To be stressed about this?

[thefirstmrsDeVere]

Ok, following on from 'lots of needy threads' thingy.

Here is your space to tell everyone what is 'stressing' you at the moment. I mean 'stress' because we all know its not the end of the world, there are people far worse off than us blah blah. I have a seperate thread for the thing that causes me real, deep down stress and I have the SN boards for my other really stressful thing.

This is for the stuff like:

Someone in my family messed up the combination on the little padlock I keep on a certain kitchen cupboard (long story, dont judge). I bought a combination lock because someone kept losing the key to the other one. So at stupid oclock this morning I had to unscrew the bloody door to get at the baby breakfast that is also kept in there (note - I dont lock the baby food up, it is just kept in there as well)

Did the shopping in Morrisons today, full of horrible people shouting at each other and buying pies. Got to my car, opened the boot only to find my OH had put the buggy in there and didnt think to tell me. Drove home with boxes of rice crispies etc falling on me every time I turned the corner.

DC2's school bus is late every flippin day and its COLD.

Next promised I could have my new biker boots today and they LIED.

All that lovely hair I had thanks to two quite close together pregnancies has now fallen out. Crowning glory? No.

Anyone want to join me in a big ol whinge fest?

Thanks Electric - have come up with a way of not doing a 'major Bissell' again - am going to ask him to wear those blue plastic overshoe thingys like they have in swimming pools. I will provide of course

Am shocked re. your ex-boss Hope you find something equally satisfying.

Thanks Electric

I've got a sore throat

I have no mummy friends and I'm so crap at talking to people I go to baby groups with the intention of making friends then end up sitting on my own feeling self conscious then come home feeling sorry for myself - then do exactly the same thing again the next day.

I've almost finished my maternity leave but I have no childcare and I hate my job

I'm seriously poor! My total income is £20.30 per week child benefit and the bank charges me £22 per week in unauthorized overdraft fees, I've asked them to stop the fees for one month while I get back on track but they won't

Ds's bedtime was 2 hours ago and hes still awake

Oh dear!

DH is going away for two weeks and I'm feeling irrationally worried that something will happen to him, on the place or while he's away

We put the central heating on for the first time and I'm worried about spiders coming in, attracted by the warmth

DH has thoughtfully bought me some chocolates but I'm trying to lose weight and am physically incapable of just not stuffing all the chocolates into my fat greedy cakehole

My boss' boss has just noticed that we have accidentally misplaced £100k in our overall budget

Liverpool are 1 all at home against some european no marks

Oh God, I shouldn;t have opened this thread. I will be on here for hours.

I am so stressed I have rashes, acne (first time ever and my hair is falling out.

I have a gorgeous 3 year old DD1(stressy enough at times with her OCD tendencies ). I have a gorgeous 5.5 month old DD2. Who is beautiful. And wonderful. But will just not sleep at night. 2 hours max Don't know what to do. Started weaning her, it worked for one night. Gah.

Not helped by the fact that as soon as DD2 wakes in the night, I see to her as I don't want DH disturbed. My darling DH is so seriously ill, I just don't know what to do. He was diagnosed with cancer prostrate, secondary lymph nodes & bone) when DD2 was just 5 weeks old. He's gone downhill majorily in the last few days. I am beside myself with worry and fear.

Add to that the death of my very wonderful father in July, quickly followed by moving house and I am more stressed than I could possibly have ever thought possible.

Sadly, I am pretty sure the stress is just going to get worse. DH's illness is not just going to get better. It will dip and rise, but mostly - at the moment - I fear it will dive. I love him so much. I really don't know what to do.

There you go. I can even bring down a stressy thread.
Sorry. That's stressing me out too. Opening up, sharing all my woes. And then appearing needy.

Give over Rind you are not appearing needy! Well perhaps in need of a cuddle.
I got acne when DC4 was about 6mths old. My GP gave me a dabber thing that cleared it up nicely. My DC5 is just over 5mths so I am expected spots any minute and as I said alread, I am virtually bald.

So sorry about your DH. Cancer fucking sucks.

This thread is so you can rant away and NOT feel judged.

You havent bought the thread down either x

Bless you MrsDeV

Another thing I am stressed about is that I forgot to take the fucking bin out tonight. It is a long walk up past some creepy old barns and so bugger it if I am going to do it now. Will just have to try and get up and out before the binmen in the morning. Must get on to the council in the morning and persuade them that their men really do need to come down the lane to get the bin.

Oh Rindercella you poor thing. Whinge away, really. I'm so sorry, you must be exhausted

cross post - the bin thing would drive me mad too

Minor stressy thing in the scheme of stressy things.....

Fecking weather... whenever I want to do anything, anything at all, that involves being outside, the forecast says 'rain'

Rind phone them up and tell them about your circumstances. I am sure they can get their arses down your lane to pick up your bin.

One less fecking thing for you to stress about.

Margee, just read your other post. I'll be your Mummy friend Seriously, some of those M&T groups stink. I have just started taking DD2 swimming and I am so pleased I know one of the other Mums there - the whole of the rest of the class were in the same NCT group. If DD2 had been my first child, I would feel so isolated.

It can be crap when you first become a mum - everyone says, oh, now you're a mum you will make loads of friends. It doesn't always work like that, and like most things, good friends are a long time in the making I am so lucky now that I do have some fantastic friends locally. But when DD1 was tiny, I did struggle.

