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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

...to think that if you have known for over 2 months...

29 replies

KalokiMallow · 15/01/2011 18:52

..that someone is going to be homeless and you work for a team that (supposedly) is there to help homeless people. That maybe, just maybe, you should have made some effort to at least try and help before they are on the street?

And should be thoroughly fucking ashamed that you were dragging your feet even though you also know that the people involved have severe mental health problems (including a recent suicide attempt).

Thank fuck there are people out there willing to go out of their way, even if they can little afford to help, when the cunts who are paid to be helping can't be fucking arsed.

OP posts:
Flisspaps · 15/01/2011 18:58

YANBU if they definitely haven't been trying to help, however YABU if they have but just haven't been able to find this person any alternative accomodation anywhere.

tuggy · 15/01/2011 19:00

AIBU by stealth so yes YABU

Toastiewoastie · 15/01/2011 19:02

Don't know enough about the situation to comment. What is the organization, and why is this person being made homeless?

Mumcentreplus · 15/01/2011 19:05

more detail please...but I understand your frustration

Original poster
KalokiMallow · 15/01/2011 19:12

By stealth??? Oh FFS.

Sorry, would you like my biography first?

Been forced out of our home due to our landlord turning up and threatening us. Have had to stay on my parents floor since early November. Have been asking the council for help since then. My parents cannot have us stay permanently, due to us staying on the floor and them needing to use their own home. Council have known since November that we could only stay till this weekend. Of course they've had to be chased constantly, and have even denied receiving paperwork that we placed into their hands - but waited for a month before bothering to tell us they've mislaid it.

They've given us forms to fill out, then told us after that actually, that wasn't the info they've needed.

Now we have to stay on the floor at a friends house, while she has to share a room and bed with her 2 sons (15 and 8), thank fuck they are lovely boys and are happy to help us.

It drives me mad that they've known for so damn long, and are still dragging their feet.

OP posts:
Mumcentreplus · 15/01/2011 19:16

So sorry to hear what's going on with you Kaloki have you tried involving the Coalition Against poverty?..they are very active and involved with challenging local government.

Toastiewoastie · 15/01/2011 19:17

I understand your frustration. DS and I were made homeless 5 years ago and the council really dragged their feet about it.

I think the problem just goes back to the chronic shortage of affordable housing, especially social housing.

Keep your chin up, things might seem impossible now, but one day you will be able to look back with relief. FWIW, you are definately NOT B U!!!

FabbyChic · 15/01/2011 19:21

The council will do nothing until you are homeless, then you don't get a flat you get a hostel or bed and breakfast.

Assume you are not employed because if you was you would be able to rent somewhere.

I too was going to be made homeless with two children, the council will do nothing until you are officially homeless that is the councils stance everywhere.

I though done all I could saving every penny I could from my benefits to find alternative accomodation.

It can be done, you have known for sometime you were going to be out of a home, at least you had a floor the alternative for me was having nowhere. I too have depression, bpd and anxiety issues.

The only place you can ok to is yourselves, no landlord can forceable throw you out, there are steps they have to go through.

Sorry but you are responsible for your housing first and foremost, no one else.

Having been there myself it is possible to resolve the issues yourself.

StrawberryTot · 15/01/2011 19:21

I have been in a similar situation and in all honesty i think yabu from my experience it wasn't up to the council to rehome me but it is up to myself they are there to help sign post and guide you, usually the council have the good tenants scheme running and the accredited landlord list where they will pay the bond, getting onto the local housing association waiting list but although i think they may get you in to a refuge or hostel.

Toastiewoastie · 15/01/2011 19:30

Sorry strawberrytot, but I think you are wrong. There are times when you cannot find a way out of the situation you are in. When I was made homeless nowhere would take me and DS (aged 2) in even though we had my dad as a guarrantor, because a) I was unemployed, b)we couldn't afford 2 bed rent, and when I looked at one bed studio flats the landlords claimed it 'wasn't suitable'.

Even now, working full time, I am no better off financially than when I was unemployed and there is no way I could pay a private rent.

HopeEternal · 15/01/2011 19:36

Kaloki, I think I remember your previous thread. How is your husband coping with this?

GypsyMoth · 15/01/2011 19:38

to be honest (and i've kind of followed your story),you arent technically being made homeless....yes,he was threatening....but thats a police matter.

you still have your tenancy?

he's not evicting you?

some people ARE priority. i think the best you can expect is a b and b somewhere,especially as there are no dc.

sorry Kaloki,just from what i know of your posts i've read,and what i know of homelessness (have been there)

Portofino · 15/01/2011 19:39

Have you tried to find a rental property? Why is your landlord threatening you?

