in laws and 'proprietary' behaviour - talk to me

[LetThemEatCake]

I wonder just how unreasonable I am to dislike what I perceive to be proprietary/ possessive behaviour from my in-laws towards my dc

so tell me your tales of in-law woe and I will be better able to gauge not just how bad/ not bad they are but also how out of order I am for getting annoyed!!

blimey!even if this thread was done last yr!
mines mild compared to these in laws!

When my mum is talking to MY DDs, she will often refer to herself as 'mummy', as in 'come to mummy' meaning herself and 'give it to mummy'.

It is a very good job she is my beloved mum because if it were my Mil doing this, I think I would explode.

Im only 23 weeks at the moment, and my mum is already talking about 'her baby'. She is pretty mental at the best of times though. MIL is laid back, so I've got the best of both extremes. :)

the my bzby thing didnt bother me,she never ment it as in dss are hersi call my neicesmy baby girls` but i know they are not mine.
i use to get the i dont always agree with the way you do things but i dont say anything!lol
when ds2 was a few months old it was bonfire night and we had a few fireworks in in laws garden and i was making homemade hot chocolate for everyone so mil said she would get ds2 in his snowsuit and he was crying and she shouted at him to shut up,i send dh in before i did something i shouldnt!
and when twins were 2 weeks old they got rushed into hospital and mil & sil were out shopping with ds1 & 2 and called sil to say we were in the hospital and mil cried and shouted she had to be there but we said to sil to get her to take the other 2 home and wait till we knew more and sil said that was cool as mil had been really snappy with the boys etc turned out it was the lead up to her strokes :(

other than that pretty much ok apart from accusing us of lying last xmas about the car breaking down!

Mil used to collect ds from school without asking/being asked. I'd often find myself on the bus to collect him and receive a call from her saying he was in her car The icing on the cake was her going into his school, (unannounced and uninvited) and telling the headteacher I was jealous of ds's father's new marriage and asking for copies of his school report because I didn't give them any information about ds I went nuts at her and our 'relationship' has never recovered.

Oh yes, when ds was 3 he burned his hand on a storage heater. It was bandaged to keep it clean and the blister had burst, leaving a huge flap of skin on the palm of his hand. He spent a few hours at her house with her, she returned him minus the bandage and minus the flap of skin, leaving his hand red raw. Apparently he'd picked it off himself I could go on as there's a lot.

Last one; on the day of my best friends wedding in a dress that I had borrowed, she kindly offered to give us a lift to the wedding and to babysit ds so I could enjoy the reception and evening with my friends. She pumped him so full of juice whilst I was getting ready that he puked all over me whilst travelling to the wedding. Nice!

I have two MiLs (divorces etc). One is fabulous, would never do anything without checking.
His real Mum, however, is banned from our house!
She did come over, the twins were five days old, their brothers 19 months and twelve years. I'd had an emergency section. She sat in Sainsbury's cafe whilst I shopped. I waited on her hand and foot, and the only meal she cooked was the one she made when we had popped out for an hour, eg. just for herself. She spent the whole time criticising my DH, her DS, whilst ignoring me. That was 15 years ago.
Yeah, I'm over it!

Bloody hell, this is an old thread and I've already complained about my MIL on here!

:o

My ex mother-in-law isn't permitted to see my kids. That's the decision of my ex and myself.

Hoping that the rest of you ladies with truly toxic family members (I know it isn't just those pesky in-laws) find ways of making a stand and doing what is right.

I do not take as much offence with my MIL as I used to but I do remember, one occasion, at Xmas.

This Xmas was the first time that both DDs were old enough to help decorate the tree. We had set aside Saturday evening after tea to do this.

I had been at work all day and was really looking forward to this 'first' (something that is now a tradition). I came home to find that the tree had been decorated! MIL said she had decided to do it to 'save me the trouble when I came home as I would obviously be tired.

Grrrr...

We have also has the 'I'm the Mum' conversations...