Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a little suspicious/paranoid

95 replies

Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 16:32

Ok so dh is away on a lads weekend. Last night walking home from a club with all of the lads he said he decided to take a short cut alone and walk through the woods which seen him arrive back at the place they were staying 3hrs after the others at 4am.

I am not normally paranoid but for some reason this just does not ring true that he would leave his pals whilst all walking home and he seemed too quick to tell
Me this story I suppose incase someone mentioned he did not go home with the guys.

So Aibu to he suspicious here?

OP posts:
Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 20:54

That's what I'm going to do panzee. Thanks to everyone for your advice it's been a shitty day!

OP posts:
Theincrediblesulk1 · 03/10/2010 20:54

What is he on? he is clearly covering something, just what that is i don't know!

Could he possibly be covering for one of his friends and just be the one who is not very good at it?

Something is up, just blank him, and he will end up spilling, don't say a word. People cant help but spill when met with silence!

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 20:57

Hmm you have never met him he is as stubborn as a mule would keep a silence going forever it's always me who caves

OP posts:
SandStorm · 03/10/2010 20:58

OP has said she believes him now so it's time for us all to support her in that and stop trying to sow any more seeds of doubt.

He's been a bit silly, probably under the influence, but unless there are other problems in your marriage I think you just need to write this one off to experience.

TheLadyEvenstar · 03/10/2010 20:59

Brains I just read it to DP and he agrees with your DP...

Theincrediblesulk1 · 03/10/2010 21:02

SandStorm
I am not sewing seeds of doubt! Stick to dictating your own posts!

PotKettleBlack · 03/10/2010 21:03

sorry to add fuel to the fire as it were - what about the trousers he was wearing last night? 2-3 hrs walking through a wood given the sort of weather we've been having (it poured all of yesterday evening here anyway) means that even sticking to paths his trouser hems should be pretty filthy. As should his shoes really.

doesn't seem to ring true to me either. sorry.

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:04

Am I being a total mug giving him the benefit of the doubt here?

OP posts:
mmmwine · 03/10/2010 21:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SandStorm · 03/10/2010 21:05

ooh - have I hit a nerve sulk? Wasn't actually talking about you in particular but if the shoe fits...

TheLadyEvenstar · 03/10/2010 21:06

Broody, was it raining where they were?

Because you know yourself even if on paths in a park there is always some mud if there has been rain.....

Theincrediblesulk1 · 03/10/2010 21:06

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:06

Have not seen the trousers closed the bag after seeing the clean shoes. Had started to believe him when he swore on our sons life now I'm not sure. Surely nobody would swear on their Childs life?

OP posts:
Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:08

They were on a golfing thing weather was actually
Nice his golf stuff is not that muddy

OP posts:
Mumcentreplus · 03/10/2010 21:08

Hijack - Hey TLE

Theincrediblesulk1 · 03/10/2010 21:08

I don't think you are being a mug, we don't know him so we are seeing it very differently to yourself. But i would trust your gut, and you don't seem happy with his explanations.

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:12

When he explains it and showed me it on google
Map i do believe him but looking at it through others eyes makes me see it is dodgy. He is stubborn so I could see if he thought another way was quicker he would just wander off. Due to start ivf in few weeks and am wound up don't know if im just making something out of nothing. He Cant believe the fuss I have made.

OP posts:
RespectTheDoughnut · 03/10/2010 21:14

Not to say one way or the other (if you genuinely believe him, then great - but you sound like you have doubts?), but my H swore on our DS's life something which was a huge lie Hmm So it's not necessarily as meaningful as you'd hope.

TheLadyEvenstar · 03/10/2010 21:14

Broody oh yes they do swear on their childrens lives...even down to ex-p who i caught shagging in my bed swore on DS1's like "I swear on DS1's life its not what it seems"

No he was keeping the slapper warm as it was so frigging cold out!

Mumcentreplus · 03/10/2010 21:19

Well he should be reassuring you..tbh I kinda believe him..but he acted like a secretive prat ..why?..I'm sure if it was the other way around he would have issues too.be honest with him about how you feel...don't spare his feelings..you have to tell him how you felt and why..and if you expect him to be totally honest with you then tell him..

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:20

Seriously??? That is awful. See this is exactly where my doubt lies. How many women are sat at home trusting their other halves (and men vice versa) believing in what they tell you especially when they swear on their Childs life and it's all shit. God I don't know what to think.

OP posts:
Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:21

Ladyevenstar that must have been bloody awful for you. Did you have no idea?

OP posts:
TheLadyEvenstar · 03/10/2010 21:24

Broody I had had suspicions for a while but I guess the big clue was walking in from a club and finding him on top of her shagging her....not really anyway he could deny it but he tried.....Lets say she left my home in a hurry....After her clothes did Grin

Original poster
Broodymomma · 03/10/2010 21:26

God that makes me sick. What a arsehole! Feel daft moaning about this situation when you have gone through that.

OP posts:
TheLadyEvenstar · 03/10/2010 21:29

Broody, oh its a long time ago now and I laugh at how pathetic he was and still is. Begging me to go back to him blah blah blah after 10 yrs apart.

TBH I would be suspicious of his actions but simply because things don't add up. Walking through a forest even with paths there would be mud on his shoes, his trousers would be wet/marked etc.