to think 6 children shouldn't have been left alone while parents went to (daytime) drinks party?

[secretskillrelationships]

Not sure whether IABU or not.

Just found out that ex spent a few hours at a drinks party leaving our DCs (13, 10, 6) with another friend. I assumed she looked after them but she went to the party too, leaving her 2 DCs. Then turned out another child stayed to play. So that meant 6 DCs aged 13 to 6. Someone checked on them every half hour or so 'and they had our mobile numbers.' The party was for grown-ups only.

I think it was probably ok too, as long as someone remained sober that they could return to the house super quick if a problem arose.

I'm not that old but I was going into town shopping with friends at 11 (strict itinary given to parents). I don't think it's a bad thing for 13years old to be given a bit of responsiblity. But perhaps it's worth asking whether your 13 year old felt uncomfortable. That might be the best judge of whether YABU. In the end I'm sure the kids had a better time than the grownups!

at not even being allowed alone in the house until 15!!!

i would have no problem at all,assuming they could get back in 5 minutes should someone sever an artery etc.

FWIW I think it's completely irresponsible not to leave a child alone until he's 15 - how does that prepare him for adult life???

Have never heard anything so ridiculous as not leaving a child alone until the age of 15. When I was growing up 15 year olds used to hold down full time jobs.

I suppose, for me, it would depend on how 'sensible' the children are normally and how far away the 'party house' was - also, whether they were told to go there if there was a problem or not to go there under any circumstances (as you seem to imply). So sorry, without knowing the kids - I'm fence sitting

I think actually I'd be ok with the OP's scenario so long as the adults weren't too far away/were contactable. I've left DS1 and 2 (10 and nearly 7 at the time) in the house alone for 10 minutes while I went to the shop.

BUT not leaving them alone until 15 (from the other poster) ! Did you let them out of the house alone before then?????

It sounds ok to me as an occasional occurrence, assuming that none of the children have special needs.

At 14 I would regularly babysit for an 8 year old, a 6 year old and a three year old. TBH, the checking on them every half hour is the only thing that strikes me as ridiculous in all this.

Oh, and the poster comparing this with the McCanns? How very stupid.

At 14 I babysat for 4 boys aged 3, 5, 7 and 9 every weekend and didn't even have a phone!

Comparing it the McCanns is riduculous, I think i would be ok with it, aslong as the adults aren't too far away and could get there quickly.

Sounds OK to me.

Where I live babysitting courses are run from 11 and up as this is seen as the normal age to babysit, so 13 seems totally fine to me. We leave our 11 and 10 year old on their own when going shopping (probably for up to three hours or so). However I don't let our children have friends over just in case tricky situations come up. I would expect a 13 year old to be able to cope with looking after a six year old.

why didn't they get a proper baby sitter. 13 is too young really to be responible for so many kids.

Oh, don;t be silly. If you've brought up 13 year olds who can't be trusted to look after their younger siblings for a couple of hours during the day, then in my opinion,then uou should look hard at your parenting.

One 6 year old to a 10yr old and a 13 year old and DH and the another adult a few minutes away. Wouldn't have a problem with that. No different to the children playing at the bottom of a large garden IMO.

Yes, fine during day for a couple of hours, given that the oldest two were 13. Kids of 14 can babysit. Am at poster not leaving kids til YOUNGEST was 15 - surely one must have been virtually an adult by then. I regularly was left babysitting my siblings when we wer 13, 12 and 6. And of course there were no mobile phones.... Why has it suddenly become irresponsible?

Like an earlier poster, I had a regular babysitting job at 14 where I looked after a 3 and a 4 year old. The father was a GP and I had detailed instructions about what to do if someone rang the house with chest pains.

Anyway, during the early 80s I lived in a street with quite a few children of a similar age. We'd be around 7 or 8 then and our parents would have parties in the summer and at christmas at their houses. The children would be left in one house, with the parents in another. Someone would check on us now and again, but we were pretty much left to our own devices. I have very fond memories of this time.

If you're not going to leave a child alone until aged 15, you might as well kneecap them for all the good you're going to do for their independance and wellbeing.

At 13 I was looking after my 8 and 3 year old siblings very regularly. A 13 year old SHOULD be competant.

perfectly ok. Ridiculous to suggest otherwise

I remember at 7 or 8 going out on my bike and staying out all day getting up to all sorts of mischief ..... part of growing up

I think it's ok. I leave dd1 and dd2 alone sometimes - they are rising 13 and 10. I wouldn't leave them in charge of dd3 though - she is 3, cannot be responsible for herself and I think it is too much. When she's 6 dd2 will be 12 and I may well leave them for short times even if dd1 isn't there - she will be 15 then. (Magic age obviously)

OP - are you completely off you head? What on earth could possibly be wrong with leaving 6 children, of whom the eldest is 13 and the youngest 6, in a house during the day time?

I wouldn't even have bothered to check up on them.

This could only be a problem if the children are very badly (abnormally) behaved.

"fatlazymummy Tue 21-Dec-10 00:12:16
Have never heard anything so ridiculous as not leaving a child alone until the age of 15. When I was growing up 15 year olds used to hold down full time jobs."

When and where was this?