To think I should be able to be a SAHM when dh earns 65k

[wishiwas21again]

How much do other sahm's partner's earn?

Op, what did you mean?

I got the impression that perhaps the OP's husband did not want her to stop work.

Oi - OP!!

hehe, FM, that's what I wanted to say...

Fair does if you can afford it. My OH never earnred enough for me to be a sahm....but I didn't want to be one. Where we live £65k is a HUGE amount.......we earn less than that between us..{hbiscuit}

................

Like Trinity I was a SAHM for 2 years and OH was on roughly 15k.

I now work 2 days a week...but we recently worked out that we would have exactly the same amount of money 'coming in' from additional WTC if I chose to pack in the job. Bit depressing really.

Standing on the world...

being nosey - what does your dh do to earn 120k

We are on something like 42 combined and there is no way I couldn't work, although on less with previous partner I did SAH but then again we didnt have a horrendously huge mortgage then. Nowadays I don't really buy anything for me, all for house/pressies or food..grrr

I'm really shocked by the person who thinks 60,ooo is a lower wage.My husband earns about this,and believe me works longer than 9 to 5;as i imagine a lot of dads do nowadays regardless of their wage.He supports 5 of us though;although we do go on holiday every year,we can't afford all inclusive holidays abroad,and have never taken children abroad.Would love too,but we would have to be a lot more careful about our spending.

Troll off

ande,don't understand!

He's on more than 120k - madness really...he's board level in a well known company he works probably 70 - 80 hours a week, sometimes more and holidays are always shared with work. He loves his job....money is not the main motivator but life would be pretty mental if I worked too. We feel the dcs should at least see one of their parents through the week- they miss him though, as do I.

sounds like you are not being very kind.

sorry meant ande didn't sound very kind.

I didn't mean to suggest that 60k was a low salary but if that was dh's salary we would not choose to live in the south east - we couldn't afford the mortgage on our very average looking house!

I'm sorry,standing on the world alone;my husband works 50 to 60,and that can be hard.i don't have any family to help,so don't work,as 3 kids who get sick a lot,and no one to look after them but me.I think I've just been unlucky to have children that seem to pick up everything going,and daughter recently had time off to have appendix out.Middle daughter always had ear infections,after swimming,that laid her low.I don't know how people manage who don't have relatives to help.My husband thinks i should just stay at home, but in this day and age it is psychologically so hard.

Oh,we live in west wales,so i understand their would be a difference.

sorry,there would be a difference.

Sorry. Shouldn't have posted. Not up to it.

SOTWA - I live in SE (Surrey/Sussex borders) and DH is on a 1/4 of yours! I'm a stay at home with 3 DDs and we have a 4 bed house (mortgaged too not HA or council) but I shop in charity shops and buy reduced food, we don't go on holiday and we have 1 10 y/o car. It really does depend how you want to live and what you will do with out but to some people we are rolling in it and I feel grateful that I am able to stay at home.

Oh should say DH works way more than 9-5 usually 8.30-6/7 plus weekend work.

Some people can survive on £15kpa. Some people need £45kpa.

Ridiculous amount of variables.. where in the country you live is the biggest (SE isn't quite as expensive as London, but not far off. A 3 bed house in Perth will be significantly cheaper than one in Cobham)

What are you used to? If you have a £2k a month mortgage, it's going to be OK - just. If you have a £450 a month mortgage then stop fucking whinging. If you have bought something at the height of the market, are paying far to much for it, then even on £65k you should be OK

btw - £65k is approx our combined income. On that we paud £1250 mortgage, £650 debts (inc car loans) and £600 a month bills.

horrible.

I did suggest my dh was deluded when he thought a salary reduction would reduce his working hours. No need to get so defensive truthsweet we all make choices - I'm not critisizing yours, just describing mine. We have no family closely, we only live in London for dh's work and as I said if he earned a lot less we'd move to improve our finances rather than struggling to pay the mortgage.

oh, and we live 2.5 hours from DP's work as the cost of housing is so much cheaper here.

grr.

and we live in a 2.5 bed terrace.

and we only have one car

and we only go on holiday in the UK, once a year

and we're putting off having another child.

grr