to be a bit horrified that Boots are recommending CIO?

[JenniferCanesten]

As I am signed up to the Boots Parenting Club for the vouchers, periodically I get sent a magazine relevant to DS's age.

The other day I got the 5-9 months one in the post and flicking through it was a bit shocked to see this (on pg 12):

"from 6 months, you can leave your baby to cry for short periods. Try five minutes at first, then gradually extend the time so she'll learn to settle herself."

I find it very cross-making that they are presenting this as though this is an irrefutable part of parenting whereas obviously CIO/controlled crying is a pretty controversial method that many parents, myself included find cruel and unnecessary and possibly damaging.

They are GIVING ADVICE to people, which is a position of responsibility! I don't bother getting annoyed by many things but this has really pissed me off!

No, her job is to sell her product. It is easier for all these gurus to do that, if they can make parents feel miserably guilty.

Where does your link get its research?

It links to the original study - here:

www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/15144478

Links to more relevant research here:
mindhacks.com/2010/05/11/dont-throw-the-baby-out-with-the-cortisol/

which also directly addresses Leach's pseudoscience

Sorry, I'm not entirely sure what you're trying to say with that Pubmed study?

As far as I can tell it agrees that cortisol rises significantly on separation?

But we're not talking about separation anyway, we're talking about crying it out.

I was simply trying to answer your question.

Follow the "more relevant research" link above for more on how Leach is not basing her opinions on the available evidence, wrt crying it out.

Yes cortisol rises on separation - but why do you assume those rises are harmful?

I wasn't really on about cortisol. I was on about the emotional side of it and attachment related issues.

I don't know how scientific it is but I believe it. There is research, Bowlby and all, you know the ropes on that.

I'm just more inclined to believe things that I relate to strongly in my own feelings on parenting babies.

How often do we hear people saying 'I tried CIO and hated it, I felt so terrible'?

There's an alternative which carries none of the guilt, anxiety and stress of leaving kids to cry. Why bother doing anything else.

Some people are not as lucky as you, some (like me) have babies who have never slept for longer than an hour, and need endless pacing to get them to sleep. It is not usually a lifestyle choice. Long periods of extreme sleep deprivation put mental and physical health at risk.

"I'm just more inclined to believe things that I relate to strongly in my own feelings on parenting babies."

That is fine for your own parenting. It is not fine to pretend it is evidence based. Or to judge other parents' decisions based on your own.

Fair enough. But I'm not pretending. I'm just not able to provide the evidence I have read because it was in books, some time ago, which I do not have in my possession.

I don't know if it's even avaiable online or where to look for it.

I realise that makes my arguments sound stupid - but I don't think they are.

Well most "experts" ADVISE women to breastfeed. Doesn't mean every woman will.

Same goes for controlled crying.

Boots aren't going to come to your home at 4am to make sure you're leaving your baby for the allotted amount of time. It's advice, not gospel truth and law.

Doesn't "WHy love matters" by Sue Gerhardt cover this sort of thing?