When I ask they are very evasive mil even adopts a "none of your business" type of an attitude! THe thing is there is serious danger that my children could get duplicate presents if they dont discuss it with us. Infact at ds2s recent birthday it nearly happened. I took my mum to a toy shop and suggested various thomas toys (among other suggestions but he is Thomas mad). She bought a thomas play set "cranky the crane". Pil came round in the afternoon and ds got a very similar cranky the crane set! Also on the same trip I showed my mum a lego plane set and said ds1 has mentioned he wants that for christmas. Mil mentioned at the birthday get together (ds1 wasnt in room) that when she babysat last ds2 mentioned he wants the lego plane for christmas. I mentioned that I had mentioned it to my mum as an idea. However she refuses to confirm or deny if she is buying it. This sort of thing happens every christmas and birthday for my dc! So worried as its no secret what they like/want that they will get duplicates iyswim.