to not be scared of giving birth but be freaked out...

[OnlyWantsOne]

...by the 6 weeks that follow?

I remember sitting on the loo when DD was about 5 weeks old, she was screaming to be fed, i hurt all over, feeling disgusting and hating my ruined body oozing everywhere with sore bits and being pretty fed up TBH.

So, im 39 weeks, and I have started to dread the next bit... people keep phoning me (WHY do they think that it's ok to do this??) and asking if Ive had the baby yet... and Im dreading going for a wee and it making me cry.

Or that first poo.

Oh... heck

God I'd already forgotten about all of that and dd isn't even 10 months old. The first poo... shudder... Hmm maybe will push yearning for second to back burner.

However I think next time I'll be much less uptight about "getting things done", feeling like I have to keep on top of things during the first few weeks. And it will definitely be less of a shock. The knowledge that the fucking terrifying bit passes quickly will help me through.

You'll be fine! It's the blink of an eye.

mmm... christmas dinner at my in laws, combined with over excited 4 year old, small baby maybe 3 weeks old, still bleeding, breast feeding establishing oh fuck kill me now

In my experience it was definitely easier second time round. I've heard labour is quicker usually (was for me). Also you say your DD was 6 13 and I've heard anecdotally that small ones are harder to squeeze out, take longer, and are more traumatic (that's anecdotally, 9lbs 6 DS was definitely harder than 7 15 DD so there is clearly a size limit for optimum comfort ).

I've heard the 3rd labour is slower and gets harder again- anyone know if this is true?

Take Difflucan for your first poo. Its breastfeeding friendly. Softens it. Just slides out a treat

Ooh a poo after a c-section is no picnic. Not sure about the natural birth (apparently according to my mum it feels like your insides are going to fall out) but the c-sec all those muscles just feel wrong. You think farts just do themselves - they dont !

Only fools etc...

Definitely easier second time around I found. My first was OP and long and painful, four and a half hour 2nd stage - but - dd2 was 26 minutes of actual pain, including a four (yes 4!) minute 2nd stage.

Recovery easier too, sat on a pillow for weeks after dd1, was up and doing the school run (walking) within 72 hours of dd2's birth!

Warm baths with a few drops of lavender oil and/or tea tree oil in, keep a jug in the bathroom and pour warm water over your bits as you wee (I find this helps with the mess too! - sorry tmi). Fold a sanitary towel up and press against your perinium for the first poo, helps stop the 'Oh god, everything is going to fall out' feeling.

HTH

You'll be fine

You can take lactulose whilst pregnant - why not prepare yourself from a few days before?

Also peppermint water which they gave us in the hospital with our painkillers helped with the horrible trapped wind.

I had a caesarian though, so don't know about the actual ravaged bits bit.

isnt diflucan for thrush??

It was definately never as bad as the first birth in terms of recovery. Although I will confess that the afterpains with dc2 were horrific and made me cry/scream but the the next 2 were nowhere near as bad so I think there actually was a problem after dc2. They kept telling me there wasn't but I felt awful and didn't with the other 3!

Ooh,

1st poo, I can tell you I had a harder time trying to do this after dc1 than 2! And 1 was an emcs - thought I was going to split open tbh (kept having to jump in the bath and back on the loo - though god knows why i thought that would help!!!)

With 2, had done it in the hospital without even thinking about it.

Howeve what I have found hard is the sleep deprivation and fitting in around dd (3) - getting her to nursery etc etc, and so much having to be done that I never seem to catch up! (not to put you off or anything...........) Still wouldn't send ds back! (Also I find we are a much freer household without routine!)

I think it gets easier, to be honest first poo ok i will give you that one. But because its not such a shock how you feel after, like it was with your first, I think it doesnt seem that bad.

My third is 5 months now, remember it doesn't last long x

Good luck with the impending birth

Feck Diffulcan is for thrush and certainly not breastfeeding friendly

What do I mean.

DULCOEASE!!!

Sorry

You guys are scaring me.

I think I'm going to have elective caesareans if I ever conceive (PCOS) !

A1980 the 1st baby was easy ;)

Tattydvine - Im laughing mockingly at you my love xx

stop panicing woman and breathe¬!

second time around is so much easier. plan ahead.

1. lots of juice, water, prunes, lactulose so poo is soft.

1. jug of water at the ready for pouring over as you wee.

YANBU but seriously with 2 kids you dont have time to worry about it all, you just dont.

Make sure you drink LOTS more than you think you need to and the poo thing will be fine! It was much less traumatic second time round for me.

Also, I have found this time round much, much easier. Dd is 8 weeks and its been a piece of piss compared to last time. Last time I barely left the sofa house until ds was 3 months, an expedition to Tesco was a major life event, this time I was doign the nursery run and shopping less than 3 days post partum and at the zoo for a day out about 3 weeks later, oh and visited family for a few days 4 weeks later, all things I couldnt have imagined last time.

You will be fine. I will say though, get help for the first couple of weeks and try not to do too much, I did and I had problems with bleeding, alot. Dont try and be superwoman, I was so sick of being pregnant that when dd came I was elated and went a bit mad going out every day doing 'stuff' and it probably delayed my 'receovery' a bit.

Oh and I had afterpains with ds (dc1) and not with dd :)

oh bloody joy.

get some good drugs in. co-codamol, diclofenac, gin.

Tattydevine "You think farts just do themselves - they dont ! "

When my DSis had her c-section in Australia quite a few years ago, she was not allowed anything to eat until she had farted. Having been without food for some time, she described herself as "very excited" when she finally managed to let rip. Mind you, from memory my sister was always quite excited every time she farted even in normal circumstances . . .

I got a bit grazed and had stitches the first time and I could have done with G&A for toilet trips.

Second time round though I didn't have any damage at all and it was much better, no toilet trauma. I shudder to think what that says about my fanjo.

right, ladies -

write my DP a shopping list

cocodamol?
what else

dried fruit.

lemon barley water.

gin

diamonds

chocolate

nice aromatherapy oils

nice shampoo and conditioner

nice soft pyjamas/loungy leggins & Tshirt tpe

YANBU, DD2 is 8 weeks old now and it has been horrific again!! Still, at least I know that things will calm down eventually. GOOD LUCK!