HopeEternal · 15/01/2011 19:40

Iirc, Tiffany, the tenancy will have ended about now.

thefirstMrsDeVere · 15/01/2011 19:42

YANBU. The housing situation is beyond terrible though and I dont know what can be done. Even people I know who have the money to rent cant find a property and there is no social housing to speak of anymore.

I have a young person living with me who hardly knows me. SS knows they are here and they are very vunerable. They have done their best to ignore the situation for over 6 weeks. We could be doing anything to this child or getting them to do anything and SS dont give a toss. What makes it worse is that the young person is here because they have been let down so badly several times by different LAs.

Its shocking and as someone who works for the LA I know its all going to get much, much worse.

Childrens services safe? My fecking arse they are.

I really hope your awful situation is resolved soon. It must be dreadfully stressful for you and I dont blame you for being angry.

StrawberryTot · 15/01/2011 19:44

Toastiewoastie - what am i wrong about?? it is not the councils job to find you a house, its up to the person. i know some housing associations won't just take you on usually not without references, good tenant scheme certificate or even debts over certain amounts, like i said earlier i've had a similar experience. i understand completely that this is a disheartening and tiring experience but like others including myself have previously stated we are responsible for our own housing.

Flisspaps · 15/01/2011 19:59

In light of your second post Kaloki, YADNBU.

Original poster
KalokiMallow · 15/01/2011 20:00

The tenancy is over next week.

We cannot rent anywhere as nowhere is taking on HB tenants, and trust me, I've tried. If there is a council list of places wher they do take on HB tenants then the council wont tell us.

strawberry please do tell me what I can do, obviously i just haven't tried hard enough.

hopeeternal badly, as am I. Fast running out of energy to cope with this. Have barely slept for the past week.

OP posts:
TheMonster · 15/01/2011 20:00

YANBU, but having been in a similar situation, I am not surprised.

Toastiewoastie · 15/01/2011 20:03

Perhaps it is different when you are, but here you cannot get on the housing association list until you go through the council. And as there is such a waiting list, the council has to provide B&B then emergency housing until there is a place on social housing.

I have never heard of this good tenant scheme certificate, perhaps it is relatively new??? but it would have been useless for me anyway because I was made homeless when my ex H left us with nothing and I was unable to pay the rent. Being evicted for nonpayment of rent would not have qualified as a 'good tenant'.

I agree we are responsible for our own housing, but with the current situation of overpriced accomodation and the stigma against single parents on benefits, some help is absolutely necessary to prevent homelessness.

PocketMouse · 15/01/2011 20:05

YANBU Kaloki.

Tuggy... do fuck off Hmm

EricNorthmansMistress · 15/01/2011 20:28

Kaloki I think you live in my area in which case I work closely with that particular housing dept. I appreciate your frustration but the homeless prevention team is a misnomer as they don't actually have the funds/staff to do anything to prevent homelessness. It has to be a crisis before you will be helped. Staying with family means you are not homeless, sadly. Are they treating you as intentionally homeless then? I met with them myself and discissed the deposit guarantee scheme, if they accept that they have a duty to you then they must assist you, but in order for them to have a duty you would need to be in housing need and unintentionally homeless. I suspect they don't consider you either, currently.

I'm sorry you are having such a hard time, really I am. Housing problems are just awful. Have you considered looking outside of the town? We moved 10 miles out last autumn and have found letting agents to be 100% more understanding and decent.

EricNorthmansMistress · 15/01/2011 20:29

And if you are indeed in my area, try contacting the Bxxxx Housing Trust on london road. They may be able to advise.

onimolap · 15/01/2011 20:35

I' m sorry to sound harsh, but when I was doing some related work a couple of years ago, I found that the homelessness services are so overwhelmed with the numbers they are dealing with who already have no roof at all over their head, that there is simply nothing they can do for those who have somewhere (no matter how unsatisfactory).

I do hope something turns up for you soon.

StrawberryTot · 15/01/2011 20:41

KalokiMallow - what?!? i never at any point said you haven't tried hard enough, but if you say that then possibly this is something that you think yourself Hmm you asked are you being unreasonable and i answered im sorry that i did not bow to the answer you wanted for this i apologise, but what did you expect?? the council are not there to get you a house but will provide emergency accomadation when you are homeless.

Toastiewoastie - yes you're right, the good tenants scheme isn't used in all areas so not sure if it would have been available to the op been around a few years now though but still relatively new.