to wonder what the fuss is regarding Private Schools?

[peppapigandhumf]

A friend has 2 kids at a local prep school. She doesnt really bang on about the school to me etc but i wonder why bother pay for education when schooling is free.

Is it really just about small class sizes and fancy expensive uniforms?

You said it would be helpful to find a single example. I found two deaths and a horrific stabbing with just a quick google for my local borough. They weren't the only ones though, there were more.

Would you honestly send your child to schools like that if you could afford private education?

at the idea there are less drugs/dealers in private than state.

Yes, very very unlikely Soupdragon. You found some examples. One of those being that a group of people came into the school.

These are horrific.

I agree. But the fact remains that people who use the private sector vastly over exaggerate the crime in state schools.

I went to a private school - there were drugs there was bullying there was intense pressure and lots of eating disorders there was teacher: pupil relationships ( yes, plural). All of this was swept under the carpet - imagine the illusion was broken - then no-one really would bother wasting their money.

And really do you think segregation is the answer to the small amount of crime in the state sector - does this solve the problem for you or make an attempt to look at a wider problem ?

Save your breath soupdragon.

For some posters, generalisations about state schools are scooped up and derided, yet you can make generalisations about private without any comment.

Entrenched positions.
Inflexible thinking.

By Ruthie:
'I actually think the uniform is very important as they look so much smarter and can take pride in themselves and identify with the school.

I would never ever send my child to a state school no matter what sacrifices we might have to make. I love them and want what's best for them and I don't believe the state can provide that.'

'I've seen the children and they look a mess! I can't believe anyone would choose state over private, no. I know it's quite a volatile subject as the people sending their children to state school are very defensive as they must feel terribly guilty.'

What utterly foolish, ignorant posts! What unintelligent generalisations you make. I suggest that you don't presume to understand what other people think/ feel. You have the sort of attitude that makes people generalise (unfairly) about parents who choose to send their DCs to private school.

Gmajor- just ignore :) She is either a fool or being deliberately inflammatory.

I have not made any generalisations about private schools. In fact I have argued that the generalisations about private schools are simply an illusion.

What generalisations, Litchick?

Oh come on Ladyblabla.

I love a good debate, but that's just taking the piss

You tell us your anecdotes of going to public school and how awful it was on every thread about this.

You applaud anyone who says anything good about state schools and make assumptions about private school parents' reasons etc.

I don't blame you, it's what you believe...and good on you...but come on.

And you joan and seeker if she's around.

You make Xenia look reasonable.

But I make anecdotes about how I went to state school, Litchick, and how it was awful. Riddle me that one!

I will say again. Private school parents seem to keep coming out with the line 'I think it is best for my child and I am happy with my decision', as if that seals the deal. I don't think that it does.

Like with that OP this morning saying she's learned not to be anti-private school because she's been to see one and it was lovely! That's like telling a committed vegetarian that his moral code would evaporate the moment he ate some veal! This refusal to frame the thing in terms of principle and only to want to look at in terms of YOUR kids is irritating.

I have signed up to make this comment after being away for a while. I was on a coffe break and thought I would take a look and see how you all are. Nothing changes does it, the same old people loop around saying the same things.

Lets just assume that you are right. Private schools are better than state. You are certain that you have a better deal and that the rest us 93% are sending our children to schools where they are likely to get stabbed. If you are right isn't it a little rude to go around shouting about how much better off you are than the rest of the world. Do you also go out into the street and bellow about how much bigger your house is ? Do you constantly tell people they have a crap car compared to you ? You are horrible horrible people and a massive advert against sending a child to private school.

If you are so sure then have the grace to go away and be smug about it in private.

Sure, its irritating when people won't frame their arguments in terms of your principles. Some parents main principle when choosing a school may be 'I refuse to pretend to be religious'. For many others it is, 'my primary responsibility is my children, I will do what I think is best for them'. You may vehemently disagree with them but that doesn't necessarily mean they are not acting from considered principles.

Litchick I'm not sure if they're pissed or a couple of nutters - the only thing I'm sure of is that, like Seeker, they're a few cards short of a Full Deck.

Seeker one of just a few sane people left on this forum.

joan I admire your conviction and that of lady and seeker.

You are right not to swerve from it.
You think private schooling is inherently wrong.
That is your perogative.

But that is very different from some of the nonsense that gets spouted...

And I think you accommodate, if not actively take part in some of the nonsense because it supports your position.

Methinks Ruthie is just playing, being an archetype. I hope so at least.

geton A quick search will reveal much shameless boasting about salaries, cars, houses etc.etc. all from people who then say 'ooh but I'm NOT middle class ooooh no!'

I don't begrudge affluent people, but please don't make me feel shit because I don't share your good fortune. I am doing muy best.

I'm no Nancy Drew, but I think you've got it.

Being middle class has nowt to do with income.

"make assumptions about private school parents' reasons etc."

I actually don't need to make assumptions - these threads are littered with reasons why people send their children to private school(small class size, facilities, mixing with like minded people bla bla bla). Most of which I happen to think are ridiculous and do make massive assumptions about state school.

The phrase "singing from the same song sheet" makes me want to vomit.

The op asked a direct question.

To which she received a direct response.

Should we have made up replies to save others feelings?

Going back to the OP, it's something that I often wonder, too. There are lots of good schools where we are, all over-subscribed of course. Those who choose private may be doing us all a favour by allowing the catchment areas for good state schools to be a bit bigger!
Yes smaller class sizes would be nice,but I prefer my dc to meet a cross-section of society, not be cloistered in a privileged world where they would be amongst the least well-off! (This happened to my mum at one stage; she was the only one without a pony!)

Not at all...but some posters have insinuated that us less well off folk don't love/care for our children. Out of order imo.

Also I have never met any working class people who own 4x4s and detached houses, so I'm afraid I do believe that class and money are linked (seperate debate though!!).