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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not allow my DP to use the internet?

34 replies

StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 21/09/2010 19:16

We use a payg dongle, due to poverty.

I pay for it. I put on it an amount that would normal last a month, last week.

80% of it is now gone. There is a great deal of youtube in the internet history - all of it my DP's useage.

I am very careful what I look at on the internet - I can make this last six weeks easily.

Would I be unreasonable to hide the dongle effectively denying him any home internet use (the library is free!) until he pays up?

Annoyed.

OP posts:
SacharissaCripslock · 21/09/2010 19:17

Why doesn't he just get his own payg dongle? I'd kick him in his dongle for using up my dongle!

[loves the word dongle]

nomedoit · 21/09/2010 19:17

YANBU. He can pay for it or go to the library. Youtube is optional, MN is essential.

Original poster
StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 21/09/2010 19:19

MN doesn't suck up all the credit at the rate that videos do!

Now how do I handle this? Just hide it and say nothing and wait for him to complain or confront him about it?

We're poor, btw.

OP posts:
catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 19:21

Not unreasonable at all, he should pay for his own usage/dongle whatever.

Original poster
StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 21/09/2010 19:23

Right, dongle is being hidden.

OP posts:
catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 19:25

Hide the damn thing. Pretend you've lost it. Change your password.
No wonder you're poor if he lives off you.

catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 19:26

Good girl.

Original poster
StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 21/09/2010 19:28

Urgh, just not looking forward to the fight later on.

OP posts:
QuizteamBleakley · 21/09/2010 19:32

How much do you pay for your dongle? (bloody hell, had I read that ten years ago I'd have figured myself as some kinda ho!)

I ask as I have seen SOOO many brilliant money saving / budgeting ideas on here - I'm bugger-all use but there are so many options that a MN genius may have a better plan - poor or no. Do you pay for mobi & landline??

llbeanj · 21/09/2010 19:49

why not behave like adults and have a conversation about it, instead of playing childish hiding games?

Original poster
StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 21/09/2010 19:55

Because I know it'll cause a fight and I can't be arsed with it.

OP posts:
catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 20:02

Why can't he pay his own way?

Tippychoocks · 21/09/2010 20:09

I found dongle crap, much more expensive than the cheapest BB package as I had to download docs for uni.

And yes, I would hide it.

mountainmonkey · 21/09/2010 20:11

I wouldn't hide it. Why can't you just sit and have a calm discussion? Surely hiding it is just delaying the inevitable- you're gonna have to address the issue eventually.

SheWillBeLoved · 21/09/2010 20:20

You don't have to have a fight, what is he, a spoilt 15 year old who will shout "ARGH that is SO unfaiiiirrr!"?

Just calmy tell him that you cannot afford to have him using it for the things that he does, and he can either top it up/buy his on, or stop looking at bloody youtube.

catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 20:24

Tippychooks, one of the things that make being poor suck is that only the most stupidly expensive solutions are available to you.

mountainmonky, how can you have a reasonable discussion with an adult who behaves that way? Let him work out why he shouldn't be abusing the OP's resources.

catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 20:25

Come on Stuck tell us what else you pay for.

Tippychoocks · 21/09/2010 20:30

Oh I know catherine, trust me. Am well used to paying more per unit for just about everything because I cannot pay in advance or direct debit or am stuck on stupid meters.
Poverty trap a gogo here.
But I found the 3g dongle needed topping up all the time and for more than I have to pay now so thought I'd mention it.

LittleMissHissyFit · 21/09/2010 20:34

have you tried Orange home broadband? if you have an orange phone at one point it was free, unless your exchange didn't permit, but otherwise it's only £7.50 a month.

see if it's right for you here

HappyMummyOfOne · 21/09/2010 20:36

If he pays other bills then surely he has just the same right to surf as you do?

FairgroundTown · 21/09/2010 20:42

If you are really sensitive to the cost, why have you even got Flash installed? Your credits will last a lot longer without it; and it is rarely essential.

(YT will work without Flash under some circumstances, but not on a default Windows system, I don't think.)

So, uninstall it, and the problem is solved.

Original poster
StuckInTheMiddleWithYou · 21/09/2010 20:45

I can't afford the installation of a landline needed for normal internet.

He does pay for other stuff, I'm just irritated as he knows am skint this month.

OP posts:
SolidGoldBrass · 21/09/2010 20:51

HAve a think about whether this sort of selfish behaviour is going on in any other area of your lives - does he pay his share of rent, food, bills? Does he do his share of domestic work? If it's just the internet use, tell him that you think it would be a better idea for you each to have your own dongles, same as you (presumably) take care of your own mobile phones and sims.

piratecat · 21/09/2010 20:57

installation of a landline is v expensive yes. i remember 4 yrs back it was about 120 or something.

catherinedenerve · 21/09/2010 20:57

Well then, he's had his fun for this month.