to wonder about these older children still in strollers...

[chaya5738]

OK, so I know I am totally setting myself up to be flamed for being judgmental but...

I am wondering what the deal is with all these almost adult-sized children in strollers. I see them everywhere. During my lunch break just now I went into a toy store and there was this boy who looked to be about seven - no physical or mental disabilites that impaired his ability to wander at an ok speed around the store - browsing with his mum. When it was time to leave the store she calls him over and he gets into a stroller and off they go. It was bizarre. And then a few days ago on the train a similar thing. A mother gets on with her daughter who looks about seven or eight. She then gets herself out of the stroller, jumps all over the seats, has a grand old time and then when the train stops at the next station she gets back in the stroller and off they go. And then I saw this over the weekend again as we walked along the river. This child who was almost as tall as me happily sitting back in a stroller while she was pushed along by her parents.

I don't remember being in a stroller at all when I was small so I must have stopped being in one quite young. I remember going on shopping outings with my mum and getting quite tired, and probably complaining a bit, but we'd just stopped for a cup of tea or my mother would walk a bit slower. I soon built up shopping stamina that sees me in good stead today.

Admittedly my DD is only 15 months old so I don't really have a good grounding for saying when children should stop being in strollers but I seem to be seeing quite old children with no physical disabilities being pushed around because, presumably, it is faster for their parents to do shopping that way. Is this true MNetters? And what does this say about the health and fitness of our children...

I reserve the right to come back and retract this post in three years time when DD is five and I can't get any shopping done without strapping her into a stroller.

"But to be fair, some parents are lazy and are doing it for an easy life! The buggy means you can still have your own agenda to some extent - as soon as they're out you have no choice but to fully involve your child with whatever you're doing. But that way they child gets so much more out of it."

I posted earlier on, saying that I did use a buggy for mine, occasionally, until they were 4, because indeed I'm a "lazy" parent, and I much preferred to have a happy child on buggy than a tired one, tantruming in Sainsbury's.

But lol, lol, lol at me (or any other parent) daring to have my own agenda and not involving my child in activities he/she couldn't care less about

And again, at least we didn't use a car to create more pollution.

I have used a major buggy for both my nt looking dcs. People stared. They don't stare at ds in his wheelchair tho.

thederkinsdame - yes it would be fabulous to have people just keep out if they have nothing helpfull to add. Mind you, I have also had some lovely acts of random kindness from strangers, when other people have been causeing us problems, so there are people out there who do care and do want to make our lives easier.

My DD stopped using a buggy when she was 2.......MONTHS old.

Do I win?

Haven't read the thread, but just wanted to mention that I saw a (approx.) 5 year old girl today in the front section of a P&T being wheeled along with a baby bottle in her mouth! I didn't look for long enough to see what was in the bottle, but it was a normal baby bottle with a teat and everything - I was gobsmacked!

I first looked because the smaller child in the back section was having a bit of a tantrum and the mum bent down and tried to calm him down by placing her hand over his mouth I don't have a toddler myself, but I was a bit shocked that she thought that would calm anyone down...

Judge, judge, judge I did

We are just back from holiday and took the pushchair so we could go out in the evenings. DS is 4.5 and hasn't used it since our last holiday, but very useful when he got tired and fidgety. Alternatives to this include a) having dinner at 6pm but sadly restaurant not open at that time b) eating very very quickly so as to be out before DS got tired c) leaving DS with an unknown babysitter costing us ££ and potential worries about the person or d) never going out and eating in every evening. Compared to those attractive options I'm not sure why using a buggy would be considered a problem.

I've put my 6 yr old DD in a pushchair when she'd had an operation and wasn't supposed to do too much walking. That was probably a week of disapproving stares.

PartialToACupofMilo, the bottle might have belonged to the younger child.

Wow KingThistle what a sanctimonious post.

