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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

children standing up in trolleys in supermarkets.....

152 replies

kelway · 16/01/2011 23:38

just wondered how other people felt when they see a women pushing a trolley around a supermarket with their sprog standing in the trolley? my point is that i would never have allowed my dd to do that as that is where you/other people put your food (there could be dogs muck on their shoe). have seen this more and more lately. i can understand the odd situation that might require this ie ill child too tired to walk or something tragic like that but the kids i have seen look fine (if not a little spoilt) to me

OP posts:
Lamorna · 17/01/2011 10:59

I hope that all the people who think this is OK go onto the 'shoes in the house' thread and say that it is rude to ask guests to take their shoes off. If you think guests should remove their shoes, but allow your DC to stand in your trolley you are being deeply hypocritical!

Confuzzeled · 17/01/2011 11:04

Have any of ever seen the food getting delivered? Seriously, I think toddler feet in the trolly are the least of our worries.

I do this all the time. DS 17mo goes in the seat (only 1 seat) and dd 3yo goes in the other seat if there is one or SITS in the trolly if not.

Last year, dd was walking next to me in the supermarket and a kid pushed a trolly right into her. Her tooth went through her lip, blood everywhere, screaming, the works. The kid was about 9 or 10, the mother was mortified. The kid just wanted to push the trolly, the mum was just doing what she had to do to get through the shop. Since then DD sits in the trolly if there is no other option. She's small and people don't see kids in front of their trollys.

Oh I'm not a dog person, I think people who let their dogs crap on the street should not be aloud to keep animals.

YankNCock · 17/01/2011 11:11

I'd be much more worried about the kid falling out of the trolley and hurting themselves. Trolleys sit outside and get all kinds of stuff on them, can't imagine what is on my DS's shoes is any worse!

jeanz · 17/01/2011 11:12

its not just the "food going in after dirty shoes aspect" its not very safe for the children is it? they can topple out etc etc why not sit em in the seat???Confused

mummypud · 17/01/2011 11:28

I have always hated it, i ahte the whole shoes in the trolley thing, but i am a bit obsessive... however as a mum i know that at times you will do anything for a bit of piece and quiet, i have a very well behaved child who can turn into a nightmare down the aisles and sometimes you just do anything for an easy life! x

mummypud · 17/01/2011 11:29

sorry for my awful typing¬!! i meany peace

SlightlyTubbyHali · 17/01/2011 11:48

What are these children who topple out of trolleys doing? I mean, they are fairly deep and so unless the child is old and tall surely toppling shouldn't be an issue? And as they're right in front of you you can tell them to sit down/not climb or whatever. Or is it that parents put their kids in and then leave them parked next to the chocolate while they go off to load up on cereal?

BuzzLightBeer · 17/01/2011 11:56

If I didn't put my 3 year old in the front part of the trolley sometimes we would probably starve to death.

Suncottage · 17/01/2011 12:05

When I worked in dentistry I personally saw four children who had toppled out of shopping trollies and put their top teeth through their bottom teeth and other similar injuries.

Supermarket floors are hard and supermarket trollies are erratic at the best of times.

Keep kids out of them unless they are in the proper seats.

Suncottage · 17/01/2011 12:06

Ooops 'bottom lip' I should have typed.

DanceInTheDark · 17/01/2011 12:06

Scenario 1: DS1 walks by side of the trolley occasionally doing the "Can I have...." speech,
DS2 in the shopping trolley sitting, singing to himself surrounded by my shopping but only half a shop because he is in the way
DS3 in the seat of the trolley.

Get to the end of the shop only mildly annoyed because of weight of buggy and amount of "Can i have's", load conveyor, pack bags and go.

All safe.

Scenario 2
DS1 and DS3 as above.

DS2 starts off fine holding the trolley, then he does his leaning thing which pushes the trolley into display/toddler/other shoppers. Then he runs away meaning i either leave the other 2 to go get him or charge around the shop. Then he has to touch everything he passes and smell a lot of them. Then all the colours and noise over loads his senses and he starts to make one of his noises, which gets louder and is constant and then he lags behind and then he runs off again, then he moans because they have changed the packaging on his favourite cereal/fruit/snack/whatever and it's not right, but then that moan turns into a melt down because it means his whole world is now Not Right. He refuses to move but it's not a tantrum - he is scared and confused. I end up dragging him so i can get away from the Stares and finish the shop because i have left it until the cupboards are bare. Then he gets cross and the hitting starts, not just me but his 2 brothers who, whilst behaving age appropriatly, hit back which escalates which means that by aisle 4 i am already stressed.

