in a right royal huff about cake recategorisation

[Slubberdegullion]

cor. I haven't done AIBU for an age, but I am I know I am (bu) and need some get some get a grips and bridge rebuilding tips.

For the last 3 years I have donated a decorated Christmas cake to the school Christmas fair raffle.

Last night I get an e-mail asking for its weight as THE PTA POWERS THAT BE have decided to put it into a 'guess the weight of the cake' comp and not in the raffle.

I know, OUTRAGEOUS isn't it? Man they have a nerve.

So I sent a few hoity e-mails.

Then I went to bed and had a lemsip and now have realised I am a giant precious-cake arse.

it was the high sift wot done it, kickass.

Yes, I'm quite disappointed that the photo of the high sift is no longer on Slubber's profile...

robbed i was, by a young 'un wot doesn't know rightly which kind of icing to use for a christmas cake.

MY cakes are still there for people to see, no hiding of the evidence from me.

Slubber - beeyootiful, beeyootifull cakes - I like the Big Purple One.

However, I am horrified, I tells ya, at fondant icing on a Christmas cake. Horrified

ooh, i know. shouldn't be allowed out in public, that cake shouldn't, not looking like that.

Do you know why I don't put royal icing on my cakes do you?

Do You?

It is because to get a properly smoothly iced cake with corners and everything (if you're doing a square) - none of this snow scene nonsense, is a 3 day eventer requiring the patience of a saint and several smoothing devices

AND

In the law of sugar craft land you really shouldn't put sugar paste things onto RI, so THEN you are left with have to do royal icing decorations.

FOR TWELVE LONG HARD WEEKS (evening class) I slogged away at royal iced beautiful things and you know what
a) they break into bastard tiny peices
b) they are mostly not that beautiful
c)they break some more

so

ner

[more folded arms]

Aitch yy I may indeed do a marzipan message from now on. But only nice ones.

I'll seek out the high sift photo for you SnowMuch

Will not impart cellophane info until apology is forthcoming

slubber, i would apologize, except that i spent a year doing RI evening classes (on top of a ft job & two-hour commute)AND yes, i have indeed had them break into bastard tiny pieces (though that shouldn't happen all the time, unless you're doing something wrong ).

I have, in fact, produced a 3-tier wedding cake, in a hexagon (more corners), with teeny tiny roses, piping, flowers, and ribbons, the whole she-bang.

so i feel justified in my judgement on this.

sadly, dh, dd & myself don't like fruit cake, so i don't get to do all that poncing about very often (did do a marvellous 3-d christmas tree on a cake for friends last year, complete with presents & baubles etc).

double folds arms, hoists boobs up to the ears, sniffs & does a catsbumface, all at once (which is nearly as hard as doing proper royal icing).

there's a reason why it's called sugar craft y'know, it's not just play-dough for adults, although that purple thing might fit the description.

Lol, my cakes are crap, so I think anyone who can produce works of art like the purple cake is a genius! Will look forward to seeing the high sift again!

oooooh get you with your 3 tier hexagonal cake mrs

whatever

The whole frou frou lace work and ribbons (did you do proper edible ribbons did you with the whole going in and outy effect huh?) and flowers is totally OUT anyway. Think antimacassars.

and

I've actually done 2 years of cake courses but only a term or maybe a term and half of RI because it is shit.

so I feel justified too

[justified]

Say you love the purple cake again and I'll tell you about cellophane (it's not that exciting btw)

Will you tell me about the cellophane, seeing as I love your purple cake?

I still want you to do a "guess the weight of the cake" thread btw.....

aw SnowMuch, I have just put the high sift back on the profile for you because you are LOVELY.

Shall I spurn Kickass some more and just PM you the secrets of the cellophane?

Awwww..... thank you Slubber! Yes do pm me (unless kickass apologises first! )

Norman sends his fondest, he is riding on a donkey bearing gifts of a kettle and a cup right now.

i. love. the. purple. cake.
there, happy now?

(actually i do love cake no. 2 btw)

lol

OK I'm feeling the purple cake love now

So the cellophane stall....

it's going to be an anticlimax.

The whole thing is just a big re-gifting exercise.
All the children get sent home with a roll of cellophane about 2 weeks before the Fair. into the cellophane you put (if you've already got it - No going out and buying anything new) some sort of gift that's been lurking at the back of your cupboard for an age.

So LOTS of bath/smelly sets, mugs, purses, weirdy perfume that would give you a rash, hilarious egg cups...you get my drift.

All the stuff comes back in, all nicely wrapped in the cellophane, some come with ribbons on the top, so it LOOKS like a present that you could just give straight away to some aged aunt, but as it's cellophane buyers can see what's inside.

Clever eh?

We flogged THE LOT on Saturday. 3 big trestle tables full of toot lovely things. We have regulars now who dive in and buy up £30+ worth of stuff.

We made um was it £200 or £300. So pretty good imo.

Ah, I see! Sounds like a good idea - perhaps I'll suggest it to our school. We always have a hamper raffle. Each class puts up a list of items for a hamper (e.g. Christmas pudding, dates, cracker, tea etc) and people can sign up for which item they will bring in. We then collect all the items and make up as many hampers as we can (they are large boxes, covered in festive wrap, filled with the items and covere with cellophane). We usually manage to make about 10 - 12 hampers. We then have a raffle for them at the school fair. They are very popular, and raise a lot of money. For some reason the school caretaker always wins one - but everyone likes him, so no-one minds....

We do hampers too, they have their own raffle and get done at the nativity plays.

Did I mention I won a CAMERA in the raffle proper this year. I really do love the PTA now.

I also apologised to the Chair for the snooty e-mails.

A CAMERA?????? You can use it to take photos of your cakes

i am just slightly surprised that guess the weight of the cake is a new thing. i know slubber lives in some kind of time warp 1950s world, but surely they've heard of guess the weight before?

anyway, so glad you told us about the cellophane - i have to go out now (to flog some cupcakes actually) and it would have been worrying me if i hadn't known.

big kisses to ya slub.

keep up the cake threads - they're my fave!

I do keep saying I live in Cranford

Hope the cupcake flogging goes well kickass. I luvs ya too

SnowMuch - yes, it's so fancy it as an instruction DVD and not a book. Have not attempted cake photography with it yet.

i am ridiculously pleased to see the high sift back. that was the first time that MN made tears of joy spring to mine eyes...

Aitch

true story, slub. it's an MN classic in its own right.

I loved that thread too. Winning the comp was the icing on the cake (at it were).