to wonder about these older children still in strollers...

[chaya5738]

OK, so I know I am totally setting myself up to be flamed for being judgmental but...

I am wondering what the deal is with all these almost adult-sized children in strollers. I see them everywhere. During my lunch break just now I went into a toy store and there was this boy who looked to be about seven - no physical or mental disabilites that impaired his ability to wander at an ok speed around the store - browsing with his mum. When it was time to leave the store she calls him over and he gets into a stroller and off they go. It was bizarre. And then a few days ago on the train a similar thing. A mother gets on with her daughter who looks about seven or eight. She then gets herself out of the stroller, jumps all over the seats, has a grand old time and then when the train stops at the next station she gets back in the stroller and off they go. And then I saw this over the weekend again as we walked along the river. This child who was almost as tall as me happily sitting back in a stroller while she was pushed along by her parents.

I don't remember being in a stroller at all when I was small so I must have stopped being in one quite young. I remember going on shopping outings with my mum and getting quite tired, and probably complaining a bit, but we'd just stopped for a cup of tea or my mother would walk a bit slower. I soon built up shopping stamina that sees me in good stead today.

Admittedly my DD is only 15 months old so I don't really have a good grounding for saying when children should stop being in strollers but I seem to be seeing quite old children with no physical disabilities being pushed around because, presumably, it is faster for their parents to do shopping that way. Is this true MNetters? And what does this say about the health and fitness of our children...

I reserve the right to come back and retract this post in three years time when DD is five and I can't get any shopping done without strapping her into a stroller.

You can't tell what disabilities a child has from the outside. My friend has an autistic son who looks physically perfect. At 7 (and as late as 10 for that matter) however he was doubly incontinent, non-verbal, and prone to running away, smashing things in shops and sudden epileptic fits. Unless you spent time studying his face and demeanour (which few people do to random strangers' children), you would never guess that his mum had to keep him in a pushchair so that she could get around Sainsbury's without having to call the police to catch him as he legged it down the road.

Also you cannot tell how old a child is from their size. My 13 mo for instance looks 6 months, but she walks and chatters. My friend's just 2 yo looks like a 4 yo. There is less than 18 months between my friend's DD and mine, but they look 3.5 years apart in age. A child that looks 5 might well actually only be 3.

That's true Duchesse, my two wear the same size clothes but there are over four years between them.[hconfused]

Oh no confused face with a little hat!

There is no [hconfused]! It's a travesty! Every other smiley is there with its little hat but that one. What kind of appalling discrimination against the confused is this?

There's no biscuit with a little hat either. :(

The hat would get stuck in your teeth [hgrin].

"...some parents are lazy and are doing it for an easy life!"

How can it be called "lazy" to push a great big lummox of a child back and forth places?

"The buggy means you can still have your own agenda to some extent - as soon as they're out you have no choice but to fully involve your child with whatever you're doing. But that way they child gets so much more out of it."

Since when does every footfall of every school run or shopping trip have to be a rewarding/stimulating/educational experience for the child -- since when is it my duty to ensure that? Why is so wrong that I just want to get there and back in peace (and within a reasonable time frame, too)? [Stressed-out Teeth-Gritted Smiley].

We bought spacehoppers for our reception classes to help strengthen their legs and improve co-ordination.

I have huge boys. They were enormous babies 10lbs 8oz, 11lbs 6oz and 10lbs 15oz and are now 13, 9 and 16months.

When my now 13 yr old was 2/3 yrs old, and tbh was still in a pushchair if I needed to go to town for an extended period of time, I would get people looking at me as if to say (what is she doing with a 6yr old in a pushchair?!). He is now 13 and M&S aged 16 trousers are too short for him for school.

Just because you have small or average sized children, does not mean that we all do. In addition, you don't know how far these people with their children in a buggy have walked; a four year old might need a buggy for a rest if on a 5 mile round trip into town.

Why does it bother you? Are you perhaps concerned that your own children don't get enough exercise and therefore have your filters set to pick up what other families are doing?

Totally agree Ragged. Woe betide life should be 'easy' for a busy mother.

Kingthistle, don't despair... my dc (who really loved their buggy) are pretty active and sporty... actually they never get tired

I haven't read the whole thread so apologies if you've all moved on hugely from the initial post BUT: my 7 yr old has ME and it's really not something you can see from the outside. If I have no alternative but to take him to the supermarket (wipes him out for days) then he has to sit in the trolley as he can't walk round without ending up in pain and having to be carried to the car.
He has had some horrific comments whilst being pushed around the store; I now refuse to shop at all in Tescos as every single time we went in to a particularly store we were followed around by a woman who tries to make me take him out "due to health & safety."

Long post but what I mean is: there are invisible disabilities and most children (at least the ones I know) don't sit still if they can run around instead.

ragged I have already been flamed for that, AND backtracked several times AND promised not to be so judgey in the future.

Any chance I can stop being quoted now? I am not the only one to have expressed this opinion on this thread, I am one of the few who has backtracked and agreed that what I wrote sounded bad and yet I'm the one being flamed.

I only posted in the first place to say how much I'd learnt about hidden disabilities. The 'agenda' comment was just to explain what annoys me about SOME parents who have this attitude ALL the time, I NEVER said anything about every experience having to be wondrous etc.

Please read all of someone's posts before you rush to flame them.

Franca that's good news, maybe there's hope for him yet!

Sorry KingThistle, you did backtrack, I apologise for seeming to flame you. That's why I didn't quote with your name, I meant to reply to the points you'd made not really to you personally... points which are still widely believed firmly by many no matter how nicely you yourself conceded.

Fair enough

This thread is one of the reasons why I'm glad DS2 has a paediatric wheelchair these days.

My DD is 3 but looks at least 5, if not older. She is not overweight, just very tall. Her speech and mannerisms are also very developed which mean she can easily be mistaken for older too. You can never tell a child's age just by looking.
I also agree that those without cars have to rely on their buggies far more often and for far longer than those without. I am a fairly recent driver so can well remember what it was like to have to walk everywhere, often miles and use unreliable public transport with tired irritable children.

Are you very short?

Do you not have much of a life of your own to think about?

Our youngest was in a stroller right up until he started school. Sometimes he walked with me, sometimes he was in it. The reason being I walk miles and miles a day. It wouldn't be fair to ask him to walk that far and it would take too long.

People have always been judgey about the time we leave our children in strollers. Interestingly they are always the judgey fat arses who drive everywhere, only expecting their child to walk from parked car to venue of child activity. As a family we walk for miles to try and keep healthy and rarely use a car in town.

They're either BIG younger kids or prob more likely older kids with learning difficulties - which btw aren't always obvious. My cousins both had those big buggies til 7 or 8, both serious learning difficulties, both could get away with it not being really obvious at that age unless you talked to them. They used to get very tired in case you're wondering and it was easier out with them with buggies

I have always found this Mudandmayhem. The judgey-judgey pants people round here tended to be those who drove to school, drove to the local shops, drove to the nearest parking spaces to the shops in town. I don't drive, and walk for miles some days. Since my ds came out of the buggy about 6 months ago (he is 4.5), I have had to scale down the amount of walking we do together, as it's just not really feasible. We do sometimes walk home from the swimming pool which is about 2 miles away, which he can manage now, with a fair amount of whining!