunken and loud, and talk utter bollocks. How dare you think your money is as good as theirs?!

I would write to the manager, making it clear you won't be giving them custom anymore, and that you will be telling your firneds, etc. If it is a family friendly place at the weekend, they won't want that.

If you don't like it, vote with your wallet. But TBH I think YABU. As other posters said... Some places are child-free at certain times and it's for the best.

I don't think that there would be a problem if parents made sure that their DCs behaved in a appropriate manner in a restaurant, unfortunately some don't and that gives a bad name for all DCs.

"CockularDepravity Wed 02-Feb-11 22:29:11
I've heard it all now. Sue them? On what possible grounds could one instigate proceedings against the restaurant? Your response should be entertaining, if showing an utter misunderstanding of legal concepts and practice."

While I agree with you...did you intend that to sound so condescending??

Choogirl I think so. They have the best Dim Sum.

The other one that has been mentioned is rubbish.

The thing is RC has rooms or has an area they usually put kids, so I'm a bit surprised.

Children learn how to behave in restaurants by first of all behaving whilst eating a meal at home. I find few people nowdays get their children to sit round a table, have a meal and make sure they behave.

Both my brother and I were brought up with very strict table manners and could be taken anywhere from about 4/5 years old. Our children are now the same.

Most places on the continent accept children because their children have been brought up to behave at the table. I have travelled extensively and I have never seen non tourists children behave like some children behave here in restaurants.

BTW, some drunken customers may be loud and sexist; but I have never seen adults running round tables, screaming and crying.

So yes, it is perfectly reasonable to exclude children.

Sorry - not read all thread, but just to comment on your "people will never think to take their kids to Nobu or the Berkeley." - my son was taken to Nobu, when he was about 2-3, by his v rich American godfather. No-one complained, AFAIK.

I'm not clear why you didn't explain to the man on the phone that you were regulars and they would lose tour custom, rather than telling us on here.

Personally, if they didn't want my custom, I'd vote with my feet and go elsewhere. Their loss.

I am surprised it was this restaurant as well...I have been taking my DD there since she was about 2 months old and they have always been lovely to her. This includes some dim sum lunches during the 'business' week. I have always thought they were very child-friendly. Really odd.

Im just aghast at the arrogant fool who thinks letting a baby crawl around a restaurant is acceptable and i'll put money on people like her being one of the reasons so many places refuse kids- because of simple arrogant parents who cba to control their kids. I really am shocked someone is arguing their right to let a baby crawl all over a restaurant? Is this a joke?

skimummy perhaps the restaurant did realise who the OP is and it is her children they didn't want eating there during the week.

YANBU to be a bit put out but YABU to be 'fuming'. At the weekend, they allow children because they are not busy. During the week, they don't want children taking seats that would otherwise be occupied by fully paying customers who may also be ordering alcoholic drinks. This is understandable. Now that you know, you can choose to go elsewhere. FWIW, I ALWAYS ask when making a reservation whether children are welcome, I do not expect to bring DD everywhere. But then I am the sort of person who appreciates child free time...

That's why we avoid taking dd 3.11 years to restaurants if we can as she is not capable of sitting still at table at home, she has some dev delay so her behaviour is quite young, despite my disciplining her. Eating is not her fav activity at the best of times.

They shouldn't have turned you away. Would go to another restaurant in future. Read in the news that business class is going to be child free on some flights & plane companies. What is it with this child free policy.
Once we were turned away from a restaurant when we were with our kids. No problem we told them we'll go some place else.

Gemsys83, "arrogant fool" is a personal attack, which is expressly forbidden by the rules of this Board, and you have also not read what I wrote.

Who said anything about letting "a baby crawl all over a restaurant"? I certainly didn't. In fact, I explicitly said, "We got up to retrieve the baby when they crawled too far away." For the avoidance of doubt, that meant a distance of about 2 metres from the table - and thus nowhere close to other tables or diners.

It was Le Manoir and Galvin, fgs! Neither of them is like a busy Carluccios, with lots of people rushing round. They are relaxed, calm and friendly places. (So quite different to AIBU.)

More to the point: if the restaurant doesn't have a problem, the parents don't have a problem, the other diners don't have a problem, and the child is unscathed...why do you?

Who cares where it was and how posh it was- all that proves is money cannot buy common sense! They more than likely 'dont have a problem with it' as they are getting rich at the hands of fools like yourself so wouldnt dare tell you look woman use your brain and dont let kids crawl around a restaurant!

You also said waiters had to walk around/step over your crawling precious...thats just complete arrogance why should people doing their job have to walk over/around your child because it doesnt suit you to restrain them?

I agree with LeQueen. You make your children behave in an appropriate manner or you don't take them. They don't get down and walk around, unless there is a play area.