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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a little suspicious/paranoid

95 replies

Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 16:32

Ok so dh is away on a lads weekend. Last night walking home from a club with all of the lads he said he decided to take a short cut alone and walk through the woods which seen him arrive back at the place they were staying 3hrs after the others at 4am.

I am not normally paranoid but for some reason this just does not ring true that he would leave his pals whilst all walking home and he seemed too quick to tell
Me this story I suppose incase someone mentioned he did not go home with the guys.

So Aibu to he suspicious here?

OP posts:
RageAgainstTheTeen · 03/10/2010 16:37

I smell bullshit.

YANBU

PinkieMinx · 03/10/2010 16:39

Suspicious of what though? If you think he's a shagger there must be other reasons.

anothermum92 · 03/10/2010 16:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 16:48

I don't know what I'm suspicious of. I do not think he would cheat on me if I'm honest but don't buy this story he told me in his rushed 5 min call this morning. It just does not make sense he would leave his pals all walking home in a town that is no more than a mile big and take 3hrs to get back. There are no casinos etc where he was they had been in a club type thing that closed at 1. I just don't get how it would take him that long to get back and why he left his pals. It's all my friends husbands he is away with so just felt he was telling me he did not go home with them
Incase I found out. The story just does not ring true.

OP posts:
Nancy66 · 03/10/2010 16:59

story is fishy.

Not sure what explanation could be though.
buying drugs?

fluffles · 03/10/2010 17:04

my DP has been known to throw up and fall asleep in a bush while out with mates (a long time ago now) Blush

does that sound like him?

i'd be much more likely to think my DP was pished out his head than cheating, but then my DP has always been rubbish at picking up women in nightclubs (before me, who he met online).

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 17:04

He likes the occasional spliff but he would tell me that and would never buy them like that. Am sure of that. He due home soon so am just going to casually ask him again how he got home and see if he says the same thing.

OP posts:
Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 17:06

Fluffles that made me laugh. Have seen dh at then
End of a heavy sesh many a time and truth be known would be shocked if any woman went near. There is just something telling me it's all a little strange. He would never leave his pals.

OP posts:
atswimtwolengths · 03/10/2010 17:11

Were they in a night club? Could he have met someone and gone home with her for a couple of hours?

Will your friend's husband tell her what happened? If so, will she tell you?

Do you think he might have gone to a prostitute?

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 17:16

It's a small town they were in so no a prostitute is not a concern. If you had asked me yesterday if I thought he was the type to cheat I would say no. But I don't believe his story simple as. He went out his way to tell me he got home 3hrs after his pals who he would
Never leave on a walk home in a tiny town you could walk 4 times over in 3hrs drunk or not. I just don't know but I feel really uneasy about it and it's the 1st time in 8 years of marriage I have had such serious
Doubts. He has just pulled up will see what he says.

OP posts:
Hedgeblunder · 03/10/2010 17:24

Hope everythings ok- I'd call his bluff and say 'that's not what I heard' and say no more, that usually makes them crack

SandStorm · 03/10/2010 17:26

Sounds to me like he got completely ratted, needed a wee in the woods, got hopelessly lost and told you in a rush because he's embarrassed about it.

PotPourri · 03/10/2010 17:27

Sounds like a bit of alfresco action tbh.

Definately sounds fishy

Mumcentreplus · 03/10/2010 17:28

Tis unusual..3hrs is a long time Hmm and why the hell would you take a short cut through the woods alone??...maybe he was fighting off a serial killer Hmm...if you have sex in the woods you usually die in to woods according to horror cliches Grin

rubbersoul · 03/10/2010 17:33

Could be something he's embarrassed about- getting really drunk and lost, falling asleep in a bush or getting in a fight maybe?

Hope it's nothing else... Sad

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 17:42

Well he came in and never as much as touched me after not seeing me since Wednesday. He chatted to me through ds. I basically said look at me and tell
Me again how it took you 3hrs to get home after leaving your pals. He said they were walking up a hill
And the way through the woods looked faster so he thought sod it and went that way. 3hours later he got back. I just said i don't believe you and came upstairs where I am now and he is downstairs with ds. So either I let it go and choose to believe him or what? I have never felt like this before.

OP posts:
Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 17:43

Excuse the typing am on my phone it
Likes to make it's own paragraphs

OP posts:
SandStorm · 03/10/2010 17:51

Not a good idea to bring it up in front of your DS. Maybe he wanted to tell you away from the children?

Give him another chance to explain when the children are in bed and you can ask him to explain in a non-accusatory way.

Hope he gives you a valid reason.

northerngirl41 · 03/10/2010 17:54

I'm for the "went for a pee, fell alseep in a bush" and he's told you about it before anyone else makes up a story to tell you...

perfumedlife · 03/10/2010 18:02

Gosh, it's the not touching or looking at you that rings my bells.

Keep calm, if you make it sound like a big deal he will clam up, try tosound relaxed.

Hope it's nothing.

LittleMissHissyFit · 03/10/2010 18:06

Agree with perfumedlife, be all OK about it and see if he cracks.. tell him no matter what, it's all OK..

then whack him with a rolling pin

Jellykat · 03/10/2010 18:24

Broodymomma reckon you should trust your feminine intuition! We,re brilliant at subconsciously picking up on body language,..
I agree with perfumedlife-The not looking at you is suspicious

Is he still wearing the same clothes? If not, pockets?Sneakily though,.. Can you smell another lady on them?Any clues?

I hope it's nothing too!

SandStorm · 03/10/2010 18:30

I may be way off the mark but I read the not looking at you as being embarrassed and not wanting to discuss whatever the issue is in front of DS. If he's never given you any cause to think these thoughts before, what makes you think them now? I know the vanishing for 3 hours is a bit odd but give him a chance when little ears aren't around.

DetectivePotato · 03/10/2010 18:33

It does seem suspicious. Especially that he rushed to tell you in a 5 minute phone call. Sounds like he wanted to cover himself in case anyone else told you he went missing in the woods for 3 hours.

I can't see why a man out with a group of mates would leave them to walk a different way on his own, why it would take 3 hours and why he acted like he did when he came home.

Sorry, but I'm with you OP, something isn't right and you should trust your instincts.

BrianAndHisBalls · 03/10/2010 18:43

just read your op to dp who im afraid said 'bullshit' before i was even half way through.

he's obviously covering his arse because they are your friends' husbands and therefore you might find out hence the 'cover story'.

Just can't see any reason he'd suddenly up and leave his friends. Trust your instincts Hmm