to be bored with myself and to want to become a Jilly Cooper character for the winter?

[BalloonSlayer]

I want to sit in front of a fire of apple logs, wearing only a Dark Blue towel.

I want a rosy-cheeked face which I have to tone down with green foundation, instead of looking like a corpse unless I put on loads of blusher.

I want to drink three quarters of a bottle of Moet before doing ANYTHING. (Including: getting up in the morning or taking an important exam.)

I want an Absolutely Filthy Mini instead of a people carrier.

I want DH to do thumb exercises so that the ball of his thumb becomes pudgy because apparently that's sexy or something .

I want to lose loads and loads of weight every time I am a bit sad about something, so that everyone who thought I was a minger before is suddenly struck by my beauty, instead of eating cakes to cheer myself up and getting fatter.

AIBU?

Shoot shag or marry: Luke Lyssander or Patrick o h

Marry Luke, shag Patrick (and his old man), make Lysander curried parsnip purée and pheasant casserole and read him some poetry before tucking him in.

Marry Lysander, Shag Luke, Shoot Patrick (with water pistol...wet shirt?)

Marry Patrick and not the old man too, shag lysander repeatedly and have polo lessons in palm beach with Luke. Perdita would kill me.

Wet shirt. Like it.

My favouritest EVER thread

Marry Luke, shag Lysander, shoot Patrick

Lady could it be your mother's middle name followed by a double barreling of your current road name and previous?!

Lady could it be your mother's middle name followed by a double barreling of your current street name and previous?!

Goodness I just realised not only how genius my formula is but I might sound like I am trying to extract personal details which I promise I'm not. No need to share but mine's a corker!

Yep I want to be Taggy! ;)

I'm a bit more Lizzie Jones

I want to be Daisy.

She's shagged Rupe, Drew and Ricky, not to mention Luke, Red, Bas and the twins sniffing round

In reality I would be a ghastly lefty bore but in my wildest fantasies I'm actually perdita

Or Caitlin ... Green hair dm's and acerbic wit with wisdom beyond my years

Drew makes me feel a bit sick though, so less of a draw. I always wanted to be Caitlin O'Hara when I was her age. Now I'd love to be Taggie. Sadly I thinkI am closest to Maud; sexually incontinent, red hair and a massive lush. No Declan though, damnit.

I want to drink 4 fingers of something

I want to smoke cigarettes while my cat sits on my shoulder, eyes screwed up against the smoke

I want my rings to be so loose on my fingers they threaten to fall off, but look doe eyed and amazing

I am re-reading "Wicked" and am torn between wanting Paris Alvaston for my teenaged self as a BF or whether to (foster) mother him and give him love and security. He is an utterly enchanting character.

at LeQ's attempts at writing in Jolly Super's voice, bless her.

Incidentally DS aged six thinks that the novel in my bedroom is entitled, "Wicked Jilly Cooper" and keeps asking me what it's about and why she is evil.

Mary Wellington-Green

Hmmmm does sound rather Jilly doesn't it?

Don't know if any other low-brow degenerates read this surreptitiously in the eighties but Christina's mother had dark hair like a cloud too.

Aconleigh I keep reading your post as "and a massive bush" but I don't think I would if this were not a Jilly thread.

I think in the 80s the popularity of "big hair" meant many women had a cloud of it.

Brilliant 80s hair photos!

Agree with others who've said Riders, Rivals and Polo are the best. TMWMHJ was OK but they really went downhill after that. I cant even bring myself to finish Jump because the cliches and characters you don't care about get too much after the first few pages.

One of the things I like best about R/R/P and also the girls name books and the earlier ones like The Common Years, is the descriptions of where they're set - the way she writes about the Cotswolds and London is so evocotive and accurate. This is one of the things that makes JC books so much more than chick lit IMO.

She also describes the 70s and 80s really well - maybe this is why the later books are crap not as good, they don't fit into the 90s and beyond very well. It does make me laugh how she tries to make them 'of the minute' by mentioning brand names throughout - everyone gets baskets from the Body Shop and t-shirts from Miss Selfridge in TMWMHJ!

I have always wished a man would call me 'angel' but if DH did I would probably laugh and although I'd like to be Taggie I think I'm more like Daisy - arty, always a few lb overweight, lush like a drink (have never worn velvet knickerbockers though or taken part in an orgy!) or Maud - sits around gossiping and drinking instead of doing anything useful (but I'm not playing second idle to a glamorous writer husband unfortunately).

Off to sit in front of a fire of apple logs, drink whiskey out of a teacup and wish I was the horsy type, it seems to be key to having a JC life :)

Did no-one else wear velvet knickerbockers as an 80s child? Mine were navy and came from 'the catalogue'. I may have had a matching waistcoat.

Thank you, colour!

Mine's Mary Cannock-Mortimer (or Mary Mortimer-Cannock; which sounds better?)