In wondering what's wrong with reins?

[beebuzzer]

Who uses them?
Who doesn't?

I do and I often get patted on the back for it by passing old ladies who "don't understand why they ever went out of fashion"
My mum used them on all of us. If I didn't use one my little one would be all over the shop and I am guessing holding my hand for any period of time would be quite uncomfortable for her. (she is only small)

Otcha, You don't like prams,bottles or other modern contraptions and yet you happily use the computer and internet?!

Hope you get on with them ok Nikki. :) They can take a bit of getting used to but like you said safety is more important. :)

Nikki, just get the reins and do what you know to be the best thing for your son. If he ended up under a car , you'd be judged for 'letting' it happen so just do what you need to, it won't be for ever and you will crack it with a bit more time.

I've taught my DD the word no from the start

Sadly as she doesn't listen to me all the time I have used reins in the past and still have a gate on her bedroom door to keep her in there at night.

YANBU nowt wrong with reins.

I'd rather see a child walking on reins/wrist strap than being carried, or pushed in a pushchair. It is a way to keep them safe and teach them about walking safely by the road at the same time.

Even the most compliant children who always hold onto the pushchair might be tempted away by a kitten/ball/sparkly thing they see in the road. I watch school children walking into school and if they drop something (usually a rolling water bottle) they will go into the road to fetch it! If they do this, then a smaller child will certainly follow toys, etc they drop/see.

Children need to learn, with, or without reins, that roads are dangerous places.

I used buggies, as I suffer from back ache, and couldn't carry my kids once they got above a certain size. My DDs were late walkers and bottom shufflers, so we'd have been house bound without it. (I don't have crowds of reletives to carry them for me, unfortunately.)

I used reins (or a wrist strap) as I had a bolter. Also a child who would do what you didn't want him to the minute your back was turned.

Kids are very different, use whatever works with the one you have now.

I has this argument with DH. He thinks they're restraining, treat the child like a dog etc. I think they're a great safety measure and don't want DS squashed by a car.

We live on a busy road, loads of driveways so there no way in hell DS is walking on our road without reins until he is 16

Also a friend of us lost a nephew at toddler age who got hit by a car reversing out of a drive. Obviously it wasnt the mum's fault - the driver hit the wrong pedal - but that sort of thing haunts me. DS is learning to run and yes while he knows what no means, he doesn't listen.

I let him wander freely in the park. And rarely in shops but never on a busy street.

So what if people equate reins with dog leads. Noone bats an eyelid when people treat animals better than kids!

All the Judgers can jog on.

'He thinks they're restraining' So he doesn't strap your DS into the buggy or into his carseat then, Iggly?

I never used them, always held my DCs hands.

I admit to be one of the horrible people who see reins as a sort of dog lead but if it is any consolation I do not care if other people use it (I do not judge) I just cannot picture myself holding my child in a distance IYSWIM.

I only get 'aah look how cute', when ds is wearing reins. He's got a furry monkey one.

Never even crossed my mind that people would judge.
He understands no, doesn't stop him thinking he is hilarious when he runs away from me.

I use reins or a wrist strap because DD is a bolter and finds hiding hilarious. I would rather be judged by people who don't understand what it is like to have a bolter than lose her in an accident or for her to be snatched. I'm old enough to remember Jamie Bulger, and yes, I am probably being paranoid, but I couldn't live with myself if I hadn't taken all steps I thought necessary to prevent such a thing happening.

I tried reins with my DD1 -she was delighted and used it as an opportunity to play "Horsie" guess who had to gallop along after her ?

Meant to add that as she was a "walker" and hated being in the pushchair after that she was only allowed to walk if she held onto the pushchair ,on the inside away from the road or back in she went.
She was about 2 at the time.

I don't use reins with my son (2.6)...we're really lucky as he stays close, doesn't go near roads and actually likes holding my hand. I'd be prepared to use them with my next child if they liked wandering though!

Reins didn't work with mine they just lifted up their legs and tried to dangle from them. Handholding had to suffice.

What is actually wrong with reins though? It just seems to be a snobbery thing, whereas at least with other "controversial" things (like dummies for example) there is more of a weighing of risks and benefits.

Can anybody actually state (and back up with a credible reference) how using reins is potentially harmful or bad for a child's development?

Don't people just do whats right for them, their child and situation? Whats to judge?

I am a baby wearing, cloth nappy babies, breast feeding, bottle feeding, occassional rein use on kids, baby led weaning, jar feeding when convenient mum.

I take what I want from the parenting spectrum and use it to fit my life/choice/family.

On the other note, I know mothers who's children have died being hit by cars, do what you want to keep them safe.

I think it is just a snobbery thing, but I don't get why snobs think they look common?
Are they the ones who dress their tiny weeny dogs up in little winter tartan jackets so the dog feels more humanised?

My brother is a paramedic and after his tales of toddlers vs. cars I'll take the woofs and the judging, thanks.

DS is 16mo and will not hold my hand atm. We teach him off the reins in parks and quiet cul-de-sacs whenever we can, but until I'm confident that he has more sense, reins it is.

Can't believe I even feel the need to justify it, tbh.

My ds still wears reins, he's 6, severely asd though, with no speech and no sense of danger. I couldn't give a fuck if someone wants to judge, I'm more bothered that my son is safe. Although he's getting a bit too small for them now, god knows what I'm going to do then.

I mean he's getting too big for them

Bremusa - fledglings.org.uk sell larger reins.

Thanks Fanjo, I'll have a look

I have just bought some for ds who is 3. Never felt the need for them before but now I am pregnant and finding getting around a lot harder and am scared he bolts somewhere dangerous. Not tried them yet but can imagine they will be handy when the new baby comes too.

3 of mine used reins and when prole commented that treating them like a dog always said better that then dead.If you use from word go they get used to walking on them .When bit older used wrist strap in busy areas more so that not seperated by crowds