to get upset that my family forgot my kids' birthday??????????

[TwinMummy30]

today my kids are three and not even a single phone call, txt from my family!!!
they live abroad but that's not the reason that my whole family didn't bother to call.I have 2 sisters, one is married and has a 2 year old daughter and I've never forgotten to send a present and call her.i do not expect them to send me presents but at least happy birthday would be ok. i'm very upset and don't want to speak to them :(

I get Christmas presents for my newphew and niece, but can't even remember the dates of their birthdays.

I am a crap auntie.

That said, I never remember anyone's birthday. I was still unsure of DP's birthday after two years going out with him.

I don't mind a bit either when people forget mine...

I'm guilty of this all the time with DNs and DNs on my DPs side.

The onus seems to be on me to remember because I'm a SAHM and he's busy working, can't get to the shops as easily etc...however, before we were together he was just as rubbish as me at remembering. They do eventually get money/a present but it's always late. I love them to bits, though.
None of thier parents have ever made me feel bad, though, but I couldn't guarantee that they haven't slagged me off till the cows come home behind my back!

I can imagine it's very hurtful if you're a birthday person but it doesn't mean I don't love my niece and nephew and godchildren, just that I'm rubbish at this sort of thing.

I would be very upset to be cut out of someone's life because I forgot a birthday. I'm good at other things - moral support, listening ear, making people comfortable, lending stuff and not expecting it back (mainly because I forget - two sides of same coin) and I'm also a very generous Christmas pressie giver and give random pressies when I see them. Different people have different strengths. I'm not excusing your family, just saying that I wouldn't rush to punish them if they are good in other ways.

TwinMummy - In my case I am always astonished when people remember mine or DD's birthdays. I absolutely do not expect it. It's not about selfishness, just disorganisation.

i have always been the black sheep of the family,my mum died when i was 10 and dad remarried 14 months later,in that time i was kicked out by my step mum,i spent ages 11-16 living with a neighbour,foster parents & my brothers at 16 i got a studio flat and at 17 i met my oh,my dad died when i was 19,i have always been the one to keep contact with my side but now i just cant do it anymore as i said before my brother cut us off,i still dont know why,its all very hurtful esp for my kids more as they loved their uncle.

Sorry, missing first sentence there - I meant to say that I also forget everyone's birthdays.

with the risk of being flamed, i would like to say that I don't have children of my own, I am not busy in general day-to-day, and I have never, ever remembered my niece or nephews' birthdays without being reminded.

I forget every time (I can't even remember what date niece and nephew 3's dates are - although sis gave me a hint for nephew3 cos nephew2 and nephew3 are the same but reversed dates so now i can)

It's not because i'm callous, or mean or cruel, or don't care about them. I care very very deeply about all of them, but I have a very bad memory.
eg - i remember their birthday on the day of their birthday (if i look at a calendar or something else with the date on it), and cannot process the date two or 3 days before.

I have a running request with my family that I am reminded of the birthday 2 posting days prior to the birthday so I can sort out a present and send it.
DN's birthday is today- mum sent me the reminder yesterday. she'd spoken to me on Saturday but forgot to remind me then.
Of course, i texted my sis andtold her I'd already posted it. , and bought and sent it today. I will text him this evenign to wish him happy birthday.

( actually, that reminds me, that means mum's is in 2 days - must get her a pressie to send off tomorrow....)

ddubsgirl - that's horrendous!

i do understand that you may forget your nephew or niece's or some relatives but what my point is my parents have only three grandkids, the twins and my niece, my mums birthday is 8 days after the twins' so i think it's kinda easy to remember. and as i said before my parents seem to remember my niece's bthay which is in May but suddenly they have a blackout and forget 16 January. it did happened last year but i didn't expect it this year.

poor you ddubsgirl [hug]

did your parents forget too? :(

I thought it was just your sister.

maybe you should deliberately employ the text reminder techique, too.

"mum, don't forget DC's bday is 16th jan - are you comign over or will we just expect something in the the post?"

i wouldn't be that upset if it was just my sis but it's them who made me feel like crap.

I'm sorry.

C4ro, actually, even as a non-birthday rememberer I can see that's cr*p. Could you not have sent an email back saying, "thank you for all this, great. But I thought we weren't doing pressies this year as you didn't get DD anything?"

nickelbabysnatcher i think i should do that, send them 2 copies just in case one gets missing :)

Yes, I'm sorry too, Twin.

thanks everyone