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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be really shocked that someone who I always see as highly intelligent etc

153 replies

icarriedawatermelon2 · 31/01/2011 20:59

can so so so so ignorant when it comes to car seats and safety?

At work today. Chatting over lunch about keeping my youngest son rear facing. Much respected work mate, who is so bright and intelligent literally mocks me for being OTT and revealing that he drives with his 7 year old on sofa cushion if he forgets her booster seat (no high back, just basic booster) and wouldn't in a million years keep a toddler rear facing as they are too demanding and need to see where they are going!

Then the whole room joins in with "Oh in my day we didn't have seats etc etc"

"x£ on a car seat you must be mad etc"

Left work feeling a bit crap to be honest :(

OP posts:
McHobbes · 31/01/2011 21:16

Hear hear Buzz.

Gleekfreak · 31/01/2011 21:18

I meant child death in crashes due to internal decapitation not child death per se!

SecretNutellaFix · 31/01/2011 21:19

Stealth- I believe the words missed out there were "in road traffic accidents".

Swedish accident research has shown that rearward facing children?s car seats reduce serious injuries by 92%, compared to 60% in forward facing seats.

thisisyesterday · 31/01/2011 21:20

buzzlightbeer this isn't an argument over cheap vs expensive seats though is it?

it's an argument between using a car seat or not.
this man uses a cushion instead of a booster seat... pointless.
why put your child at risk just because you can't be bothered to spend another £15 on a booster seat or however much they cost?
it's ridiculous

and the argument that "we never used them and we were fine" is stupid too. beucase a LOT more children died in accidents- precisely because they didn't have seats

as a matter of fact, rear-facing seats will fit in pretty much any car. I don't see the Swedes/Norwegians etc all having different cars to us over here.... and I know 2 people who have fitted ERF seats into a ford ka and a mini!

I agree that some people can't afford a more expensive seat, and I think it's disgusting that car seat manufacturers make their safest seats too pricey for the majority of people to afford.
but you are wrong if you think that the cheap car seats are as safe. you only have to look at crash test results, inc Which? reports to see that this simply is not true.

bubblewrapped · 31/01/2011 21:20

I would never let a child travel in my car without a restraint.

However, the main reason that deaths in RTA's has significantly reduced over the years is due to safer cars on the road that can withstand crashes. A ridiculously expensive booster seat is not going to save a childs life any more than a cheaper one really.

FabbyChic · 31/01/2011 21:23

How do you get a rear facing seat in the back of a car bearing in mind you cannot have a baby seat in the front as it is illegal?

RealityIsKnockedUp · 31/01/2011 21:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BillComptonstrousers · 31/01/2011 21:24

I'm obviously being very stupid, as my children are older, but where does a 2 year old put their legs in a rear facing seat? Surely they are all squashed up?

silverfrog · 31/01/2011 21:25

thisisyesterday: I had my RF seat in an Audi A2, where it actually fitted bettr than in a Volvo XC90.

I also measured it for fitting in: a mini cooper (ok, but buggy didn't fit int he boot), a Smart ForFour (same), and several other small-medium sized cars (Fiesta sized, say)

all were fine.

agree that the "we were all fine without them" argument is pointless.

we were all fine wihtout rear seatbelts too, but no one argues against those

thisisyesterday · 31/01/2011 21:25

fabbychic i really don't understnad your question. what has not having a baby seat in the front got to do with it?

reality because a cushion will compress and become very flat underneath the child. it won't raise it up very much at all. so they may as well not use it

a booster seat is rigid and will keep the child in the correct position so that s/he is offered maximum protection from the seatbelt

sandyballs · 31/01/2011 21:26

A two rear old in a rear facing seat?!! Where the hell do their legs go? I just can't imagine mine doing that!

SecretNutellaFix · 31/01/2011 21:26

No, because it keeps moving. It is not stable enough to do the job.

thisisyesterday · 31/01/2011 21:27

i have a pic on my profile of my (then) 2 yr old in a RF seat... loads of leg space

JetLi · 31/01/2011 21:27

I tried rear facing but it blocked my view of the blind spot. How do you get round that TIY? I have the seat fitted on the left of the car so that I'm not hoiking DD out into the road. With the seat rear facing & her installed I could see jack shit out of the back window & couldn't trust that I wouldn't take a cyclist out or something as a result.

silverfrog · 31/01/2011 21:27

Fabby: not sure I understand the question, sorry. why owuld an infant rear facing seat not allowed on a front seat mean a RF toddler seat is hard ot get in the front?

