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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to hate truely clean tidy houses!

199 replies

lisad123isgoingcrazy · 19/11/2010 22:27

My "friend" teased me today about my house always being cluttered Angry I have 2 young children and a dog and my house is neither dirty or untidy, just lived it!
I have toys, paperwork and books around the house.

Her house is always spotless and everything has its place.

Drives me mad

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 20/11/2010 19:19

imarriedafrog Grin

this is part of the reason my house is so messy "hmmm, kitchen needs a tidy..... i'll just make some cookies first tho"

BeenBeta · 20/11/2010 19:30

rosieposey - "...how does everyone else keep their paintwork clean i'd like to know."

Kitchen spray and a gentle rub with a sponge. Also tell DCs not to touch walls, food and drink only allowed in kitchen OR supervised in dining room. Wash hands and sticky faces after leaving table.

clam · 20/11/2010 19:31

Yes, beenbeta. Popcorn in the sitting room. That's what hoovers are for.

thisisyesterday · 20/11/2010 19:41

omg people clean their paintwork?

hmm

sooo... cookies anyone?

misdee · 20/11/2010 19:41

i clean my paintwork. because i have 2 big dogs with muddy paws lol.

thisisyesterday · 20/11/2010 19:42

my house sadly is not big enough to limit children to certain rooms.

if only i was rich!

i only have a kitchen, sitting room and hallway downstairs.
oh, and a toilet.

i suppose i could make all 3 of them sit in the hallway all day.... i don't think they'd like it mch tho

pagwatch · 20/11/2010 19:42

Yabu
Clean and tidy does not always equal anal and souless.
Clean and tidy I'd fine as long as host/ess is welcoming and warm and you feel relaxed.
If you feel uncomfortable simply because it is tidy then you may be just making assumptions.
Mine is mostly clean but definitely lived in and I hope my welcome and attitude make guests feel they can chill. But I judge hosts by their welcome not by how clean their skirting is.
I hope those who judge tidy houses are totally relaxed about other judge types who dislike mess.
The more time I spend on mn the weirder people seem......

rosieposey · 20/11/2010 20:43

I have two dogs ( little chorkies though) and two cats so i find they dont make that much mess its fingermarks on the white paint that i hate. Clutter is ok (as long as its hidden) and the children generally eat in the kitchen or when we arent being lazy eat in the dining room.

Pag think you made a very good point in that you dont judge your host on how clean their skirting is but on the welcome you get. I always go out of my way to make people feel welcome and anyway my house is 'lived in' enough to not make anyone feel uncomfortable.

My PIL are awful. To the extent that we dont go over there anymore as if DS puts his little hands on anything she screeches at him and says she will have to polish that Hmm but thats another story.

Wiping paintwork only seems to work so far for us - we would be doing it all the time. And i do wipe DS's hands when he is done eating but you know people and their hands - they arent always perfect and white paint shows everything! Ah well - i love our house Grin

stropicana · 20/11/2010 20:49

YANBU. I thought I wanted it until I had it (for house sale) and it made me really uncomfortable. Grin having said that i would like to live in less mess. Confused Bear

Sidge · 20/11/2010 21:00

I feel quite defensive when people imply that because my house is clean and tidy I must be a dull, shallow person with no other interests apart from cleaning, and that my home must be soulless and unwelcoming.

Quite the opposite - my friends seem to find it a relaxing place to be and I certainly don't care if they drop crumbs or their children make a mess. It's a home after all.I just like it cleaned up and tidied away once the children are in bed so I can relax. Having a clean and organised house makes me feel comfortable.

I would never dream of telling a friend that I find her house messy and unhygienic, it would be rude and unnecessary; after all I don't have to live there. So I'd rather they didn't think negatively of me for preferring to live the opposite way.

MerryMarigold · 20/11/2010 21:03

YADNBU. Me too. I feel uncomfortable taking my kids in spotless houses, worry about what they'll do/ mess up/ feel obliged to tidy up.

(But I have 3 kids, we live in a cluttered, messy house and we just got a kitten)!

SkyBluePearl · 20/11/2010 21:19

I love tidy houses but also like to see books, projects and photos out. Wish my house was less messy too

lady007pink · 20/11/2010 21:23

You should never look below eye level, then your place won't look untidy!

toomuchmonthatendofthemoney · 20/11/2010 22:00

beenbeta, to me the clue is in the name "living" room - a room to live in, have fun in, be a family together in. Not ban from.

you are lucky to have your extra space i suppose. but to me, my home is ds' home and he has the right to be wherever he wants. He knows there are a few of mummy's special things he should take good care with (vase, ornament) and he's 4.5 now and has never damaged anything really valuable or sentimental.

Spotless homes make me a little uncomfortable, incredibly messy or grubby homes do too. I am in the middle (clean, tidy at times, a bit of clutter - toys, books in certain places) and will probably always be that way.

Life is too short to worry too much about this i think.

trixymalixy · 20/11/2010 22:04

Is there such a thing? IME even the mist immaculate houses have a " Monica" cupboard.

I wish I had a clean and tidy house.

LeQueen · 20/11/2010 23:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LeQueen · 20/11/2010 23:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Asteria · 20/11/2010 23:19

I yearn for a tidy house - the clean bit is not a problem - but the tidy bit evades me. I am a bit of a hoarder though. I do find it very depressing when it gets too cluttered.
My ex told me that I was "the sort of girl who needed staff" - if only....
Many moons ago I had a housekeeper and a gardener and it was heavenly and my home was immaculate!

NoelEdmondshair · 21/11/2010 04:45

Has BeenBeta told us what his kids use their "workroom" for yet?

BeenBeta · 21/11/2010 08:29

Our DSs 'work room' is where they do homework, read, play piano and have their computers which they work and play PC games on.

We work at home so its really important to us to have a clean, calm, tidy home. I agree with others that it would be really depressing and stressful if it was untidy and dirty.

goingroundthebend4 · 21/11/2010 08:40

i would love to have a seperate sitting room that no kids allowed or no clutter one that i can go in dust and hoover once a week and is always spotless something I always have dreamed of

But with 4dc and no money its not going to happen I do try and i declutter regulary but im never going to have a show house .But do feel better when have given it good clean then i blink an dits upside down oh well

littleducks · 21/11/2010 08:48

I'd be miserable if I lived in Beenbeta's house (actually scrap that with her rules, the house sounds great with all those rooms and ensuites). But i think its a 'horses for courses' thing, and the most important bit is that everyone who lives there agrees on the standard of cleaning/tidying

BeenBeta · 21/11/2010 09:06

littleducks - by the way. I am a man and I do all the cleaning. Shock

NotAnotherBrick · 21/11/2010 09:11

My house is spotless because I only allow DH in certain rooms. He is not as good at tidying and cleaning as me, and often leaves things lying around. I don't really give a shit that it's his house as much as mine and the childrens - he's annoying and I can't be arsed clearing up after him so he's only allowed in the loo and his half of my bedroom.

littleducks · 21/11/2010 10:47

Sorry thought you were a mum on another thread, must have been a different 'Beta' Blush