Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to get upset that my family forgot my kids' birthday??????????

44 replies

TwinMummy30 · 16/01/2011 19:04

today my kids are three and not even a single phone call, txt from my family!!!
they live abroad but that's not the reason that my whole family didn't bother to call.I have 2 sisters, one is married and has a 2 year old daughter and I've never forgotten to send a present and call her.i do not expect them to send me presents but at least happy birthday would be ok. i'm very upset and don't want to speak to them :(

OP posts:
ChippingInSmellyCheeseFreak · 16/01/2011 19:06

That's pretty shitty. Any chance it's to do with the time difference

OTTMummA · 16/01/2011 19:07

YANBU at all, i had this with DS and DH this year (dec + jan birthdays) from DH's side, and i am very Angry no phone call, card nadda.
So can i cry along with you? Sad

Doogle2 · 16/01/2011 19:09

YANBU. I would be really upset too. Is there a time delay? - perhaps there is still time for them to text. Perhaps you could text them and say what an exciting day you've had with your twins.
I am sorry they forgot but if they remembered last year then give them a second chance. I am sure they will feel awful once they realise.

warthog · 16/01/2011 19:09

don't worry - you're not alone. my siblings are older than me and had kids a lot younger than me. after many many years of remembering birthday, sending cards and presents etc. none of them remember my kids' birthdays.

bah!

ecobatty · 16/01/2011 19:10

Oh dear. I always forget the little ones' birthdays. Love them to bits, but just can't seem to remember when they were born.

I tend to get there by the time they are 20 or so....Blush

Some of us are just a bit rubbish that way, and time difference (if there is one) certainly doesn't help.

Doigthebountyeater · 16/01/2011 19:11

I've recently fallen out with my brother for this reason. They didn't even remember DS2's first birthday.

YouLittlePiggy · 16/01/2011 19:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 16/01/2011 19:12

ChippingInSmellyCheeseFrea there is only 1 hour difference and i just wanna cry now :(

OP posts:
Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 16/01/2011 19:20

they seem to forget only my kids :( last year til the time i put some pics on FB no one called, then they woke up from the deep sleep!!! and bothered to give me a buzz to call them!!!
OTTMummA, sure we can cry together.

OP posts:
ChippingInSmellyCheeseFreak · 16/01/2011 19:30

Sometimes you just have to face the fact that people are crap at remembering anything that doesn't affect them directly - sometimes they are just forgetful of dates (so might send something randomly in the year that the kids will like - even if it's just a postcard or something) and sometimes people actually don't care enough about anyone outside of themselves, their own partner & kids :(

It can be a real lesson in who is worth putting yourself out for and who isn't!

OTTMummA · 16/01/2011 19:58

Thanks TwinMummy, i've been trying to be breezy and nonchalant about it all, but really i have found it very unplesant and want to have a sob.
Thing is, i never, ever, forget a birthday, and love to get presents, cards etc for people,, so i just don't get it!

pollyblue · 16/01/2011 20:10

My 3 are my Mum's only grandchildren, their birthdays are quite close (dd1's tomorrow, twins end of the month). She's got their dates wrong and sent cards for the twins, but not dd1. I guess at least she remembered it was someone's birthday tomorrow! But I'm a bit grrrr that's she's got it wrong.....

monkeyflippers · 16/01/2011 20:17

Give it a week or so and then give them a call and say "you do know it was DCs bithday last week don't you". That way they will feel extra bad about it.

Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 17/01/2011 11:23

i'm sorry i didn't reply yesterday i was so upset and angry i can't even explain. i txted my sister and said a big thank you!!! from the twins for remembering them!!! and still no replay or any reaction!!! i know she has received the txt as the delivery report came. i spoke to my younger siser who is 20 and she didn't know what to say, not even sorry! oh, families.....

OP posts:
Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 17/01/2011 11:25

thanks everyone

OP posts:
monkeyflippers · 17/01/2011 11:38

I'm confused. You said thank you to your sister for remembering them, but she didnt did she? Was it a sarcastic text? Sorry if I'm being thick.

Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 17/01/2011 12:09

yes it was suppose to be sarcastic text. i'm trying to get over it but it really did spoil my relationship with them, so sad...

OP posts:
monkeyflippers · 17/01/2011 12:25

Maybe she didn't reply because she is rushing around getting a present first going "oh sht oh sht!"

Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 17/01/2011 12:47

haha, i don't think so, they all live far and i don't expect them to send any presents but at least "happy birthday" would be nice. i'm not gonna bother any more, maybe i'm not that important for them (never was though) but really didn't think they would forget the twins. i just have to live with it :(

OP posts:
ddubsgirl · 17/01/2011 13:26

no one on my side bothers with my kids,my brother cut us off last year but before that would forget my kids birthdays,i feel really bad for them as they are old enough to know he hasnt bothered with them.

monkeyflippers · 17/01/2011 13:31

Why were you never that important to them?

SnowIsFallingOnLee · 17/01/2011 13:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 17/01/2011 13:58

it's a very long story :(. that's why I left. when my kids were born things changed for better not for long :( never mind, I have now my own family, loving husband and my kiddies and this keeps me going.
ddubsgirl i'm dreading that moment i have to explain my kids why their grandparents don't care. take care and thanks for your replies.

OP posts:
C4ro · 17/01/2011 14:19

My BIL/SIL got my DD f**k all for Christmas. I'm not materialistic and that fact alone is not a problem. The issue is the email she sent us back in November with her 3 kids long wishlists full of expensive playmobil shite that we received in good time to get them all they wanted.
As it is my DH brother and his wife, I am not allowed to tell them to their faces exactly what I think of this bit of thoughtlessness either.

Original poster
TwinMummy30 · 17/01/2011 14:36

i know what you feel C4ro,we try our best to not to let them down and they don't bother. i bet if anyone forgot their kids birthdays, Christmas or whatever they celebrate they would come and tell you. this type of people sees only the tip of their nose, i think.

OP posts: