I am so angry!

[KateEllis]

At the end of September my DD (age 7) was cast as Cinderella in the school panto. The school takes these things VERY seriously so they have had lots of after school sessions etc. I was very pleased for my daughter because she was so excited (please note I did not care about her having a lead role, I just want her to be happy). She has had loads of lines to learn but has been brilliant and learnt them all, on top of learning two solo songs and 4 other songs and attended every after school rehersal. I had also made one of her costumes and bought another. The panto was due to be next friday, then the falling monday and tuesday.

However today this happened. I was waiting in the yard to collect her and her younger sister, when she came out of school I could see it looked like she was on the verge of tears, I asked her what was wrong and she said 'I'm not Cinderella anymore'.
At first my initial thought was, as she was ill yesterday mybe somebody covered for her and she was a bit confused. I asked this but she insisted the part had been given to another little girl.
Her teacher was in the yard so I went over to speak to her.
I just said dd is a bit upset because she thinks she is no longer playing cinderella.
Her teacher said "That's right she isn't"
I asked why and she said
"Well she was off yesterday, and I expect people who are given big parts to show a commitment. It is also to show her that good attendance is a must"
Yesterday was the first day my daughter has had off this year!!!!!!
She also said she has given another girl the part and now this little girl has to learn everything by next friday which just seems impossible for a 7 yo, and as I said the school will expect this girl to learn all the lines as they take drama productions extremely seriously.

My daughter is so upset and I am so angry, up until today her teacher and others have been coming up to me in the yard and saying how great she is doing now they have completely devastated her after all the effort she has put in. She now has no part at all, as its a whole school production all parts are taken up.

I am so angry and upset for my poor daughter who hasn't stopped crying

btw, I had a couple of days off when I was a child and was sacked from being "The Witch" in some sort of school play thing.
I came back from my absence and just froze.
Teacher went mad and auditioned all the other girls in front of me until it was awarded to Nicola Statham. She were very witch-like. I looked on. Mortified.

But I was crap.

And my mum hadn't made a dress.

And we hadn't been rehearsing after-school. Just in PE I think.

It was the 70s.

Things were different then.

This is dreadful, no sickness policy but a "good attendance" policy? What a crap set up.

Just look that teacher in the eye and ask for an explanation, and then just wait...and wait. Let 'em squirm. That will be only a fraction of the misery they have caused your DD thus far.

what horrible people, no compassion.

Possibly the head has to back up her staff even if she thinks this is unfair. But spineless nonetheless.

I've just read the whole thread and am agog at the appalling treatment of the OP's little girl. That is dreadful. I really hope that the meeting went well.

Hi everyone sorry for late post meeting lasted a very long time.

Head and teacher were at meeting , which I was pleased about as wanted to talk with teacher.
They were so arrogant and unprofessional, didn't shake hands, sat down only 3 chairs didn't offer to get another, I was so angry but trying to seem emotionless.
I simply started by asking the teacher if she had any reasonable justification for doing this, she rambled the same crap about attendance reward/ punishment. I told her that it was despicable that any 7 yo should be punished for attendance let alone my daughter who had only 1 day off due to a sickness bug, I also got a print out from the public health intranet at work explaining about 24-48 hr sickness policies and how it was terrible that the school didn't have one, and that I would be informing governors and director of public health in our area who I know personally.

This seemed to knock some of the confidence from them!
I asked why cinders 2 if anyone was to replace my dd wasn't the understudy this was followed by shifty glances! Then they mumbled something about the girl having good reading skills!
I asked if cinders 2 parents had donated a large sum to the school recently - they were so flustered!
But denied this as a reason for choosing.

I said I wanted said that the only outcome I would be happy with is my DD playing cinders.
They said this would not be possible, I asked why, they harped on about upsetting cinders 2, I got a bit angry at his and said that this wasn't a- my problem, b- my daughters but the schools problem as they created this ridiculous situation.
They continued not to budge until my husband mentioned that we would be taking this to the local newspaper and maybe even further as what the school was doing was completely unjust, unsafe (no sickness policy, and cruel.

They did not like this!
Both left the office to discuss privately!
Came back and said my dd could do fridays performance cinders 2 could do monday and tuesday. I said no, it is all or nothing.
They finally agreed she could have her part back. I also told them that my children will not be coming back to the school after Christmas.

I completely agree with what people have said and do not want my children at such a cruel school, where there might now also be bad feeling towards them.

I am pleased that my daughter will have her part back and she seems very happy.
But still upset that this has happened at all.

Thanks for everyone's support, you have all been really great.
I

Ooh yes, put it in the paper!

Or (reluctantly) maybe not, in case it embarrasses Cinders1. Would make a good story though, I bet. School Scrooges Ruin Cinders's Christmas . Pap shot of head looking evil (or just squinting awkwardly into the wind) outside horrid posh school.

Oh sorry, xpost :) So glad she got the part back, haven't read whole post yet but that is fab ( will read properly now)

Well done Mr and Mrs KE!!!

You SHALL go to the local-and-well-respected-state primary after all, Cinderella...

And they all lived happily ever after...

Standing ovation from me.

Wish I could have been a fly on the wall

Best of luck to your dd for her show.

well done! And good call moving schools!!!! hope you find a much nicer happier place for your kids.

Well done you ! Would have loved to have been a fly on the wall!! and I bet they are gutted at the school fees they will be losing !

Good job Kate Ellis - you should be really proud of yourself, and your daughter will remember for the rest of her life that you & her Dad are on her side.

Well done

Just read it all. You absolutely rocked it, you STAR. They sound absolutely hellish. I am really amazed.

YAY!!! awesome news. Well done you and DH!

And now begins the hunt for a new, much more caring school.

well done!

Round of appluase KateEllis, you were brilliant!!

Appalling teacher, appalling headteacher.

I really wish you'd recorded the meeting though.

well done that woman!

utterly and totally the right outcome, and i am very glad you are taking them out.

Well done on standing your ground - hope the performances go really well.

Well done! I'm sorry you've had such a horrid time.

Fantastic news and extremely well done x

That is horrible

Well Done, I'm kind of curious to know the school as rarely have I heard of such unprofessional behaviour.

I hop you sit in the front row and take lots of photos :)

Top work! I hope you are planning to let the governors know why you will be withdrawing your children.

I'm just looking at my dd's little face and imagining if not one but TWO horrors like these people colluded to treat her this way when she had done NOTHING wrong.

I would actually want them killed. Unreasonable? Hell yes!

The more I think about this and imagine the scene of your meeting, the more impressed I am that you and your dh held back from actual physical violence.

!! Applause !!

..you done did good Mr and Mrs Ellis!!

What a pair of fucking bastards - eh?