... to think that most MNers live in a bubble?

[frgr]

Seriously, the amount of times I read on here about "oh we earn 70k a year but we're really struggle to provide for little Jacob's polo lessons this year" (or some other such shite).

In real life, the average income of my family and friends is probably circa the national average. I know for a fact that my BIL is on around £6/hr and works 42 hours a week, I know that my best friend's total family income is about 22k because she was talking about mortgages a month ago... I'm talking about hard working people who go out come rain or shine and do their day's work, to provide for their families.... and then I log on here and find out MNers are posting trivial shit about being unable to afford XYZ and feeling hard done by on their incomes of "only" 3x the national average.

I don't know if I've become more sensitive to this crap since starting re-posting on here last year (after a break of about 3 years), but it seems to me that certain members of MN are totally and utterly oblivious as to what the average family is having to endure during this recession.

It's fucking unbelievable, it really is.

In your opinion, why are so many MNers out of touch with reality? Does this site cater to a different class than me? Are avg MNers just generally deluded - do I even belong here any more, with our 21k combined income, worrying about where the next school trip fee is coming from despite the fact that both of us work?

Christ.

I mix with allsorts..lol..I have friends on MEGA money and some on minimum wage. I even have gasp friends on state benefits.

We go to each others houses for lunch/coffee and take our kids out together. It's never been a problem and there are no issues I am aware of. Luckily we are friends simply because we like each others company, not because of bank balances :)

RedHeels, you're right, to reflect my thoughts more articulately I should have written "insert luxury item beyond a lot of the average family's means, such as private education" instead of "XYZ" in my original post. You're quite right :)

Boffin Mum
"It irritates the hell out of me that people cannot take on board the complexity of family finances in this way."

Yes, me too. The op in that thread about trying to get a bursary for private school fees on £70,000 a year was given a flaming, richly deserved imho, and told she was BVVVVVVU.

So on the back of some mad first timer asking a very silly aibu, suddenly anyone who earns £70,000 or over is "living in a bubble".

I find that downright insulting.

To the person who asked what you have to do to earn that sort of money, my dh earns that plus some as a self employed television journalist. Its not rocket science, just an ordinary job.

Private school fees for one, let alone two children, are way outside our pockets. It exasperates me that some people on lower incomes seem to think that all people on £70,000 should be able to afford school fees as a matter of course.

"some mad first timer asking a very silly aibu, suddenly anyone who earns £70,000 or over is "living in a bubble""

Have you read the thread?

Read the post I made on Sun 16-Jan-11 14:03:33 to clarify.

And I'm not a "first timer" Ouch! I've been here 4 years (though with a break for a couple of years and this is not my original login).

p.s. you may remember me by the name of dugg/duggie/duggies, can't remember my original username....

The mad first timer is the woman who started the fees bursary/£70,000 a year thread.

Oh, very sorry in that case. I've been accused of being a troll/first timer before, recently, you see :)

£17,930 of seventy grand goes in income tax, apparently. Which still leaves a good wedge.

BibbityBoppityhat addressed something very valid -there seems to be a misconception that people earning high salaries must be doing something exceptional -it's just not strictly true.

I left school with a couple of highers but had certainly not done enough to get into University -I've worked lots of jobs but realised in my late teens/early twenties that if I wanted to make decent money then I needed to find a career that didn't need professional qualifications or a degree and went down the sales route -I've sold everything from Mortgages to IT to Medical Supplies and have since my mid-twenties been able to command a decent salary ( earning around £50k for last 5 years). DH earns more but he is in quite a niche business.

I suppose what I am trying to say is that it is possible to do it without qualifications or a good start in life.

I don't know anyone who sends their kids to private school or who would even consider it ...so to me thats a completely different world .I understand that some people live in that world though ,but if it wasn't for MN I would never come across them iyswim

Its hard for me too get my head round that lifestyle so I expect its hard for some of the more affluent to understand my poorer lifestyle, but thats what makes MN

I agree with Riven that Mn is great because you hear from all sorts. I don't mix in those circles either. The opportunity to get an insight into the lives of the type of people I wouldn't even bump into is brilliant. Some of them are seem to be in a bubble and lack any empathy for others not like them. But that's not confined to the richer posters. I've learned a lot since I joined.

£70,000 a year equates to about £3,700 take-home per month, if it helps people to understand what we are talking about. Our standing orders for the essentials alone come to £2,100, £800 of which is mortgage on our scruffy 3 bed terraced house. We are not rolling in it, but not complaining either. I am not living in a bloody bubble.

I have absolutely nothing whatsoever in common with a 20 year old Mumsnetter who spends her money on tattoos or hollywood waxing, but I fully respect her right to be here and don't think her life experiences are any less valid than mine!

There is a huge amount of snobbery on here where in general there seem to be three basic assumptions about anyone is well off: 1) they have no idea what it's like in the real world. i.e. anyone who is well off was born that way or maybe doesn't have any friends outside their same level of income 2) anyone who is well off cannot possibly relate to people with less income and 3) anyone who is well off doesn't have problems. It's a bit sad as I assumed that mumsnet was for everyone but there can be a bit of a bullying undertone to some posts (while perpetuating the myths above) if someone reveals their income to be more than the national average.

I think OP's first post was rather offensive in seeming to assume that anyone who has a healthy income doesn't live in the "real world" and I am glad that she came back and clarified what she meant.

Yes, because you have spent it.

bibbity - now you're going to get someone coming on and telling you a. how to budget better b. you have to, you really must, move somewhere cheaper, and c. you're an idiot for buying a house - how very dare you.

Nice try - but mn is mad at the moment. I blame it on the economic uncertainty.

You said it, novice.

Its like thin women aren't "real women" - a really stupid thing to say.

God I loathe competitive poor threads. Almost as much as I hate riches complaining about problems I can only dream of. But at least the latter are mildly amusing.

Horrible inverted snobbery OP

I would buy myself Fabergé eggs. Lots of them. I would stockpile them in the outhouse with the spare toilet roll.

Just a small point but I think you will find that us livingin our bubbles have experienced financial hardship at some point - I can remember Stepmonster stretching a chicken out over 4 days to feed the 4 of us - I complained that I wasn't eating fatty chicken soup again and she smacked me round the back of the head whilst yelling that was all we had.

Now I buy chicken breast joints from M&S because I can afford to and I hate bones and picking the chicken off the carcass.

I may not live in your world now you see but at some point maybe my world was worse than yours!

LeQueen speak for yourself. Our household income tripled over the past 3 years due to some rather jammy promotions but our outgoings have actually decreased on account of us being tight buggers