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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that dd's PE kit was at school YET she did PE in her underwear..?

146 replies

Shhhh · 04/11/2010 12:12

Surley its not unreasonable to expect that if a PE kit is provided and at school that come the PE lesson it should be worn..? AND that a group of 5/6 yr old boys and girls are not running about in their knickers..?

OP posts:
Hedgeblunder · 04/11/2010 15:20

Shhh- I wouldn't like it tbh, I don't really understand the reaction you're getting but hey ho.
I think it's definitly the right thing to have a polite chat to her teacher- there must be something in place for children with different faiths/beliefs?
I was a TA a while back an helped lo's get changed for PE- there was a few Muslim girls who would have happily run arous in their pants but their mothers wanted them to be more covered, so I made sure they were dressed appropriately.
I hope you get it sorted

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 04/11/2010 15:24

Did they want their boys to be more covered as well?

FranSanDisco · 04/11/2010 15:27

Hedgeblunder, you sound like the midday assistants who tell dd and her friends to put pe shorts under their skirts if they want to do cart wheels. I told dd to ignore these silly ladies and show her pants with pride Wink.

LostInWhales · 04/11/2010 16:19

Being covered for religious reasons is completely different to being covered for any other reason.

How did it go with the teacher?

(tis DanceInTheDark still in a frock from another thread)

Original poster
Shhhh · 04/11/2010 16:19

FSD, cheryl cole does it to be sexual... also "show her pants with pride" Hmm you are joking aren't you..? bit ott iyam.

To those that are interested, I spoke to dd's teacher. Apparently they were given a choice to change into underwear or not... They also didn't have time to get changed, do PE then change back... hence the options. As I thought tbh.

dd choose to go into underwear... why/how..because her friend did. Typical behaviour of a 5 yr old. Hence not giving them a choice.

So I have told dd if she doesn't like doing PE in that way then stay in her uniform.

OP posts:
Maisiethemorningsidecat · 04/11/2010 16:27

Does your 5 year old know what it means to be sexual in that context? I'm guessing probably not, so it's a safe analogy and hardly OTT.

Glad you got an explanation, and now your DD knows to stay in her uniform. It sounds as if the teacher did the best thing - if she hadn't given them the choice there could just as easily been complaints from parents who didn't want their child to be too hot in their uniform or who thought their children should be given a choice.

redflag · 04/11/2010 16:42

Vest and knickers was good enough in my day.

Spend £27 on ds's kit so i would be annoyed that he didnt wear it too.

FranSanDisco · 04/11/2010 16:51

No I am not joking. Why is it not OK to cartwheel and show your pants if you are 7 yo? So you agree my 7 yo should wear pe shorts under her skirt in case her pants are seen. Jeez, I think the Hmm belongs in your direction.

kat2504 · 04/11/2010 17:43

I'm very surprised to read this. I'm a teacher although I don't teach kids that young. But if I did, there is NO WAY that I would ever put myself in the situation of having a room full of kids running round in their knickers. Yes, they are only 5 and innocent. There isn't anything wrong with them being in their pants really. But for the teacher, all it takes is one big fuss over nothing and they could be accused of all sorts in the tabloids and probably lose their job.

I'm not sure I agree with this happening though. I was made to do it aged about 7 or 8 for not having kit and I was horrified at the time. They have a pe kit so it should be worn.

arfasleep · 04/11/2010 17:55

I remember being about 7/8 and always wanting to wear shorts under my skirt so that I could go on climbing frames/muck about without boys teasing 'I can see your pants!' although that was because we had to wear skirts to school, might not be the case now. If in mixed school there is an issue. Think posters who think there's no probs in boys/girls doing PE in underwear are very naive or have not spent any time in school lately (so not really in position to be so Hmm at OP), there will be teasing. Different if it was pre-school or nursey environment but at 5/6 years and over boys/girls def start to notice differences.

MadamDeathstare · 04/11/2010 18:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thisisyesterday · 04/11/2010 18:29

why was she so upset if she chose to wear underwear? i don't get it

i wouldn't care at all, in fact i was cross the other day when ds1 forgot his PE kit and wasn't allowed to do it in pants and vest! meant he missed out

mummyofexcitedprincesses · 04/11/2010 18:52

Even after hearing the teacher's response, I think this is a time-management issue and would want to see it addressed in some way. I have taught in several schools and the last child I saw doing PE in their undies was me in 1983. It just isn't done anymore.

lborolass · 04/11/2010 18:55

Originally I was going to post to say that I thought children had to have a change of clothes for PE so I can understand them not being allowed to do it in thier uniform and if they have a choice to do it just in underwear and for whatever reason your DD choose that then you are making a bit of a big deal about it.

