in laws and 'proprietary' behaviour - talk to me

[LetThemEatCake]

I wonder just how unreasonable I am to dislike what I perceive to be proprietary/ possessive behaviour from my in-laws towards my dc

so tell me your tales of in-law woe and I will be better able to gauge not just how bad/ not bad they are but also how out of order I am for getting annoyed!!

Femalevictormeldrew - the blue-eyes thing really reminds me of my ILs. Such a small thing but it really speaks volumes doesn't it? My son has big blue eyes that absolutely EVERYBODY comments on (sorry to make you reach for the sick-bucket but it's necessary to get the point across). I also have blue eyes. Nobody at all on my DH's side has blue eyes. ILs have not mentioned my son's eyes once in his whole 16-month life.

My dh told MIL that I wanted to be let alone to bf. That was the time she stroked me!

I forgot to mention that the day she moved my boob, as soon as we had walked into the house she lifted my top up over my head so she could see my bump. My FIL turned round to offer me a cup of tea and was greeted by my tiger-attack stomach (grotesque stretchmarks) and enormous norks. Nice.

Puddle - she's a complete nut job!? What does your DH say about her?? How many times have you said to her 'What the fuck do you think you are doing?' ??

eastegg my lovely grandson had blue eyes for about 9 or 10 months; they gradually turned dark brown then.

I believe it is quite common for them to change.

Do you think your inlaws were praying they would change?

She drives dh up the wall too. And get this... I'm the in-law she likes!

puddle

Euphemia not to worry,that sort of thing usually has the opposite effect anyway.

I actually like my mil very much but she is bonkers at times. She really does not like the name of ds so calls him something else. Not hugely different, let's say Jack instead of Zack. So irritating, though particularly as his middle name is after her dad as a tribute. Really confuses all the dc.

i dont understand why you let your mils call your children something other than their given name.

time and again i have read it on this thread

i would have to say " HIS NAME IS JACK. USE IT"

Peter, my MIL calls her own DD by a completely different name to her real name, took me ages to work out who the hell she was going on about!

Turns out FIL chose the name and she has never liked it!

My MIL is so possessive over DD - and I notice that most of the cases on this thread are about DD's. - She calls her 'her baby', and in the card she bought after I had DD (bearing in mind how I already have 2 DS's) she put 'at last, a grandaughter'

She also told us she was doing some research into tablets she had found that she could take so that she could BF DD - incase I had problems like I did with my DS's. I was so stunned I couldnt say anything. Luckily DH was very firm with her, its actually the only time I have seen him stand up to her.

thesecondcomin that is AWFUL

SOV - another nutter to add to the pile!

TSC - no matter how many other MIL's are bonkers - yours will always get the 'Top Bonker' award :(

Depends -my mil is on the obsessive side. If ds were to say he hated me she'd be the happiest lady in town.

That says it all to me.

Blimey TSC, makes me glad MIL is a JW and refuses to do birthdays!

SOV That really wins the thread!

TSC have you caved in??? I hope DH has promised you lots of good stuff to make it worth your while Hopefully DD will still be going through her weeing everywhere stage - KaChing - payback!

I still think you are mad to go - I'd be telling him I'd think about it when the kids have left home and not to ask again until then.

AH - well, fair enough. I'm glad you have set your terms out so clearly . If it all goes to plan, it might not be too bad. When are you going?

SOV what did your dh say?

"mum, keep your breastmilk!"

My MIL isnt all that bad, apart from wanting to know when me and DH are going to leave DD with them overnight, i'm 34 weeks pregnant, they live 1.5 hours away and want us to leave her with them, the honest answer (at this moment in time) is NEVER.

my SIL however is a complete nutcase i just dont have the energy to fully into detail so i am aware this may just come accross as petty.

SIL has a twin brother who died 10 years ago (he was married btw and ttc his own family when he died it was all very sad) anyway, she is adiment that my unborn DD is actually a boy and as DH looks the splitting image of said brother this child will look exactly like him WILL be called his name and it will be like having brother back in the family again.
Except i am having a GIRL DH looks nothing like the brother and even if the docs are wrong and its a boy my child is her own person and NOT a re-carnation of the brother