to think this is a bit inappropriate or am I being too PC

[Ladyanonymous]

I hope this post doesn't seem icky I don't mean it to - I would really like to know what other people think.

Have 3 DCs, DS1 13, DD 11, DS2 8.

Have partners 2 DD's staying pretty regularly aged 3 and 5.

Thing is whenever they come their mum sends them with really short nighties and he never makes them wear any knickers and they play really boisterously and completely innocently with my kids for a few hours whole they are all in their night gear, so everything is on view as it were.

AIBU to feel this isn't appropriate esp for my 13 yr old DS? I have suggested to OH that it might be better if they wore some knickers...or am I being overly concerned about something which is just innocent??

I work in CP so don't know if my judgement is somewhat clouded - hence my post...

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OP - I don't see any reason for you to be worried and I agree your judgement is possibly clouded by your work in CP. I very much doubt your DS's are bothered by their DSS's nudity.

I actually think it is really nice to read that your DC and DSD's get on so well and love playing together, sounds like you have one happy household :)

Personally I don't like it and I would get them to cover up, no matter what the ages of older children around. I don't like it when children are allowed to flash all and sundry to everyone, regardless of if its not sexual or not.

YANBU, OP. I would just buy some knickers or PJs and tell your DH that you would prefer it if they were covered up.

I think that different people must post on different threads-I find this one peculiar!
We have had people asserting 'that of course their 8 yr old DS must gets changed in the ladies changing room, because he needs to be protected by mum, and women and girls are unnecessarily coy to not want to get dressed in front of him' and yet a 13 yr old boy can't cope with a small girl of 5 having a bare bottom! Has the 13 yr old been asked whether it bothers him?
When I was 13 yrs I regularly bathed my younger brother-if the sexes were changed and I had been a 13 yr old boy bathing my young sister is this inappropriate? It seems weird to me-these are very small children -you can see lots of them naked on the beach or in gardens in the summer-am I missing something-should it not be allowed?

Thanks for all the opinions - No my 13 yr old doesn't seem remotely embarrassed - I think its just me wanting everything to be "right" so both myself and my kids are not open to any accusation by anyone and their mum knows they are safe and loved here.

We let them stay up late together on the weekend thats why. And yes the poster who said if it was boys and an older girl would it bother me? TBH no.

So looking at it like that I am being over cautious and enjoyed looking at my 13 yr old ds and my OH's 5 yr old DD curled up on the sofa together last night playing on his DSi.

:) all is well in the LA household then - love them all, enjoy them all - don't let this mad world spoil anything x

If he isn't remotely embarrassed then I wouldn't worry. It is a sad world where you are worried about them being open to accusation. If you take that view then he could be open to accusation whether they have nighties or pyjamas- to be completely safe you would have to make sure they are never alone together- and that really would be a sad world.

PLEASE will people stop calling little girl's gentials 'bits"? It's so horrible - I'd rather have the soppy euphemisms than that.

And if your older one seems embarassed, then maybe find a way of getting them to put pants on without for a moment suggesting that there is anything wrong with them being naked. But if he isn't, just carry on as you are.

Seeker - No, I for one wont just because you don't like it. People can call them what they like, bits wouldn't be my first choice, but it's the term many people use - it's all encompassing, isn't vulgar and does the job. If you'd bothered to read the last page, then you'd know if the older one was embarassed or not - the answer is all of three posts before yours.

Why should they cover their 'bits' up? Thats how people end up with hang ups about their bodies. If the 13 year old is embarrassed I am sure he will say so. PJ's would be better in the cold weather anyhow.

They're little children. Don't make them embarrassed by something so innocent at such an early age - it doesn't matter if they have their "bits" out really does it?

I had never heard the term 'bits' before MN -I agree that it is horrible.

My friend uses the term Bits for her DD and willy for the boy, I often wonder why she does this as one is correct the other sounds wrong.

I have family members who use "bits". I think it's horrible, vulgar, distasteful and and somehow disparaging all at the same time.

Chippinin - I do apologixe for not paying proper atention - I will try to do better next time.

Seeker

Oh right! I will from now on refer to my 2 year olds private parts as her Genitalia...I will also take her to see a revival of The Vagina Monologues so she gets a positve view of her bits...ooohhh sorry! Her Vulva?

What a lot of rot! I was brought up calling my genitals all sorts of silly, fun names..and I dont have a negative view of my "area"...or my pocket-book as I heard one nice American woman call it....I see people on here call it a foof!

Bits! Bits! Bits and pieces! Bits, bits, bits! get over it!

You have an opinion. So do I. And where did I say it's either bits or genitalia? (although I do think it's important that children know the proper names for things, even if they don't use them in front of Granny - the vagina/vulva thing is a case in point. Many adults wome don't seem to know the difference!)

I prefer foof to bits, actually!

Seeker...you didn't just display your opinion..you actually asked people to not use the term "bits"! Cheek!

I'll use what I want.

Bits is as daft as foof but neither are "denigrating" lol! Don't denigrate my vag. if you please!

Lol...I'm not worked up...I'm having a banter! If anyone got worked up it was you!

,checks banterometer for malfunction>

Not a lot of fun here is it?

Bits to me is all encompassing, i.e. bottom and genitals and equally valid for male and females.

What other words are there?

Nether regions?

People do get worked up about names for genitals don't they?!

My daughter calls her stomach/abdomen her tummy...should she not? I think it is a ridiculous middle class idea that children should use the correct biological word for parts of their bodies. How silly.

why are people have such fascist views on what anyone calls children's genitals?

bits and bobs, we call them and i don't give a shit.

anyway, it's your call, LA but i can't say i'd be concerned unless the 13 year old seemed uncomfortable. i don't see why you can't have separate night wear at your house for when they stay, though?

Don't denigrate my vag. if you please!

[clapping] - we so need a 'clapping' smiley here!!!!