But then I saw that you said this "Yes, ok I will say it. This world is full sadly of people who prey on lo's. There is no denying it. " Do you honestly believe that this is true ? I try not to be judgemental but this is just a ridiculous view to hold and I hope your DD isn't picking up on this as you will take anyway any innocence from her childhood.

And I'd be interested to know how you managed to spend £30 on a 5 year old's PE kit

Maisiethemorningsidecat · 04/11/2010 18:55

It is in the schools that DS and DS went/go to - and not only that, the girls and boys and in the early years of primary get changed together in the same classroom. How they've manage to emerge unscathed and unscarred by the whole experience I'll never know...Hmm

Firawla · 04/11/2010 19:00

Posie: Fir....why would you be upset? Are teachers or boys going to abuse the girls?

no i just don't think it is very nice, it seems to lack respect for the children to expect them to do pe half naked if we would not be happy to do that ourselves - i doubt many adults would wish to prance around in public in a pair of knickers so why subject it on the children? its not about them being abused or not, it just lacks dignity and imo it teaches them more self respect if they know they should be wearing clothes and not being made to go infront of people undressed, against their will
the op dd was upset by it so clear she did feel humiliated/embarrased or something like that, so clearly unkind for the school to subject her to that

Firawla · 04/11/2010 19:04

maisiemorningsidecat - as a muslim mum i can tell u yes would have a problem with the boys doing pe in their underwear too, not a gender issue just an overall not comfy with it for any of the children
would b v suprised if ne1 other muslim mums i kno would b happy with boys running round in pants either, its really not an issue of girl or boy if its to the extent of just wearing pants thats a no no for everyone as far as we r concerned, generally

redflag · 04/11/2010 19:24

Ok £27 included

Black jumper (school logo)
White t-shirt(logo)
Shorts (you get the drift)
Pe bag
Black jogging bottoms
Pe socks
And trainers.
Thats how, its all mandatory too and must have logo on too.

PosieComeHereMyPreciousParker · 04/11/2010 19:28

Firawla Thu 04-Nov-10 19:04:06
maisiemorningsidecat - as a muslim mum i can tell u yes would have a problem with the boys doing pe in their underwear too, not a gender issue just an overall not comfy with it for any of the children
would b v suprised if ne1 other muslim mums i kno would b happy with boys running round in pants either, its really not an issue of girl or boy if its to the extent of just wearing pants thats a no no for everyone as far as we r concerned, generally

What has being a Muslim got to do with it? Please tell me you don't cover your dds heads.

Christ alive why is everyone so obsessed with sex? And if it's not a sex thing what the fuck is it?

PosieComeHereMyPreciousParker · 04/11/2010 19:29

FWIW when I was a child your pants and vest ws your PE kit.

onceamai · 04/11/2010 19:37

Agree with Posie,etc., we always did it in pants and vest in the infants - barefoot too. Didn't do me any harm; or the rest of the class - oh, but I think I might have grown up gloriously politically incorrect Grin.

Do you disapprove of schools approving of marriage or serious long term relationships too?

samcrow · 04/11/2010 19:37

redflag - if that's for primary school I'd be complaining to the governors, that's far to much to ask parents to pay if it is.

littleducks · 04/11/2010 19:39

I would not be happy with it

I know my dd wouldnt choose to do pe in her pants though she would probably started crying if she was asked to not after.

She has leggings and a t shirt for pe (not uniform so cheap) and wears that, she chooses to change in the wendy house for privacy which the teacher is fine with

I must admit to asking about this on the school tour then and what the policy was if kit was forgotten etc. as i clearly remember the uncomfortableness of walking down the corridor to the hall (which was cold back then) in pants and vest when i was in infant school

littleducks · 04/11/2010 19:40

We did pe barefoot when i was in infants also until a girl accidentally stepped on a drawing pin that had been dropped by a teacher putting a display up on the wall, so i am pro-plimsolls

mummyofexcitedprincesses · 04/11/2010 19:44

I keep spare kit in my cupboard, stuff my children have outgrown or donations from parents. One little girl never has her own but I wouldn't dream of putting her through the indignity of doing PE in her (tatty, sometimes dirty) underwear. Children don't like to be obviously different from their peers and develop a sense of modesty at a young age, right or wrong.

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