to be most aggrieved that I did not get married off in the last IPOAT thread? Won't someone think of Nigel?

[BeribbonedGibbon]

Well, am I?

She'll certainly do you frills and frou-frou.

Staggers in looking unkempt. Deary me, I almost picked up a nasty virus whilst hunting for mantillas. I narrowly escaped, but I shall have to give them up. Will soeone get the hipbath out?

'Someone' that is..

MammyHully, I see your daughter out by the paddock where the stallions are being broken in, lordy, what is she wearing?

PrincessHullyTiamee

Lawks a mercy! I done tole her an tole her that that there parasol is too fancy for us slaves!

Her hair is mighty lustrous. All that pig fat you make her rub on day and night shore seems to have paid off.

I think I am over the mantillas now. Twas just a phase, there'll be another along in a moment. Rummages around portmanto for lacy pantaloons. Pass the pig fat.

or portmanteaux perhaps. something like a trunk anyway.

Don't mention trunks!

Why, how lovely!

la la la can't hear, fingers in ears. lalalala.

I had him already Hully darling

He said you were a bit rubbish. All those pies, apparently.

Yeah well... he said your feet being larger than his manhood made him feel rather odd

Riven, my little plate of grits, we aallll share in Johnny, 'tis the rules...

Now, where is mah beootiful new sash? mah tiny waist needs a scarlet band to acchenchuate its proportions, ooh, MammyHully! Can't you do better than that? By the way, I did hear PrincessHullyTiamee was heard singin' by the corn field...an' a gentleman admired her vocals, Ah believe his name is Captain Simon Cowell, an upstart, I dare say...

Ah just know tonight Ah shall find my prince...and be swept away to a house even bigger and better than ma Pa's...

Is Ashley Wilkes coming? I hear he is so sweet on me it aint true? what was that you said Melanie ? Fie on you with your timid ways and mousy brown hair...No man admires a wallflower, whatever your romance novels tell you!

[impressed] Mimi, I could just hear you and your southern drawl...alas I must swoon for now

Narrative, ladies, narrative? Umami-Mae, I do SO admire your new frock, but surely it looks a tad like your Mama's curtains in the small parlour? Why, what a wonder your Mammy is with a needle! Puce does so become you!

Well bless me. There is a soiré at nightfall for the Ladies who form The Committee for the Keeping Of The Glorious Trunk and I have nothing to wear except my shimmy.
I must retire for the evening until my maid has found a suitable gown.
My , my stays are tight. I feel a little McKeith....

(swoons)

Aaaah do declare, you girls may keep young Johnny to yourselves. I am already so occupied with other fine young gentleman that I can scarce draw breath!

Oh Miss Mighty Mississippi Louisiana Belle, there ain't no-one so sweet on you as y'are on yourself! Shame on you for being so prideful! We all know your Pa made all his money dealing with the carpetbaggers! Come away Melly, don't let her be influencing you. You look just fine in your <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=cache4.asset-cache.net/xc/3170629.jpg%3Fv%3D1%26c%3DIWSAsset%26k%3D2%26d%3D45B0EB3381F7834D90AC8C6CD89C43E1F5D9C41E90017D798D143FD4AE7FC81B&imgrefurl=www.gettyimages.com/detail/3170629/Hulton-Archive&usg=__T-tCHzdLPT7gdqd9KM8qroLYt_U=&h=594&w=468&sz=76&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=gud9K5XXCVRiTM:&tbnh=159&tbnw=119&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dcotton%2Bgone%2Bwith%2Bthe%2Bwind%26um%3D1%26hl%3Den%26biw%3D1280%26bih%3D609%26tbs%3Disch:1&um=1&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=444&vpy=60&dur=2240&hovh=253&hovw=199&tx=35&ty=267&ei=PzXsTLXZMOiAhAf7gPnMDA&oei=PzXsTLXZMOiAhAf7gPnMDA&esq=1&page=1&ndsp=19&ved=1t:429,r:2,s:0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">simple dress