Bill: there is more space in a RF toddler seat than a RF infant seat. or the child crosses it's legs (very comfortable, actually, and less wriggling form dd2 who can do this than form dd1 who is in a high backed booster with ehr feet unsupported as she can't reach the floor - horribly uncomfortable I should think)

thisisyesterday · 31/01/2011 21:30

JetLi, ours has reduced visibility but only very slightly, I just have to move my head a bit more.

that has reminded me though that I was going to look into those little extra mirrors you can get to attach onto the wing mirror.
We'll be swapping ours a bit soon anyway so hopefully will be better!

pigletmania · 31/01/2011 21:34

YANBU to worry about car safety, but YABU regarding the 7 year old. Some 7 year olds are as tall as adults so it depends on the hight of the child not the age. They do not need a high back booster at 7, a simple booster seat will suffice.

ENormaSnob · 31/01/2011 21:36

FFS

slightlymad72 · 31/01/2011 21:37

The law states that a child upto 135cm or 12 years of age (which ever comes first) MUST use the correct child restraint. The only exceptions to that rule are
Under 3 years of age in a taxi if there is no restraint available
Over 3 years if there is no appropriate child restraint then the adult must be worn but only if the one of the following 3 exemptions apply.
1 in a taxi or private liscensed vehicle
2 if the child is travelling a short distance of unexpected necessity
3 if there are 2 occupied child restraints in the rear which prevents the fitment of a third.
when the child has reached 135cm/12 years then an adult belt can be used.

A cushion is not suitable for a child restraint, 1 it does not place the child at a suitable height for the adult belt to be used correctly, 2 it can very easy slip out from under the child during breaking or when they wiggle, making the adult belt even more dangerous to them.

And because you use to travel without belts years ago does not make it right.

thisisyesterday · 31/01/2011 21:39

I now have a pic on my profile of ds2 in the Britax seat (he is 3yrs 3 months now)

FabbyChic · 31/01/2011 21:41

How do you get the seat in the back rear facing? What about the childs legs?

Its a legitimate question? I cannot see how it would work. My kids are 21 and 17 so I've no idea. What if you had a toddler?

BringOnTheGoat · 31/01/2011 21:44

YANBU - mocking you for being OTT was pathetic - is just a difference of opinion. Maybe he's one of those 'cool' parents who doesn;t care about piffle like child safety Hmm

YAB too sensitive though - why did it make you feel crap - who gives a chuff what they think!?!

mylifewithstrangers · 31/01/2011 21:45

Fabby, it is not illegal to have a baby seat in the front unless there is an active airbag. I often had mine in a rear-facing seat in the front I just deactivated the airbag. The safest place is in the back though.

We also have a ERF seat up to 4 years. It has plenty of room for feet, there is actually a gap between the seat and the back of the car seat where they can put their legs, though mostly they seem to cross their legs at the edge of the seat.

There is so little info about ERF that most people are blissfully ignorant of the issues. This makes the ERF camp seem over-precious, and also implies a criticism of others who don't ERF. Hopefully there will be a gradual shift to it becoming more mainstream, and less cuckoo!

Your colleague was being willfully ignorant with the cushion situation though Angry

silverfrog · 31/01/2011 21:46

just the same as you do for an infant rear facing carrier.

the seat sits higher up, so there is space between the seat and the backrest of the car's actual seat, unlike for an infant carrier.

and the child can always cross their legs (happily and comfortbaly)

dd2 is still rear facing at coming up to four. and will be for a year or so yet, going by her weight.

dd1 is huge, and was also rear facing until she was nearly 4 (vvvv tall, huge feet. no issues with being in a rear facing seat)

LunarRose · 31/01/2011 21:47

Wow just looked at the photos there is no way I could get DS into that a year ago let alone now!! Sod the legs just the general getting in and out!!!