Oh Marjee - I feel quite pathetic now complaining about my pre night out bad skin .

Why dont you contact National Debt Helpline - they are really helpful - you can download standard letters to your bank etc - or they will help you negotiate to get out of that vicious circle.

I nearly cried at your 'no friends' paragraph. I used to be just like you - You sound very shy. Just remember that not everybody likes loud outgoing people - the ones you maybe even envy - many people prefer being around quieter calmer people like yourself. If you cant make yourself do it for yourself can you not try and socialise through your DS. I dont want to send you on a guilt trip as you already sound down enough but he will miss out too. Children (and dogs I've found !) are great ice-breakers for shy and/or lonely people. Could you not casually let your DS crawl over to the other tots and then move nearer yourself to 'oversee' him. If you cant manage that in one hit then set yourself a target every day to just sit a bit closer to the others before 'sending him in'. Then all you have to do is smile at another mum or make a nice comment about her little one - how old is he/she - they are sitting up well for their age etc. Nearly all mums love talking about their babies and once you have spoken to one it gets easier with every person you speak to. Soon these strangers will become acquaintances and some will even become what you call 'mummy friends' I'm sure - as you sound a lovely person.

Ah thanks Rindercella, ds is asleep and now I have a mummy friend thats 2 things crossed off my list!

You seem to be having a really shit time at the moment, whinge away if it helps (not saying you are btw, just that you can if you want). This thread was such a good idea! Xx

Marjee - pick a mum, any mum. Ask her how old her baby is. Tell her how old yours is. Ask her how long she's been coming to the group. Ask her if she knows many other people there - say that you don't. When it's tea/coffee time offer to get a cup for both of you or to watch her baby while she has a drink, that's always a good one. Start with friendly small talk - look approachable. Tell her about something you've found tricky with your baby - she's bound to have something of her own to add eg God, I'm so tired - I hardly had any sleep last night etc etc

If you do this sort of small talk with a few mums, keep coming back to the group and look like a friendly person I'm sure you'll soon have a few 'mummy friends'.

No feeling pathetic on this thread please madmn. All whinges, worries and troubles are valid here.

marjee I have been going to P&T groups for the best (worst) part of 18 years. They are all, without exception clique (sp). Its their nature. If you happen to be a part of that clique they are great, if you dont, they are crap.
Its nothing to do with you. You are very brave to go on your own, well done you

I have been feeling a bit lonely myself recently. I have some friends but my life has been so fecking chaotic since I moved here I havent had the opportunity to put down real roots. People are nice round here but I really dont fit in.

madm52 said it better than I did, Marjee

Do you know, last night I saw the thread about the needy threads & held off having a moan about my Homestart lady. I did post today, but probably seemed too needy to get much response.

So...another thing I feel stressy about (and I feel I can now share this amongst friends, Marjee ) is that my Homestart lady - who does annoy me at times, coming in helping the poor & the needy...am definitely a tick in the box for her week - she came yesterday. Looked after DD1 while I popped to the dr's for half an hour with DD2. When I came back she had emptied the chest of crap toys in the playroom. On the pretense of 'sorting it out' 10 minutes later she said, 'oh crikey is that the time?! Must dash' and buggered off leaving me with loads of rubbish to sort out I would never have started on sorting that chest out as I knew it needed proper time set aside to do properly. So it took me an hour this morning (which I really didn't have) to sort out so that DD1 could use her playroom again

Now, what's stressing me out about this is that I really don't want this woman coming again. This was probably the last straw and I know I need to call the area person up tomorrow to ask that this woman stops coming. I hate doing stuff like that, so that's stressing me too.

Oh god madmn don't feel bad! This threads for venting - vent away! Everything will be fine, this is just a short term blip, I'm not really down just a bit lonely at times. I have friends but noone around in the day when dh is at work. Sometimes I just think how lovely it would be to meet up for coffee with other mums etc but hey it could be worse! Thanks so much for your advice, you seem lovely too xx

Agree rinders about some of these groups of 'mummys' can be quite clanny and not very fussed about including everyone. But there are usually some 'nice' ones who are approachable. If you are shy yourself I think you tend to avoid any bossy outspoken ones anyway.

X posted with everyone! Thank you all, you're all so lovely! I have to disappear for a short while but I'll be back soon xx

I am stressed because
I am trying to do a fulltime job in 3 days a week
I am trying to support a friend who's going through a bad time and I just can't seem to say no to hour long phone calls till silly o clock
DD has started to wake up pre 7am for 1st time in over a year
There is always some horrendous traffic jam on the A14 for no apparent reason
We ran out of money to finish our bathroom refit and now I have a lovely ornamental shower that doesn't work because it needs a pump. It makes me cross each and every morning that does.

I am tired.

I am eating rubbish.

I look shite.

People have stopped looking surprised when I say how old I am - I assume I now look my age (45 next week).

I hate my job and I work full time. Iused to love my job. What happened?

Bloody Toys'R'Us delivered a baby walker yesterday instead of the car seat I had ordered. I have to do all sorts of things in order to ensure it gets taken back before I go on holiday.

DD's bloody talking bloody Woody finally arrived this morning. While I was out. It has been returned to the Post Office. I have to wait 48 hours before I can collect it. I have to go to PO on Saturday morning and get back in time for car taking us to airport, etc. Grrrrrrrr!

There are days when being a single parent is fabulous. Today wasn't one of them.

Otherwise, most things are ok. Ish.