My kids can walk to school or the park and back. And when we're going somewhere on their time, that's fine--at some point the 2yo will insist on being carried and the 4yo pulled on her scooter. So if we have to walk to the shops, they go in the buggy, because they can't walk a mile to the shops, around the shops, and a mile back. It's nothing to do with being focused on your child and a perfect parent and all to do with getting your errands done and getting home in one piece.

Yet another here with a giant pre-schooler. He is 3 (nearly 4!) and 1.12m tall with size 12 feet. He looks about 6. Sometimes he goes in the buggy when he's tired and since having been on MN, I do sometimes wonder if there's someone out there secretly judging me at these points. And look, there probably is.

Bigmouth that isn't a bad assumption if you has asked me that in the June before DS started school I would have said september but not thought you were being judgemental as DS was still 3 at the time!!

YAB completely U

Here is another unfortunate parent of a child with a disability which may not be immediately apparent, and I am well aware of the dirty looks I receive from judgemental people on a daily basis when DD is in her pushchair.

You may have noticed OP that there are quite a few of us on here and you are extremely lucky that you will never know how it feels a) to have a child with physical problems and b) to be stared at on top of all the stress and worry that this brings.

Think before you judge....

Oh I know I know I was just in the middle of trying to explain it better! I read it back and it did sound preachy .

That is just my opinion of how things should be. Real life gets in the way, of course it does and not every trip out can be a wondrous experience! That's not the reason some people put their kids in buggies though, and that's still true.

I'm far from bloody perfect and I've already admitted to being judgey AND promised not to do it again!

I don't judge when I see 'older' children or older looking children in pushchairs I just assume theres a reason.

Altho someone I knows DC was in hers until 4.3 but would kick, hit and punch anyone who went near or touched the pushchair and that I didn't agree with - especially when the older DC weren't allowed to hold on in case the younger one got upset. This child still goes in a trolly at 5.6 as she won't walk around a supermarket - fine but she'll still kick off or kick when someone goes near her but play the 'I'm left out' card when older children are talking and she's not included.

I admit to bribing DS with choc buttons to sit in his from 3 as quicker to get back from the shops with heavy bags - until I bought him a scooter [hgrin]

Why exactly would anyone judge a parent who use a stroller for a NT older toddler?

1. Having your own agenda and not being focused enough on your child (still lolling at this one)?

2. Lazy parenting (fair enough ) (still, if we have a stroller it means that we are walking... so less lazy than driving a car)

3. Still "babying" your child?

What is the inexcusable sin committed by stroller users???

yes you are being unreasonable

You can stop lolling now! I've already said I know how that sounded!

Maybe I secretly want my agenda back

Pengwin - maybe it's just me but I think the younger child having a baby's bottle is just as bad... he looked around 2-3 and to be fair the older girl was the one merrily drinking out of it. Thinking about it, maybe that's why the younger child was having a tantrum...

I can be very judgey - I know this and accept it as a fault

I've just read your latest post Kingthistle, I'll stop...

My children, for instance, weren't really interested in cruising the aisles of Sainsbo, so the best thing for us was to pop child in the buggy, give the child a book and a snack and get the shopping done in total harmony

Would you wonder about my son if you saw him aged five in a buggy? Even though I don't have a car and we live two miles from town??

I know many have said about their dc's disabilities and using a buggy is essential sometimes. But there are still people who use them for no reason at all, one being in ds's class.

And the people judging always have CARS.

Do you poll the people you judge and ask them if they have a car. On a four mile round trip in and out of town my son will hop in and out of the buggy and walk at least one mile of it. In the back of a car he'd be walking not one step, but yet, people who sail past me in a car no doubt judge!

I cant drive, but our school is literally 2 mins walk away. if i had to do 4 miles with ds i don't know what i would do really, as he would never get in a buggy, think he would just have to lump it.

Franca I'm going to get bitten on the arse by this anyway as DS is already at 14 months showing signs of being the laziest boy who ever lived - I don't think he'll be wanting to walk anywhere!

I know i would take his bike