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So angry i can barely speak

125 replies

brightlightsandpromises · 28/01/2011 13:07

So i will type instead.

My not so DD was on facebook this am, put something on her status indicating she was upset about something. (DD is 20 and doesn't live at home btw) I ask her what is wrong - fuck off she tells me. Nice!! Anyway, brief background, she doesn't havea job and my mum pays her to walk her dog for her - I used to walk him but i stopped when i got a job. My job didn't work out but i just let DD carry on with it because i didnt feel comfortable taking money from my mum and it never stopped with the dog walking, there was always, "while you're here can you pop to the town for me etc etc" She basically takes the piss, but you know how it is, its my mother, what can you do. So now my DD is the one who my mum thinks doesn't have a life so can run after her all the time - well, if DD got a job then she woudlnt be able to (different story). So after being told to fuck off, i was already Angry i said WTF is going on, my mum had already been on phone to me asking for number for boiler company, spoke to me like shit, clearlly in bad mood. So DD tells me im lazy don't do anything for nanny etc. Her cat been in the vets all this week, DD been doing the tooing and froing, i thought ah good, because i am mid tax return hell and im pretty preoccupied just now. But anyway, my mother obviously been slagging me off to dd as the stuff she said is stuff that my mum rings me and slags DD off to me.

Then phone rings, "what are you doing" says my mum, "sorting tax return out" "Well i cant get the fucking cat to the vets and its half dead (its not) and ive got to wait for the gas man" I said, well had you phoned me and asked me i woudl have taken her to the vets for you "oh dont worry about it" and slammed the phone down. So i have to fucking drop everything to take the cat to the vets, - which i dont mind, really i dont, it was my cat anyway in the first place - but why the hell do i get spoken to like shit by my mother AND DD!!! I am seething.

Ive just taken the cat to the vets, my mother trying to back track because i told her she has been slagging me off to DD. She says i only go there when i want something - not true. I do avoid her alot of the times because she moans on about shit and is difficult (like Catherine tates nanna but more malevolent) to put up with. Last weekend i ASKED her to come out with me and DD2 (aged 5) because i thought that she hadn't seen her for a bit, DP was working and i thought she woudl like to have the opportunity, but no, i only ever go there when i want something FFS.

What is wrong with, when you want/need something - phoning someone and asking them, it would have been much easier for me if she rang this morning and said, oh the cats still not eating would you mind taking her to the vets for me. Instead i had to break my stride in what i was doing and go just now. I am supposed to read her mind, she was even on he phone earlier to me moaning about the woman from the boiler company who was apparently "rude" errr, well if she spoke the her the way she spoke to me, if i were the woman from the bioler company i would have told her to fuck off! I am pre occupied due to tax return {stressed out about it) so i didnt ask after the cat.

Upset that DD spoke to me like that, but just steaming with my mother. She fascilitates my DD not getting a job because she gives her money all the time, and then thinks she is at her beck and call. What has happened today is that DD pissed off, didnt want to take the cat etc, so i end up getting shit on. FFS

OP posts:
mumbar · 28/01/2011 15:37

Can't believe your getting such a flaming.

Take out the swearing and what you have is:

a DD who posted a I'm annoyed on facebook

A caring mum who rang to find out the problem and got sworn at. Left confused.

Same mum getting on with something important when her mum rings and wants help with something - and doesn't ask nicely. Then adds another barage of acussations t try and make OP feel bad. Despite actually taking up offers when they're there.

Personally I think if your going to have a cat and a dog you do need to be able to look after them yourself or be prepared to/ and also pay for others help with said pets. If they can't help say, because they have a life, then you need to re-evaluate having the pets.

mumbar · 28/01/2011 15:38

despite not

jasminetom · 28/01/2011 15:42

No you are perfectly entitled to feel hurt. Whatever the ins and outs it is always horrible to feel that people are talking about you and particularly when it is your family.

Hullygully · 28/01/2011 15:42

Lot of smug gits on MN these days.

McHobbes · 28/01/2011 15:54

Wow. I am astonished, absolutely astonished at the hard time the OP is getting because the word fuck was uttered within her four walls. Shock

For what it's worth...if anyone rang me up with the expectation that I have nothing else to do than dance to their tune...I would tell them to fuck off too. But then, I'm like that....and by the standards some of you have set, that would make my family dysfunctional and in need of a good talking to by Jezza.

OP - not surprised you were cross. Your mum was out of order. x

southmum · 28/01/2011 15:57

OP ignore the sanctimonious comments.

Just because people tell each other to fuck off in the heat of the moment doesnt mean they need education or counselling as some one posted before FFS.

Hopelesslydisorganised · 28/01/2011 16:03

Nice to see so many smug perfect people here. May life smack you right between the eyes one day so you feel some reality.

OP I hope things settle down - rant away if it helps.

Oh and my 8 year old autistic son swears at me sometimes. I can assure you I have NEVER sworn at him.

FanellaFudge · 28/01/2011 16:08

I was trying to be helpful.

Lulumaam · 28/01/2011 16:10

glad Dp's business going well x

I am agog at the smuggery and the intimation that anyone using foul language is worth of Jezza Kyle show

kenobi · 28/01/2011 16:10

FWIW swearing didn't bother me either. And it's not chavvy to swear - what about the fucking Fulfords?

Anyway hope you feel better over the w/e.

Crystaldolphin · 28/01/2011 16:10

There are some right smug t*ats on this thread, really horrible.

chitchatinsantasear · 28/01/2011 16:12

Well you might try a bit harder next time, and without the attitide.

is hardly what I would call helpful.

FanellaFudge · 28/01/2011 16:13

Thanks Mum.

FanellaFudge · 28/01/2011 16:14

She's stressed about the tax return - an accountant would resolve that.

I'm stressed about housework - I've now got a cleaner to resolve that.

See - helpful.

chitchatinsantasear · 28/01/2011 16:14

Oh, obnoxious too, the trifecta. Well done!

Crystaldolphin · 28/01/2011 16:17

Or maybe just the "sheep" mentality ? The first person who replied was trying to be clever nasty so everyone who came after followed on. Deary me.

usualsuspect · 28/01/2011 16:21

Ignore the smug fuckers ...fucking families Grinyou can't do right for doing wrong sometimes

have a large Friday night glass of wine later

softpaw · 28/01/2011 16:21

why does everyone turn round before they say everything?

rolandweary · 28/01/2011 16:30

god what a weird reaction to a thread!

OP I have no idea why so many Pollyannas have congregated on your thread for a good old smug-up

but I would be thoroughly upset and angry in your shoes and you are being treated really badly by your mother and your dd

I would withdraw from them both for a bit having politely but firmly explained why

it sounds as though they are feeding one another's hysterical rude tantrums and you are the punchbag in the middle

I have had that job myself and it is a whole world of no fucking fun

my sympathies

softpaw · 28/01/2011 16:34

is anyone still there?

softpaw · 28/01/2011 16:37

hi,this is my first try at this..where do i see the immediate replies? if any?!

chitchatingagain · 28/01/2011 16:40

You can see them straight away. I'm afraid I can't understand your earlier question.

softpaw · 28/01/2011 16:46

thanks chit..i obviously have no patience! i'm a computer luddite,but trying.

softpaw · 28/01/2011 16:56

brightlights..how are you feeling now after all these reactions?

softpaw · 28/01/2011 17:06

chit..the figure of speech..i turned around and said..he just turned around and said etc..where's that come from?