Get to the conveyor and DS2 has to again touch it which means he gets in the way of the unloading of the trolley. Which causes delays and the person behind is tutting and the shopping is piling up at the other end. Try and pack and he keeps running away so you chuck everything into the trolley, ignoring the pleas of "But i was good please get me a chocolate".

That's not all. Half way round i usually realise that he has soiled. Can't change him because i can't fit in the toilet with the others. Getting out of the door he runs again but this time there is the car park and the main road. Leave the door store amidst the muttering of "she's a shouty mother/she looks stressed/he needs a smack"

Still feel the same about children in the trolley?

(DS2 is being assessed for ASD, it's not case of if, it's a case of where is he on the spectrum)

DanceInTheDark · 17/01/2011 12:08

Ages would have helped. DS1 is 7 DS2 5 and DS3 2. ALthough DS2 is small for his age, he is too big for the seat.

ChippingInSmellyCheeseFreak · 17/01/2011 15:31

DanceInTheDark - can you shop on line? I think if I was in your situation it would probably be the only way we'd eat. Frankly I'm more suprised that I don't see more mothers like you sitting in the trolly crying! Feck the shoes in the trolley!

Lamorna - when the supermarkets start paying thousands of pounds to have each trolley carpeted and kept inside and clean - you may have a point - until then your comment is just bonkers.

melikalikimaka · 17/01/2011 15:41

I used to get DS1 into the trolley seat aged 6, he was a nightmare around shops. Then stopped taking him.

mjovertherainbow · 17/01/2011 15:44

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Message withdrawn

The3Bears · 17/01/2011 15:47

How many times has this topic been done [yawn]

I dont like my ds doing this but when its the only way to get around a supermarket when its busy and I would rather him be there than running into people. I wouldnt look twice at anyone else doing it.

Some people need to get better things to think about :)

ALovelyBunchOfCoconuts · 17/01/2011 15:51

Have you nothing more serious to worry about OP?! Hmm

My DD stands/sits on the trolley. At least I know where she is and I don't have to worry about her running around causing mayhem pulling things off shelves when I just want to get my shopping, pay and get the hell out. Wouldn't want her getting in people's way and getting knocked over. If you are so bothered about 'dirty shoes' why don't you take yourself some disinfected polythene to lay down in the bottom of the trolley so your bread rolls don't get dirty.

ConnorTraceptive · 17/01/2011 15:51

I let mine do this even the six year old who is perfectly capable of walking nicely - meh

mumof2girls2boys · 17/01/2011 15:53

I did this once when I had a 16month old and a brand new baby, the supermarket didn't have a baby chair with toddler chair next to it trolley so had to put 16month old in trolley. He fell out cut his head open and the supermarket was not bothered at all, wanting to blame me for what I had done. I pointed out that with a DH away with work for 3 weeks and no suitable trolleys I had had to do this against my better judgement, suddenly they were sympathetic (really I just wanted some first aid for my DS). I don't know what I could have done different, I even had him on reigns in the trolley, so now I am a big advocate for not doing this and will tell parents so in the supermarket if I see them doing it. It is really not worth the risk.

giveitago · 17/01/2011 15:55

I'm 42 and if I could lift ds into a trolley I'd do it (but can't). LOL.

I don't see the problem unless kid is going bonkers and there's the danger of tipping trolley over.

Really don't see the issue. I grab the (waitrose) trolley from outside. It's had god knows what hands on it (adults) and I'm not going to worry about kids' feet given the trolly is usually stored outside with lots of adult hands being on them and everything I buy is either in packaging and I buy fruit in veg and oput the in bags and I wash the stuff when we use it.

ivykaty44 · 17/01/2011 15:57

My dad continually nags me to do this and I keep saying no, every time we go to the supermarket he asked - one day he even went to customer service to complain about me not allowing him to stand in the trolley - they just looked at him a little odd

Ariesgirl · 17/01/2011 15:59

What about when a man does it? Is this terrible too or is your ire just reserved for "a women"?

MyLifeIsChaotic · 17/01/2011 16:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ivykaty44 · 17/01/2011 16:04

Ariesgirls - no it is not on for men to do this, sitting in a trolley which for most men is far far to small is just silly - the only person I can think it wouldn't be funny is Ronnie Corbet

MotherJack · 17/01/2011 16:12

Ivykaty, you either just totally missed the point (if there had been one) or are very, very funny Grin