to keep longing to home educate my DC's

[ValentinCrimble]

I find school tough...there's always something I am unhappy with or suspicious of...I KNOW the kids are fine...it's a good school...I know that they will get through it all and have an education/friends and all that...but I keep thinking that they would have all that anyway and without my having to support the 6 year old with reams of homework every night and crap reading scheme books.

Is it still thought of as odd or weird to home ed? I sense a bit of a change in people's opinions recently...DC is in a private prep...money is not an issue as we are lucky enough to have a bursary...don't know how I would deal with state as our local one is notoriously bad (I am talking rife with bullies and under special measures) and the others are rammed to the gills with locals on waiting lists.

I'm not unhappy with the school as such but feel that its an awful lot to trust strangers with my DC's education...come on...give me your best for and againsts of home ed?

You could find a private school with less homework, OP. I wouldn't put up with that from a private school.

I'm convinced that HE is a valid choice and fantastic for many, but my reservations include:

All the HErs I know have blind spots; topics they don't see the importance of. Some argue that there is no value learning something you don't want to learn. I disagree.

All the HErs I know (and this includes some dear friends and family, so I hate to say it) -- are Snobs. They exude an arrogance about it, and very much against conventional education techniques... which strikes me again as an enormous blind spot. They are all zealots at heart, and I guess I can't understand feeling like they do.

Most the HE'd people I know were very advanced academically compared to peers until about age 14... but as adults they are marked underachievers compared to what you would expect given their social background. Eg., 2 parents with post-grad degrees, but their HE children don't even get a first degree at Uni. I think this goes with the children being under-institutionalised and also being told their whole lives how the hallmarks of an conventional education system are crap and worthless (especially exams, certificates, grades, qualifications, etc.).

Most the HE kids/people I know complain (with genuine sadness) about lack of friends and social life when they were growing up. Some are scarily shy and talk about how hard it was to overcome that.

It's obviously a huge sacrifice and responsibility; way too much for me!

piscesmoon as I mentioned on my post, my oldest is the only one at school...ofen says that it would b better to have me do the teaching at home.

Local groups are a huge issue for me though...as in there aren't any. Funny to think though that there could be more people like me locally but nobody makes the first move

bidibidi

But one of the people on here has just said their child has only just begun Uni and is doing very well socially.

How may Home educated people do you know? Sounds like a lot....I don't think using the words snobs and Zealots makes you sound that open minded tbh though...tarring people with one brush.

Also what evidence is there about the "marked underachieving" once they get over 14?

Be the one to make the first move then-someone has to start!
However if you are not keen on helping with what the school asks are you sure that you want to be led by what your DC wants to do? Another thing to bear in mind is the long term-are you doing it to 18yrs or just to secondary? My SIL started when the eldest was 5 yrs-and loved it for years, but her youngest is now 15 yrs-doesn't want to go to school and she has been fed up with it for at least the last 5 yrs but has to continue.She is bored and wants freedom to do something different for herself.

NotAnotherBrick - what I mean is that some people have issues themselves with schools, which may not have any connection with how their children are doing, or what the school is like - parents sometimes project their own bad experiences of school onto their children, even though the children are thriving. If a parent has genuine issues about their child's school, or how their child will suit schools in general that's a more valid reason.

Valentin mentions that she is unhappy and suspicious, even though she "knows" it's a good school - I think it's important for her to "unpack" that and work out whether its that the school really isnt that good for her child, or that she has negative feelings which arent part of this situation at all.

How do you know there aren't other HEors locally, OP? You should come and chat over on the HE board on MN.

AMumInScotland I guess I have always been a bit anti-establishment...was a square peg at school and home ed wold have been like a dream for me...but I am aware that my own (awful) school years may have coloured my perceptions....which is why I made myself let DC go....it just seems so worrying....all the little things which crop up...social stuff, development worries...comparing your child to others and pushing them to keep up...my DC is on the list for a great state school up the road and I suspect we may prefer a less hothousy atmsophere.

And I hate DC being so tired that we have huge tantrums of an evening.

Ooh, I'm not a zealot, well I don't think I am, I have one child in school and one at home, because I have had to consider what their needs are.
DS is already taking one IGCSE and I am sure now he is hooked, more will follow. He is very motivated and wants to learn. DS2 loves the hubble bubble of school, the noise, the people, the playtimes and has no interest in learning but they are both happy.

I would love to do this, which as a teacher I know is a bit of an odd approach! DD is only 8 wks old though, so I have a while to think about it...

The more I see the inside of large secondaries the more I'm not convinced about 'mass' education. DD is a mid-August baby as well, which'll make her very young when she starts.

DH not sure though, think he still thinks of HE'd children as those closeted by their lentil weaving parents with no friends. I think that is just cause he hasn't thought about it before, I suspect he'd come round.

MrsC2010 plus the world is vry different today....I always remeber a documentary in the early 80s about homeschooled kids...and they WERE all lentil weavers...but today people have many different reasons to teach at home. Conact wih others is simple thanks to the net...as is sourcing teaching aids.

I, like many today work entirely from home...so it's a case of choosing my hours.

The secondary schools are hideous in many cases...I went off the rails at mine...hated it....full of idiots (the teachers) and the building was n poor repair...I remember thinking "Why do I have to sit here in this ugly brown building...with rain dripping in and a disinterested teacher, when I could be at home reading Dickens?"

Had a wee here Valentin, at your last post. I remember thinking "why do I have to sit here etc etc, when I could be at home listening to radio 1 and snogging my 6th form crush boy"! Dickens? Honestly and truthfully?

YABU. "I'm not unhappy with the school as such but feel that its an awful lot to trust strangers with my DC's education" is pure control-freakery.

Lol blessed yes! I was such a geek...and so miserable! I hated company and liked reading for hours. I was about 15 mind...not reading Dickens in primary!

CoteDAzur Why? I don't know them do I...so why should I trust them?

CoteDAzur - that's nice

I'm continually surprised by people's reactions to someone having wildly different opinions and feelings to them.

Because they are professionals and they know education better than you do.

Do you not take your DC to doctors you don't know all that well when they are sick?

And I assume these teachers follow a curriculum. It is not as if they will teach your DC witchcraft.

NotAnotherBrick - I also have an opinion about people who are continuously surprised, but you probably wouldn't want to hear it

Cote they don't know my DC though....and how do you know that I am not a professional?

Have you checked out the home education regs in the country you are going to ?

Decent link to start off with

homeschooling.gomilpitas.com/regional/Region.htm#EuropeMidEast

If you are coming to Italy, drop me a line ( =

Valentin - Also, school is not just education it is also a socialization process. You will not be doing your DC a favor by plucking them out of this process.

I have checked sarah....there's loads of support there as it's quite a common thing to do.

I think if you long to do it you should just get on with it

Cote The fact that you call it a "process" is part of the very thing which turns me off it...I don't want "processed" kids.

Have you read the rest of the thread, Cote? Do you really think that HEd children can't get 'socialized'? In what way does school socialise you? (assuming you are using 'socialise' correctly ie. preparing you to live in your society?). Surely real life is going to be better than school for socialising you into living in our society?

Because, I don't know about you, but I don't spend my adult life in a room with 29 other people the same age as me being made to listen to someone in authority to me. I choose to do paid work or not, in an area I choose. I go to the post office, do shopping, do housework, deal with fincances, talk to bus drivers, police officers, members of the public...

Or do you mean children getting to socialise ie. be with other children? You do know HEd children aren't shut up in a room with no other people to speak do, don't you?

Yes, teachers are strangers to you for now, but they are professionals and you will get to know them over time, and they will get to know your DC.